Werewolf Among Wizards
by shewolf2000
Summary: "Isn't that a bit – boring?" James asked. "What?" said Sirius. "If we just tell Remus that we know he's a werewolf; it doesn't seem like very much fun," James explained. Sirius and Peter exchanged confused looks again. "What are you talking about?" Sirius asked. "I think," James said, a mischievous grin spreading across his face, "I've got a better idea." MWPP
1. His Worst Fear

**Werewolf Among Wizards** by shewolf2000

Summary: A chronological series of glimpses into different times during Remus's seven years at Hogwarts, starting with his friends discovering secret and ending with their graduation. Each chapter attempts to answer the question: Is Remus a normal wizard who just has a "furry little problem", or is he a werewolf among wizards, trying to fit in where he may never truly belong?

Friendship/Drama, but with plenty of Marauder humor along the way :) T for language at the moment, minor sexual references in later chapters.

* * *

His Worst Fear

One rainy Wednesday evening in mid April found first year James Potter sitting alone in the library at Hogwarts School, poring over a book that lay open on the table in front of him. James was a clever boy, one of the best in his class, but it was still rather unusual to run across him in the library. James prided himself on being able to get excellent marks with little to no effort, a fact that thoroughly annoyed those of his fellow students who actually had to work to pass their classes. But those who had seen James in the library tonight and regarded him with curiosity might have spared their confusion. James was _not_ doing schoolwork.

The twelve-year-old James had two great loves in life: Quidditch and causing trouble. But he also had a passion for solving mysteries when they presented themselves to him. James had been working on one particular mystery for a few months now. He had researched, interrogated, and observed, and finally, his work had paid off. James sat in the library, knowing, beyond doubt, that on this rainy Wednesday April evening, he had solved the mystery at last.

The mystery involved his friend and fellow Gryffindor, Remus Lupin. Remus and James slept in the same dormitory, and it didn't take a particularly observant person to see that there was something funny about the Lupin kid. He was pleasant, reasonably clever, and a good friend, but there was definitely something wrong about him. Most strange, perhaps, were his rather frequent and not-so-inconspicuous absences from the Gryffindor Tower dormitory. His first absences had seemed innocent enough at the time. About ten days into their first term, Remus had said that his mother was ill and that he had to go home to see her. _Unfortunate and understandable._ Then, about a month later, he said that his grandfather had died and that he had to go home for the funeral. _Sad and perfectly plausible._ The next month his grandmother died and he had to go home for _her_ funeral. _Err… Okay. _A month after that, he said that he was feeling really ill and was going to spend the night in the hospital wing. _Sure, why not?_

If it hadn't been his fourth absence in three and a half months, his friends would have found the need for Remus to spend a night in the hospital wing a more than believable excuse for him being gone. Remus looked ill a lot of the time. He was very pale and a little peaky on his best days. Other days, he looked downright nauseous and miserable with sickness. He would become exhausted and develop dark shadows under his eyes. His friends, concerned, would ask him how he was feeling, and he would always insist that he was fine or "Just a bit tired". It was perfectly possible to see him becoming ill enough to require a night's stay in the hospital wing. Except: when James, Sirius, and Peter had gone to visit him, Madame Pomfery wouldn't let them in to see him. This, in James's opinion, either meant that Remus was really _really_ ill, or else that this was yet another poorly explained absence. What was more, when Remus had recovered and returned, he was unable to tell them what he had been sick with.

A month after this, his other grandfather died. This turned what had hitherto been innocent curiosity into suspicion.

"There's something very strange about Remus." James had remarked.

"You think?" Sirius had replied sarcastically.

Then, (as if all of this wasn't enough strangeness for one kid) there were the injuries. Remus could make up endless excuses for his absences and his illnesses, but he could never explain his injuries to an even moderately satisfactory level. There was just no explanation for him going home to see his sick mother or attend a funeral and coming back looking like he'd wrestled a troll; and lost. This fifth disappearance was accompanied with some particularly gruesome looking injuries.

"Merlin, Remus, what the hell happened to you?" Sirius had asked.

"I fell," Remus had replied shortly.

_Sure you did, Remus. Sure you did._ And so James had decided that this was a mystery he had to figure out. He started with a direct approach:

"Remus?"

"Yes," Remus had replied without raising is eyes from his transfiguration notes.

"Where do you keep going all the time?"

Remus looked up. His expression was confused. "Going?"

"You know, when you're not in our dormitory. You're gone at least once a month."

Remus had tensed for a moment, then seemed to feign calmness. "I guess."

"So where do you keep going?"

"I've told you where I've gone every time."

"Yes," James had said thoughtfully, "the thing is, I'm not sure I believe you." When Remus didn't reply, he pressed on, "You're gone more than anyone else in school. And I don't believe that you go home each time. You always come back covered in scratches and injuries. And I know it's not because of your family, because you looked just a beat up after you 'supposedly' spent the night in the hospital wing. And – "

"Leave me alone, James," Remus had snapped. But instead of being deflected, Remus's sudden defensiveness caused James's interest to peak.

"I want to know where you keep going," James had insisted.

"Mind your own business."

"I want to know the truth."

"That's unfortunate for you," Remus said darkly.

"Come on," James had said, "you know you can trust me."

"I never said I didn't trust you. You said you didn't believe _me_."

"So are you going to tell me the truth or not?" Remus didn't reply. "Fine then. But just so you know, I _am_ going to figure it out eventually, whether or not you tell me." James walked away, but as he had, he had turned back to look at Remus. Unless James had been imagining it, Remus looked worried.

A few days later (about a month after his last absence) Remus was absent from the dormitory yet again. This time he had not offered an explanation as to where he was going. When he returned, James had asked, "So, where were you last night?"

Remus had looked at him coldly, "You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"No," James had agreed, "I probably wouldn't."

Remus and James had been unusually distant in the days following this. James hadn't liked it at all. He might have been frustrated with Remus, but he didn't want to lose Remus as a friend. He started trying to repair the damage by pretending that he was no longer interested in the mystery of Remus's disappearances, or in anything else that was strange about Remus. It worked; they became perfectly friendly again, and when Remus disappeared the next month, saying his mother had fallen ill again, James was careful not to challenge the excuse.

And so began the indirect approach. James had observed Remus's behavior surreptitiously. He had racked his brains for hours trying to figure out an illness that matched Remus's symptoms; but what illness could cause bruises and scratches? James was sure the answer lay in the unexplained absences. He tried desperately to think what was special about these dates, why they were significant, what they had in common. The only thing he could find was that the dates were all about month apart, but he'd known this for a while now and it was useless to him. But there _had_ to be an explanation. James remained convinced of that. So despite his lack of progress, he had not given up his quest for the answer.

It wasn't until a little earlier on this rainy Wednesday evening in mid April, while sitting in the common room, that James had had a breakthrough. It was actually more than a breakthrough: it was an epiphany. He had been copying Sirius's Astronomy homework when it had hit him. It was weird, because he had hardly thought about the Remus mystery for days; they had been so swamped with work since their return from the Easter holidays. James and Remus had both gone home for the Easter break, so James had been unable to account for another monthly disappearance (which should have occurred somewhere right in the middle of the holiday). The mystery about Remus had moved to the back of his mind temporarily, in place of other things. But as he had sat copying the lunar phases Sirius had charted, the mystery resurfaced. He had frozen as realization shot through him. Then, abandoning his homework, he had snatched up his bag and sprinted to the library.

Once he had arrived, slightly out off breath, he headed straight for the Astronomy section and pulled out recent lunar charts. Then, a feeling of combined excitement and tension in his stomach, he had headed for the magical creatures section to pick up some books. He had only had to scan the lunar charts to realize that his epiphany had been accurate. He saw the dates he had been contemplating for months and saw what they all had in common. He had then reached slowly for one of the books he had collected. He had taken a deep breath, opened the book, and started to read.

It was here, in the library, therefore, that Sirius and Peter found their friend, twenty minutes later, on this mid April Wednesday evening with rain.

"There you are!"

James started and looked up. Sirius and Peter were standing in front of him.

"We've been looking for you for an hour!" Sirius said, falling into the seat on James's right. James looked at his watch. Twenty-eight minutes had passed since he had left them in the common room.

"Why have you been looking for me?"

"You just - took off. One minute you're sitting with us in the common room, next minute you're sprinting out the portrait hole," Peter said, taking the seat on Sirius's right.

"So you came to look for me in the library?" James asked.

"Delangela said she'd seen you here. I didn't believe her, but Peter said we should check here anyway."

"And where's Remus?" James asked.

"He had to go see Professor McGonagall about something," Sirius said carelessly, leaning backward in his chair so that it balanced on its two back legs. _Well, doesn't that work out nicely?_ "So," Sirius continued, "Are you going to tell us why you abandoned us to come here, of all places?"

James looked around cautiously, but there was no one anywhere near them. Nevertheless, he lowered his voice as he said, "I've figured it out."

Peter and Sirius exchanged confused looks. "Figured what out?" Sirius asked at his previous volume.

"Shhh!" James implored him. "I've figured out what's wrong with Remus."

Their attention captured, Sirius and Peter leaned in, Sirius's front chair legs crashing to the floor, the better to hear James's whispers.

"You have?" Peter asked, his voice awed.

"I'm pretty sure," said James, "Here, look at this." He showed them the piece of parchment on which he had been keeping a record of the dates of Remus's mysterious absences. Sirius took it and he and Peter read it.

"Yeah," said Sirius. "So?"

"So, see anything special about those dates?" James asked.

They looked back at the parchment. "They're all about a month apart," Peter said. _Congratulations,_ James thought, _now you're only three months behind me._

"Anything else?" James prompted.

"No," said Sirius shortly, looking up at him, "we don't see it, James. Why don't you just tell us what you're on about?"

James extracted a lunar chart from under his book and laid it on the table in front of Sirius and Peter. "Maybe this will help."

They examined it. James had circled the dates listed on the parchment. They looked carefully at each date. As they looked, comprehension slowly dawned on them.

"They're all…" Sirius said quietly.

"Full moons," said Peter.

"Exactly," said James. They gaped at him, unable to believe it.

"Mate," said Sirius, "you're not thinking what I think you're thinking?"

"I am," James replied. "I think that Remus is a werewolf."

The three boys sat in silence for a moment, all trying to wrap their minds around the inconceivable possibility that one of their best friends could be a werewolf. Admittedly, James had a twenty-nine minute head start on his friends for absorbing the information, but it was still difficult for him to believe, despite his certainty that it was true.

"That's impossible," Peter said finally.

"It all fits!" James insisted. He gestured at the book on werewolves that was still lying open in front of him. "It says it all here. He's always gone at the full moon. He always comes back covered in scratches and stuff. And," he continued, struck by a sudden thought, "he always looks more ill when the full moon is coming, doesn't he? He _must_ be a werewolf. How else do you explain it?"

"It fits," Sirius agreed, "But mate, do you realize what you're saying? A werewolf _here_? A _werewolf_ at Hogwarts? Do you really think Dumbledore would let a werewolf into the castle?"

"I think if any Headmaster were insane enough to do it, it would be Dumbledore," said James.

"But," said Peter tentatively, "aren't werewolves supposed to be… dangerous? I mean, he's been sleeping in our dormitory."

"But not at the full moon," said Sirius, "That was sort of James's whole point. He's not there when, you know…" He didn't finish the sentence.

"Still though," said Peter, "even when it's not full moon, aren't werewolves usually - well, you know, not very friendly," he finished awkwardly. "I mean, I've heard some stories about werewolves; they're not usually the type of wizards you want to hang around with."

James could see where Peter was coming from. He too had grown up hearing terrible stories about werewolves. They tended to be outcasts in the wizarding world: usually criminals, sometimes murderers. James could think of one werewolf in particular, Fenrir Greyback, who was notorious for his vicious savagery toward normal wizards. The mere sound of Greyback's name was enough to send a shiver of fear down any wizard's back. He looked at Sirius, and could tell by Sirius's worried expression that he was thinking along the same lines. But then, James thought about Remus.

"He's not like that," said James suddenly, "Remus. He's not like that at all. We know he's not dangerous. He's our friend. He would never hurt any of us; I know it. We _know_ him. We know we can trust him."

Sirius still looked worried, "But, _can_ we trust him?"

"Dumbledore trusts him," James pointed out, "He must. He let Remus come to school here. He wouldn't have done that if he didn't _know_ that Remus was trustworthy. If Dumbledore trusts Remus, I think we can too."

Sirius looked relieved, "Well, I suppose you're right, James."

"Yeah," Peter agreed, "I can't see Dumbledore letting him in if he were dangerous. But why didn't Remus tell us?"

"I'm not sure it's something I would go around bragging about if it were me," said James uncomfortably, "He probably thought we'd turn on him if we knew."

"But we're not turning on him?" Peter asked.

"Of course not," said James.

Sirius nodded, then said, "So what do we do now? Should we tell him that we know?"

"I think we should," said Peter. "If he's scared of us finding out because he thinks we'll hate him, he _should_ know that we know, and that we think it's okay."

"Yeah," agreed Sirius, "and that he doesn't have to pretend anymore when he's around us."

"So, it's settled then," said Peter, "We'll tell him."

Sirius nodded. James, however, was looking thoughtful.

"Isn't that a bit – boring?" he asked.

"What?" said Sirius.

"If we just _tell_ Remus that we know he's a werewolf; it doesn't seem like very much fun." James explained.

Sirius and Peter exchanged confused looks again. "What are you talking about?" Sirius asked.

"I think," James said, a mischievous grin spreading across his face, "I've got a better idea."

* * *

The following evening (which was a Thursday, no rain, but still in mid April) found Remus, Sirius, Peter, and James sitting together in the slowly emptying Gryffindor common room, working on homework. Remus was just putting the final touches on an essay about Levitation Charms for Professor Flitwick when James closed his book and leaned forward to address him.

"So, Remus," James whispered, "we're planning a little after-hours excursion later tonight. You in?"

Intrigued, Remus agreed. "Where are we going?" he asked.

James looked around as though checking for eavesdroppers, then muttered, "Later."

The four boys waited for the common room to empty completely before going up to fetch James's Invisibility Cloak. It was best this way, because even with the Cloak, it was hard for them to sneak out without drawing attention to themselves. It was just too much to hope that no one would notice the Fat Lady's portrait open and close, seemingly of its own accord. Once the last Gryffindor had wandered up to bed, Remus, Sirius, and Peter followed James up to their dormitory. They watched as James rummaged through his trunk for the Cloak.

"So, where are we headed?" Remus asked.

James looked from his trunk to grin mischievously at Remus. "If I told you _that_, then it wouldn't be a surprise, would it?" he asked.

"A surprise?" Remus repeated, as James finally managed to extract his Cloak from the bottom of his trunk. James didn't reply. He straightened up. Sirius and Peter moved closer to him so that James could throw the Cloak over all of them. Remus stayed where he was. The others turned to look at him.

"Coming?" Sirius asked, a slightly mocking smile on his face.

Remus sighed heavily and moved in. James threw the cloak over himself and his friends. Large though the Cloak was, it wasn't exactly roomy with four of them beneath it. They formed a sort of diamond shape under it: James in front, Sirius and Peter on either side of him and slightly behind, and Remus, confused and a little wary, bringing up the rear.

They made it out of Gryffindor Tower and down two staircases before they met anyone. On the fifth floor landing, they all froze at the sound of loud cackling nearby. It was coming, predictably, from Peeves, who, a second later, came soaring at them from down a corridor just off of the landing. Being unable to see them, he zoomed right past the four boys and up the stairs they had just descended without pausing, still cackling madly. From down the fifth floor corridor, they could hear the distant, heavy sound of rushing water. Remus supposed that Peeves had flooded on of the toilets back there; it would explain his good spirits.

They met no one else in the rest of the castle. They reached the bottom of the marble staircase in the Entrance Hall and headed towards the front doors.

"Where are we going?" Remus asked again.

"You'll see," James replied maddeningly.

They checked the Entrance Hall for any signs of teachers or ghosts before opening the front door a crack and squeezing out into the night. Remus noted that neither Sirius nor Peter showed any interest or curiosity in their destination. This suggested to him that they were already in on the plan for this evening's adventure. _Why would James tell them and not me?_ Remus wondered.

They headed down the front steps and across the grounds, still following James's lead. The April evening was warmer than any they had seen in six months. Remus looked up as they walked. A small smattering of clouds obscured the dark sky, but he could see the crescent moon clearly overhead. He looked back down, trying hard not to think about what would happen in just under two weeks when the moon was full again.

James led the group past the greenhouses and the vegetable garden towards the edge of the Forbidden Forest. _We're not going in there, surely,_ Remus thought. But he wasn't certain about that at all. He really wanted to ask where they were going again, but knew it would be useless. He knew full well that James would let him in on the plan when James so desired to do so, and not a minute before. They reached the edge of the forest.

"We can probably take the Cloak off now," Sirius said.

They looked around; the grounds were deserted but for the four of them. They stepped out from under the Cloak and breathed in the fresh night air. James balled up the Cloak, shoved it into his pocket, gestured to the other three to follow him, and set off along the edge of the forest. They followed him. Remus was starting to feel really anxious now, a feeling not eased when James came to an abrupt halt, looking into the trees, and muttered, "Ah ha! Here's the spot."

Remus could see a path starting at the spot where they stood that wound its way deep into the dark mass of trees. Sirius and James plunged bravely into the forest without hesitation. Peter followed just behind them, looking nervous but excited. Remus didn't move. Noticing this, the others stopped and turned around to look at him.

"Are you coming or not?" James asked.

"I…" Remus began.

"Not scared, are you, Remus?" Sirius asked. Remus couldn't see Sirius's face in the almost total darkness, but he could tell from Sirius's tone that he was smirking.

"Scared?" Remus asked, "Scared of walking alone into a dark forest in the dead of night? What on earth would give you that idea?"

"You're not alone," said James, "You're with us."

"Huge comfort," said Remus sarcastically, "I meant without a teacher."

"Teachers ruin everything," said Sirius.

"Yeah," said Peter, "We plan to actually have _fun_ tonight."

"Are you going to chicken out on us Remus?" James asked. When Remus didn't reply he said, "Come on. We're not going in that far anyway. Where's your sense of adventure?"

Remus hesitated. His fear of the forest battled with his desire for his friends to think he was cool and brave and to include him. Fear lost.

"Okay," he said, and feeling moderately braver, he followed his friend into the forest.

They had only been walking along the path for a minute or so when they reached a point where the path became wider for a short stretch, like a miniature clearing. James stopped again saying, "This should be deep enough." He pulled out his wand and turned around to face his three companions. "You should take your wands out too," he instructed them.

Remus took his wand from his pocket and raised it, intending to light it. But before he could do so, it was snatched out of his hand. Remus turned, trying to see who had taken it. Someone shoved him hard from behind and he fell face-forward onto the forest floor. Bewildered and covered in dirt, he rolled onto his back to stare up at the boy who had pushed him. James stood looking down at Remus, his wand pointed straight at Remus's chest. Peter and Sirius stood on either side of him, their wands in imitation of his. Sirius's left hand was stowing Remus's wand into the pocket of his robes.

"Did you think you could keep it a secret?" James's voice was low and menacing. Remus raised himself to his elbows and shuffled backward a few feet, looking up at James, frightened.

"Did you think we wouldn't figure it out?" demanded Sirius.

"W-What?" stammered Remus.

"Did you think we were stupid or something?" asked Peter.

They were advancing, bearing down on him. Remus shuffled backward still further, his eyes darting from angry face to angry face.

"I don't –" he stammered.

"SHUT UP!" shouted James. "We've had it with your lies Remus Lupin! You're through pretending. Did you really think you could fool us forever?"

"I don't know what – "

"SHUT UP!" James shouted again. He bent down slightly to bring his face closer to Remus's, his wand still aimed. "We know what you are."

Terror flooded every particle of Remus's body. His worst fear. His very worst fear. _This cannot be happening!_

"I can explain!" he shouted desperately.

"SHUT UP, WEREWOLF!" Sirius roared. "Didn't we tell you we were sick of your lies? Didn't we say you were through fooling us? You're finished, werewolf!"

"No – please – let me explain!" he pleaded, his voice high with panic.

"Explain!" James threw back his head and laughed insanely. "I don't think there's anything left to explain, werewolf! We know what you are now. You tried to trick us, thought you could fool us into thinking you were safe. Well I've got news for you, werewolf…"

"…we weren't fooled." Peter finished James's sentence.

"No!" Remus begged as they glared down at him, looking livid. "Please – it wasn't like that – I swear! I would never hurt any of you! I am safe!"

James laughed again. "A _safe_ werewolf? You must think we're real idiots, mustn't you?

"So what are we going to do with him?" Sirius asked, turning to James.

"Oh, I've got a few ideas," said James. His smile was malicious, evil.

"Yeah, I can think of a few things myself," said Peter, rolling up his sleeves.

Remus scrambled backward as fast as he could, still on the ground, until he hit the trunk of a large tree. He watched in terror as the boys advanced, all three wands still pointed directly at him. His breath was coming in sharp, painful gasps. There was no way out, no way to escape. His captors stood above him; each face wore the same look of mixed loathing and malicious pleasure. He cowered before them, like a trapped animal, cornered between them and the tree.

"Please!" he begged, "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Please don't hurt me!"

"I don't think begging will get you out of this one, werewolf," Sirius said harshly.

"No!" Remus cried. His eyes were starting to fill with tears. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!"

"Well you should be!" James spat, "Not that it will help you much now. You're time is over, werewolf."

"You _can't!_" Remus sobbed, "Please - let me explain – I didn't – I'm not – I –

"You're a bloody, mangy, filthy, werewolf." James's voice was low and menacing again. He moved the tip of his wand so that it was inches away from Remus's face. Remus opened his mouth, but no more words came to him. Him simply sat there, dirty, on the forest floor, staring at James, his eyes wide with terror and tears running down his cheeks. It was over. It was all over.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

James glared at him. And then, his face twitched. For the tiniest of moments, anger seemed to fade from James's face, loathing from his eyes. The corner of his mouth had been jerked involuntarily upward, as though he were fighting back a smile. He attempted to recompose himself, to recapture his furious glare, but it was too late. The next moment, he had burst out laughing.

More bewildered than ever, Remus watched as Sirius and Peter joined in with James's laughter. He was so surprised, he barely even registered the fact that all three of them had lowered their wands. They just stood there, laughing and laughing. But it was a different kind of laughter than James's earlier laughs. It wasn't malicious or insane; it was amused. James, Sirius, and Peter were all bent over double with laughter, as though they had just heard the world's funniest joke. James was clutching at his sides as though they ached with the force of his laughter. Sirius moved over to another tree nearby and leaned his back and head against it, eyes closed, laughing fit to burst. Peter just stood there, roaring with laughter, his amused and delighted eyes moving from James to Sirius to Remus and back again. Remus stayed where he was on the ground, feeling sure he must have missed something.

"I told you!" James gasped, once he had enough control over his laughter to form coherent words, "Didn't I tell you this would be much more fun?"

"You were right, James," said Sirius, wiping a tear of laughter out of his eye, still leaning against the tree, "You were right."

"And you wanted to just _tell _him, Peter," said James, turning to look at him.

"This was better," said Peter, "Much better."

"Personally, I'm surprised we were able to keep it going for so long," said James, "I was sure one of us was bound to break face early on."

"I probably could have kept it going longer if you hadn't lost it, James," said Sirius.

"I figured we should probably stop before he wet himself," said James, "I mean, we still have to walk back up to the castle under the Cloak together."

"Fair point," said Sirius, "So, should we get going then?"

"Yeah, okay," said James. He stowed his wand back into his pocket and offered his hand to Remus, who was still lying on the ground at his feet. "Want a hand?" he said politely.

Remus stared at him and didn't move. What the hell was going on? A minute ago they had been threatening his life; now they were smiling at him and James was offering to help him up. Had they gone mad? Had _he_ gone mad?

"Come on, Remus," Peter said. Remus continued to stare and didn't move.

"Remus," said James. He waved the hand he had been holding out in front of Remus's face. "Hello? Anyone in there?"

Sirius walked back over to stand at James's side again, examining Remus's blank expression. "Boy, I think we really spooked him," he said to James, then to Remus, "Come on, mate. It's okay. It was only a joke."

"A … _joke_?" Remus spluttered.

"Well, yeah," said James, as though this were obvious. "You didn't actually think that we were going to hurt you, did you?"_  
_

"Come on, Remus. We were just horsing around," said Peter.

"We'd never do anything to you, mate," said Sirius, "We're your friends."

There was a short silence. Remus looked from each of his friends' faces to the next. He was extremely confused.

"I'm confused," he admitted finally.

"Well," said Peter slowly, "James thought it would be funny if we dragged you out into the forest and pretended that we were really angry and that we were going to do you in or something."

"I thought it would be a laugh," James said, "you know, see how badly we could scare you."

"It worked too," said Sirius, "You should have seen the look on your face, Remus. It was brilliant!" He laughed again.

"Didn't think he would actually cry though," Peter said to James.

"Well we _are_ excellent actors," said James smugly.

Remus was still very confused. "So … so you _aren't_ going to hurt me?"

"Of course not!" said James, "That would be extremely rude of us!"

"And … and you're not … you're not _angry_?"

"Nope," said Sirius simply.

James extended his hand again, but Remus still didn't take it.

"I still don't understand," he said.

"Which part?" asked James.

"This was all a joke? You just did it for a laugh?"

"And it was _hilarious_!" said James happily.

"But," said Remus, "but it's not a joke."

"What do you mean?" asked Peter.

"I mean, it's not a joke; it's the truth. I really am a …" He swallowed. "A werewolf."

"Yeah, we know that, mate," said Sirius, grinning, "The joke wouldn't have worked nearly as well if we didn't know _that_."

"_I_ was the one who figured it out," James told Remus proudly.

"And … and you guys are okay with that?" Remus asked incredulously.

"Well, yeah," said James with a shrug.

Remus couldn't believe his ears. He opened his mouth to say something but couldn't think of anything to say, so he just sat there with his mouth open.

"You look surprised," Sirius observed, sounding amused.

"I …" said Remus.

"You didn't think we'd be okay with it?" James asked, sounding a little more serious.

"Not many people are," said Remus quietly.

"Well, we try to run outside of the norm," said Sirius. James and Peter laughed. Remus was feeling a bit light-headed. _They're okay with it._ It was almost too much to believe.

"So," said James cheerfully, "are you planning to spend all night down there?" He offered his hand for the third time, and Remus took it. James pulled him to his feet. Sirius took Remus's wand from his pocket and returned it to him.

"How did you guys figure it out?" Remus asked.

"Well, to be honest mate, it wasn't _that_ difficult," said James. "There are only so many relatives you can pretend to kill off before people start to get suspicious."

"I'll remember that," said Remus, brushing dirt from his robes.

"Want to head back to school then?" Peter asked.

"Not yet," said Remus.

"What do you want to do first?" asked Sirius.

"I want to push _James_ into the dirt," he said coolly. Sirius and Peter laughed.

"Err, no," said James shortly.

"It would make me feel better," argued Remus.

"Maybe tomorrow," said James.

"Excellent!" said Sirius, "We can take all the time we need then; tomorrow's Friday."

"I hope it isn't rainy," said Peter seriously, "The weather can be so unpredictable in mid April." The other three agreed.

"We really should get to bed though," said James, checking his watch, which proved completely pointless because he couldn't see it in the dark.

"Let's go then," said Sirius. Remus nodded. The four boys walked back up the forest path together. Remus was feeling oddly unreal. He had feared for many months now that his friends would discover his secret. He was sure that if or when they found out, they would abandon him instantly. _Or drag me into the forest and threaten to murder me,_ he thought wryly. The idea had been torture to him; it had been so long since he had had any friends. He couldn't bare the thought of losing his new friends; they were the best he'd ever had. But now they knew, and they hadn't abandoned him. He did think that they might have been a little more tactful in their manner of telling him though. It had been insensitive, cruel really, for them to exploit his very worst fear for a simple laugh, to make light of the curse that had ruined his life. But somehow, he couldn't quite work up the energy required to be angry. He was too busy feeling amazed and, to be honest, a little elated. _They don't care_, he thought,_ they know it doesn't make any difference. They know that it doesn't change who I am. They're not afraid of me_. It was a wonderful feeling. He felt as though a huge weight had lifted from him. The worry that had writhed uncontrollably in his stomach had vanished. He was free from the burden of tension. He might have skipped, had he not still ached from being pushed to the ground. _James and his brilliant ideas._

"So," said Sirius, bringing Remus back from his thoughts, "now that you're 'out', can we ask you some questions?"

"I suppose."

"Where do you go at the full moon?" Sirius asked. "You don't just run around the grounds, do you?"

"Of course not." He explained briefly about the Whomping Willow and the Shrieking Shack. By the time he had finished, they were out of the forest again.

"Wow," said James, as they started walking back along the edge of the trees to the castle, "they sure went through a lot of trouble."

"Dumbledore didn't want to take any risks."

"And I'll say, on behalf of all of us, that we appreciate that," said Sirius.

"Are you the first then?" asked Peter, "Are you the first werewolf ever to come to Hogwarts?"

"As far as we know," said Remus, "I didn't think I'd be able to come. I really wanted to though, so my parents wrote to Dumbledore and he said it was okay. I think he's the only Headmaster in the history of Hogwarts brave enough to let a werewolf come to the castle."

"That's what I said," said James, neglecting to mention that he had chosen the word "insane" instead of "brave".

"It's lucky he was Headmaster when you wanted to come," said Sirius.

"There's definitely something to be said for good timing," agreed Remus.

"When were you bitten?" James asked.

"When I was four."

"Blimey! So you've been a werewolf for…"

"Most of my life, yeah," said Remus.

"It must have been scary," said Peter, "If you were only four."

"I had nightmares for weeks." _And still get them sometimes now._

They were quiet for a time as they walked back past the vegetable garden and the greenhouses. Each boy was absorbed in his own thoughts.

"We should put the Cloak back on," said Sirius, once they were closer to the castle. They moved together again and James covered them in the Cloak. As they walked up to the castle together, crowded under the Cloak, another fact hit home for Remus. His friends were not hesitant to come near him. Usually, when people learned of his affliction, they would shrink away from him as though he might grow fangs and bite them at any moment. Yet here he was, squeezed between his friends under the Cloak, just as if he were anyone else. His elation increased.

"Remus, does it hurt to become a werewolf?" Sirius asked as they walked.

Remus repressed a shudder. He didn't want his friends to feel him quake. "It's awful," he said quietly.

"Is that why you always come back with all those injuries?" asked James.

"Well, sort of. The transformation itself hurts a lot, but then, once it's over, I have to eat. Since I'm always alone when I change, I end up attacking myself. Madame Pomfery can usually heal most of my injuries, but werewolf bites are cursed, so she can't heal them completely."

"That's awful," said Peter. Remus could hear pity in his voice.

"Thank you, Captain Points-Out-The-Obvious-A-Lot," said Sirius.

"Coming to you directly from 'Mr. Sensitivity'," retorted Peter.

"Nicknames!" said James excitedly. "I want to be 'The Amazing Quaffle Boy'!"

"No way," said Sirius, "your nickname has to suck just as bad as the rest of ours."

"I think his is okay," said Remus, "we can just add 'With His Head The Size Of Jupiter'." Sirius and Peter roared with laughter.

"What's Remus's going to be then?" Sirius asked.

"I've got an idea!" said James excitedly.

"Does it have the word 'werewolf' in it anywhere, perchance?" asked Remus.

"No," said James defensively, "just 'wolf'." The others laughed.

They had to stop their conversation as they entered the castle again and made their way back to Gryffindor Tower. Remus yawned; it was past two in the morning. They met no one as they ascended through the castle (though they did hear the loud cursing of the caretaker, Filch, as they passed the fifth floor landing). Once they had reached the Fat Lady, they took off the Cloak again. She started at their sudden appearance.

"How on Earth did you do that?" she asked.

"Magic," said James simply.

"Maziodyne," said Remus.

She swung forward and they climbed through and up to their dormitory.

Peter collapsed onto his bed the moment they entered the room. Sirius rummaged in his trunk for pajamas while James stowed the Cloak safely in his own trunk. Remus looked in the mirror in the corner. He was still covered in dirt. He needed bath, but he was too tired right now. He extracted pajamas from his own trunk and changed. Once James, Sirius, and Peter had done the same, James restarted their conversation.

"So, 'Once-A-Month Wolfboy', do you know the werewolf who bit you?"

"Creative name," said Sirius sarcastically.

"Well, Remus?"

Remus shook his head. "I never found out who he was."

"Git," muttered Sirius.

"It wasn't his fault," said Remus. "He couldn't control himself, no werewolf can at the full moon."

There was a short pause, and then Sirius worked up the courage to ask what they all were wondering, "Have _you_ ever bitten anyone?"

Remus couldn't suppress his shudder this time. He hoped that none of them had seen. "No," he said, "and I'm never going to, _ever._"

"Good," said James, sounding relieved.

They all climbed into bed and pulled the hangings around them.

"G'night," Peter mumbled.

"G'night," the other three replied. James, Sirius, and Peter fell asleep quickly, but Remus lay awake for a few minutes longer, thinking. He felt, at that moment, like the luckiest werewolf in the world. He was at the school of his dreams and he had the three best friends he could ever imagine. Friends, who not only accepted his difference, but liked him in spite of it. He just hoped that when morning came, he wouldn't wake to find that the whole thing had been a dream.

But Remus needn't have worried, because it had been real, the good and the bad. He did notice an unexpected change though. Last night, he had thought that his relationship with his friends had been unchanged by their discovery, a fact he had delighted in, but he was wrong. Their relationship _had_ changed. They were now closer than ever before. Now that he was, as Sirius had put it, 'out', he felt much more open around his friends. Maybe it was his new cheerfulness and openness that brought his friends closer, or maybe it was the fact that they were now in on his secret. There was something so unifying about knowing a secret with only a few others that that no one else knew. It brought all four of them closer together, the guardians of Remus's secret.

Besides the occasional werewolf comment muttered jestingly under their breath, his friends treated him just the same as ever. And when full moon came along two weeks later, even it seemed more approachable with his friends' support to help him.

"Going to visit your sick mother again?" James asked jokingly the morning before full moon,

"No," said Remus casually, "I was thinking about just hanging around here tonight, actually."

"Like hell you are," said Sirius.

"We'll be here when you get back," said Peter.

"Try not to kick your own butt _too_ hard," said James.

"It's not kicking I have to worry about."

"You know what I mean."

Remus nodded. "Thanks you guys," he said earnestly.

"Hey," said James, "that's what friends are for."

* * *

Author's Notes: The Remus-we-know-you're-a-werewolf moment has been done and done again. This was my attempt to do something different. Love it? Hate it? Reviews are always appreciated!


	2. Stupid Ideas

Author's Notes: The Traffic Graph thing on this site is so cool. It is amazing to know that people all around the world are enjoying my fic. To all of my readers (and reviewers!) from near and far, from Wisconsin to Jupiter, you are all wonderful, and I hope that you enjoy this chapter as much as the last.

Also, I wanted to give you all a little warning about the time gap. Each chapter is a glimpse into Remus's time and Hogwarts, and really each is a story in its own right. This is a chronological fic (I will not be bouncing back and forth between years like a ferret, I promise), but there will be some time gaps.

Now I will shut up and let James do the talking.

* * *

Stupid Ideas

"You look like shit."

It was Sunday afternoon and James had just returned to his dormitory after the first Quidditch practice of his Third Year to find Remus lying on his bed looking truly dreadful. Sirius and Peter were sitting on either side of the end of Remus's bed, looking concerned. Last night had been the first full moon of the term. Either James had forgotten over the summer just how awful Remus looked when he returned from his transformations, or last night's transformation had been particularly brutal. He was covered in painful looking scratches and bites, and his arm was bound up in a sling.

"I _feel_ like shit," Remus replied.

"Well," said James, smiling in spite of himself, "you know what they say: If it _looks_ like shit, and it _feels_ like shit, and…" He gave a great sniff. A truly rancid smell filled his nose. "Merlin, Remus, that's disgusting!"

"It wasn't him," said Sirius. "Peter cut one just before you came in."

"Oh, well then, never mind," said James, depositing his Quidditch gear on the floor and sitting down on Remus's bed next to Sirius. "Rough night last night, Remus?"

"Oh no," said Remus very sarcastically. "It was just rainbows and lollipops as usual."

"You're always so tetchy after full moon," James observed.

"Wonder why that is," said Remus grumpily. He adjusted himself a little on the bed and winced.

"Seriously through," said James, "you look really awful. What happened?"

Remus shrugged, wincing again. "Some times are just worse than others," he replied.

"Want us to leave you alone so you can get some rest?" Sirius asked.

"Oh, you guys don't have to leave," said Remus uncomfortably. "I mean, I don't want to kick you out of your own dormitory."

"You don't look like you're in a state to kick anything at the moment," said Sirius. "We'll leave you alone, we really don't mind. We'll come back to bother you in a few hours. That sound good?"

Remus smiled and nodded his approval. Sirius, Peter, and James all stood up and left the dormitory.

"Merlin, I've seen dead people who look better than he does right now," said James as they descended the spiral staircase.

"You have?" asked Peter.

"No, I was just making a point."

"He always looks like that after full moon," Sirius pointed out.

"That still doesn't make it okay," said James.

No, it wasn't okay. But there was nothing Sirius could do about it at the moment, so he changed the subject. "How was practice?" he asked as the three of them took seats in the common room.

"Pretty good," said James. "Brian got to go to the World Cup this summer in Japan. He got to see the best Quidditch players in the world right up close. He's worked out a whole new training program from all the stuff in learned." There was considerably more than a little jealousy in James's voice.

"A little eager though, isn't he? Starting practice the first weekend of term, I mean," said Sirius.

"Yeah, well," said James, "you know Brian. Any moment not spent playing Quidditch is a moment wasted."

"Kind of like you?" Sirius asked, grinning.

"Yeah," said James, "but even I'm not as obsessed as he is."

"I didn't think that was possible," said someone behind him standing just behind him. James turned to see his fellow third-year Delangela Narkin.

Delangela was short, blond, and opinionated. But mostly, she was just loud. Though petite, she had an attractive figure, and boys admired a similar a beautiful arrogance in her face that girls admired in Sirius's. She had long, thick hair and a voice that could be heard from halfway across the castle grounds, which she enjoyed using, particularly for gossip.

"Eaves drop much?" Sirius asked Delangela as she took a seat by the three boys.

"You're sitting in the middle of the common room and you weren't exactly whispering," Delangela snapped at him. "Fair game for eaves droppers if you ask me."

"No one asked you," said Sirius.

"No one needed to," said Delangela.

James rolled his eyes. Everyone knew that Delangela had fallen in love with Sirius from the moment she had set eyes on him. She spent half of her time with him flirting and the other half fighting. She seemed to derive equal enjoyment from both. No one was quite sure if Sirius liked her in the same way. He never reciprocated her flirtatious advances, but he appeared to have quite as much fun with their verbal sparring matches as she did.

At the moment, however, James was not in the mood to listen to them bicker/flirt, so he cut across Sirius's impending retort by asking Delangela how her summer was.

"Boring," said Delangela, a little melodramatically. "Honestly, there's nothing to do around my place in the summer."

"No one to eavesdrop on?" Sirius asked.

"Tell Delangela about your summer, Peter," James instructed.

Peter prattled for a little about his holiday in France while Delangela and Sirius had a silent glaring match. When Peter finished, Delangela asked, "So what about you, Black? How was your summer?"

Sirius shrugged. "Not all that interesting."

"You're a great conversationalist," Delangela said.

"Here's an idea: why don't you go talk to other people," Sirius suggested.

"Fine!" Delangela snapped. She stood up and stalked away.

"So, nothing at all interesting around 'The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black' this summer?" James asked Sirius once Delangela had left.

Sirius gave James a cold look for using the phrase 'The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black' and said, "Not really." He picked up a copy of _The Prophet_ that someone had left on the table near them and began to flick through it. "I mean, except for my cousin," he added unexpectedly.

"Which cousin? What about them?" asked James.

"My cousin Andromeda," Sirius said, not lowering the paper.

"I've heard of her before," said James. "She's the only one you can stand, right?"

"Yeah," said Sirius.

"What about her?" James asked.

Sirius sighed and lowered the paper, resigning to the fact the he had somehow suckered himself into telling a story about his family, a subject he usually put a lot of effort into avoiding. This was a happy story though, so he figured it was okay to continue.

"I told you Andromeda eloped last Christmas, right?" Sirius asked his friends.

"With a Muggleborn," James said, remembering.

"Right. Anyway, couple of weeks ago, her sister Narcissa went to go and try and talk some 'sense' into her."

"Narcissa," James mused. "Now is she the dark-haired, root-of-all-evil one, or the stuck up blond one who's going out with that Malfoy?"

"The stuck up blond one," said Sirius. "Well, she went over to Andromeda's new place with her husband to see if she could 'reason' with Andromeda, only to find…" Sirius trailed off.

"What?" asked James.

Sirius gave a small smile, "The baby's due in November."

"Brilliant!" James laughed. "So I guess this means Narcissa was unsuccessful?"

"Yep," said Sirius. "I think it's really cool. Andromeda's always been the only one in the family who I thought had any sense. I'm proud she married Ted; he's a great guy. And now they're having a baby and they could give crap what the family thinks."

"I suppose that would make you and Andromeda the 'Black' sheep of the family," said James, grinning.

"Very clever, James," Sirius said, his voice heavy with sarcasm. "Did you come up with that one all on your own?"

"I _did_, as a matter of fact."

They ended up hanging around in the common room for the rest of the afternoon.

When dinnertime came, they decided to go upstairs and wake Remus. This proved useless, as Remus refused to be roused. They tried determinately for a few minutes, poking him, shaking him, shouting in his ear, and tickling his foot. It was only when they heard the semi-conscious Remus emit what they were all pretty sure was a low growl that they abandoned their attempts and left for dinner without him.

"You were right," Sirius muttered to James. "He is a bit tetchy after full moon."

After eating their fill at dinner, the three boys headed back to Gryffindor Tower. They were slightly held up by James, who decided to set fire Severus Snape's pants when he wasn't looking. James had laughed himself stupid and been assigned detention by Professor McGonagall.

"Why didn't you guys wake me up?" Remus asked them when they returned to the dormitory.

"We tried, mate," said Sirius.

"You growled at us," said Peter.

Remus stared at them. "I did?"

"Yeah," said Sirius.

Remus looked very troubled by this information. "I'm sorry," he muttered to the floor.

"It's not a big deal," James assured him as he sat down on the end of Remus's bed. "How's your arm?" Remus had removed his sling since they had last seen him.

"Better," he said, stretching it a little. "Just stiff."

"We snagged you some food if you're hungry," said Sirius, holding up a doggie bag.

"Not right now," Remus said, "but thanks." Sirius set the food on Remus's bedside table. "So, did I miss anything interesting today?" Remus asked.

"If you count James setting fire to Snape's pants interesting," said Sirius.

"Why did you do that?" Remus asked James.

James shrugged. "It seemed like a good idea at the time."

Remus gave him a look rather like the one he had just received from McGonagall when she had assigned him his detention, but he didn't say anything.

"You going to be up for classes tomorrow?" Sirius asked Remus.

"I should be," said Remus, rubbing his hurt arm with his opposite hand. He looked at James. "I didn't really growl at you, did I?"

"It's not a big deal," James told him again. "Honestly."

Remus didn't looked entirely reassured, but he let the subject drop. He was eyeing the doggie bag. "There wouldn't be any chocolate in there, would there?"

"A brownie," said Peter.

Remus reached or the bag, opened it, extracted said brownie, and took a huge bite.

"Thought you weren't hungry," said James.

Remus shrugged, managing not to wince this time, and swallowed. "Chocolate has healing powers," he explained.

* * *

"Where were you yesterday, Remus?" Lily Evans asked. "I don't think I saw you once."

"I wasn't feeling well."

"I'm sorry," she said, sounding genuinely sorry. "Are you feeling better today?"

"Yes, much."

"Then why aren't you eating?" Lily asked. It was breakfast, and the four boys were seated toward the end of the long table with Lily Evans and Delangela Narkin. They were munching on bacon, scrambled eggs, and toast. All except Remus.

"He's full," Sirius explained. "This morning he binged on my whole stash of chocolate frogs I saved from the train last week. Every last frog."

"You said I could have them," Remus pointed out. "You offered them to me."

"I didn't think you would eat them all."

"You said that I could have as many as I like."

"I didn't know you'd fancy _all_ of them. There had to have been twenty frogs left."

"Eighteen," said Remus, repressing a belch.

"That's a lot of frogs," said Delangela.

"See," said Sirius, gesturing to her, "she agrees with me. You'd better have at least saved me the cards."

"I did, but it's nobody you don't already have."

"What do we have first today?" Peter asked.

"Transfiguration," said Lily, without bothering to take out her schedule.

"One week into the year and you've already got your schedule memorized," said James. "Try to be more of a nerd, Evans."

"Try to be more of a git, Potter."

James's response was lost to a loud belch from Remus. "Excuse me," he said, reddening.

"That's what you get for eating half your weight in someone else's frogs."

"Oh, forget it, Black," said Delangela. "You can always get more frogs when we go to Hogsmeade."

They spent the rest of breakfast discussing their plans for their very first trip to Hogsmeade. So happily anticipated was the trip that they were still discussing it when they arrived their first hour Transfiguration class.

"I can't wait to get inside Zonko's," Sirius said as they sat down and took out their books.

"Zonko's products," said Delangela, rolling her eyes. "Right, Black, that's exactly what you need: more reasons to get detention."

"Where do you want to go in Hogsmeade?" Peter asked Lily and Delangela.

"Well, I think it'd be pretty interesting to go see the Shrieking Shack," said Lily.

"Oh yeah!" Delangela said excitedly. "It's supposed to be really haunted, the villagers have been hearing screams and yells from inside there for a few years now." Facing Peter, neither she nor Lily saw Remus reddening again.

"Imagine that," said Sirius, trying not to smile. Remus kicked him under the desk.

"I love haunted houses," Lily said, unaware of any awkwardness in the conversation. "My sister and I used to go haunted houses every Halloween. She always got scared, but I thought they were really fun. But they were just pretend haunted houses, you know, Muggle-made. I can't wait to see a real haunted house."

"Just so long as whatever's haunting it doesn't jump out and bite you," said Sirius, earning himself another kick.

Just then, Professor McGonagall entered the classroom and they started the lesson. Sirius was only half paying attention. She was teaching them about Animagi this week. He thought it was cool when she transformed herself into a cat right before their eyes, but then she went into a long lecture about the principles behind the Animagus transformation, and Sirius lost interest. He took out a spare piece of parchment and drew up a game of hangman.

"James," he whispered.

James ignored him.

"James," he whispered again, poking James with the end of his quill.

"Leave me alone Sirius, I trying to listen," James whispered.

Sirius was shocked. James _never_ paid attention in class on lecture days; he didn't need to. It wasn't until then that Sirius noticed that James was taking notes.

"What are you doing?!" he hissed at James.

"I'm taking notes," James replied.

"Why?"

"Shhhh," James whispered impatiently. He was hanging on Professor McGonagall's every word.

Extremely confused by his best friend's odd behavior, Sirius let James be, turned to his other side, and attempted to engage Remus in his hangman game. As Remus was also trying to pay attention and was still angry at Sirius for his leading comments to Lily and Delangela about the Shrieking Shack, he was just as unsuccessful with Remus as he had been with James, and was reduced to crumpling up his hangman game and doodling for the rest of the hour.

"So what's the deal?" Sirius asked once the lesson had ended and they were packing up their bags.

"Deal?" James asked distractedly.

"Are you trying to suck up to McGonagall, or are you just enthralled by Animagi, or what?" Sirius asked.

"It was an interesting lesson," said James.

Sirius had the impression he was missing something, but decided to let it go, "If you say so."

James was distracted for the entire rest of the day. He seemed to be compensating for his unusual attentiveness in Transfiguration by paying even less attention than he normally would in all of his other classes that day. He barely touched his lunch and didn't even make it to dinner. He disappeared sometime after last period Defense Against the Dark Arts, and though his friends waited in the Great Hall until the end of dinnertime, James failed to turn up.

"He did have detention tonight," said Remus, looking around at the almost empty Hall they were still sitting in.

"Not this early," said Sirius, checking his watch. "His detention wouldn't start until after dinner."

"You'd think he'd want some food before he had to go," said Remus. "Was it just me, or was James acting very oddly today?"

"I thought James was acting strange today," said Peter, "Did you guys notice that he was taking notes in Transfiguration?"

"Maybe he just wants to get more serious about his studies?" Remus suggested.

"Or he could be losing his marbles," said Sirius.

"We'll just have to ask him after his detention," said Peter.

* * *

_I must not set fire to other peoples' pants. I must not set fire to other peoples' pants._

James sat in Professor McGonagall's office copying these words over and over (occasionally omitting the "not"; like she was going to read it anyway). He was deciding how best to approach her with a question without making her suspicious. He checked his watch; it was twenty to the hour. Now was as good a time as ever.

"Err, Professor?"

Professor McGonagall looked up from the papers she was grading. "Yes, Potter?"

"I was just thinking about your lesson on Animagi. It was really interesting. I wondered if maybe… if I wanted to learn more… if you could recommend some titles for me?"

Professor McGonagall's eyebrows contracted. "Are you genuinely interested in Animagi, Potter, or are you trying to get out of detention early?"

"I'm genuinely interested," he said earnestly. Then he brightened a little. "But – I mean – if you wanted to let me out early…"

"You can go at the end of the hour," she told him sternly. "But I will recommend some books for you if you really want to learn more."

"Actually, Professor, there was one specific question I had."

"Fire away."

"Well…" James hesitated. He pondered how he could phrase his question in such a way that he would get the information _he_ needed, without giving _her_ too much information. "I was just wondering, say there's something… something that's only a danger to humans, would… would you be, err, safe from that something if you were a cat?"

"What sort of something?"

_Like a werewolf sort of something._ "Like – I don't know – something that could only hurt people, not animals. Would an Animagus be safe, err, around it?"

"I would say, as a general rule, yes. But without knowing the specifics, it's hard to know for sure."

"Oh," said James, his heart sinking a little. …_hard to know for sure… _Did he dare mention werewolves? He decided it was too risky. "Okay, err, thanks Professor." He returned to his lines. He thought he sensed Professor McGonagall watching him for a minute longer, but she didn't say anything. She continued grading her papers.

At the end of the hour, she told him he could go.

"Good night, Professor," he said as he headed for the door.

"Potter?"

He looked back. "Yes?"

"Did you want this list or not?" She was holding out a slip of parchment on which she had written half a dozen book titles.

"Yes," he said gratefully, walking back to her and taking the list. "Thank you, Professor."

"You're welcome, Potter." He was halfway to the door when she called him back again. "Potter."

He turned to she her reading the lines he had left lying on the table. "You seemed to have missed a word here and there," she said.

"Oh, did I?" James asked innocently. "I'm sorry."

She shook her head in an exasperated fashion, but James could have sworn that she was smiling slightly. "Good night, Potter."

"Good night, Professor."

James left the office, examining the list McGonagall had given him. The library would probably be closed at this time, so James would have to wait until the next day to search for the titles she had recommended. As he still had the books he had gotten after dinner to look though, he decided just to head straight to Gryffindor Tower.

In the common room he was confronted by Peter, Sirius, and Remus. He shook them off by saying he was really tired and went up to the dormitory. He changed into pajamas, got his books and his wand, climbed into his four-poster, and drew the hangings around him. By the light of his wand, he began studying Animagi. Later, when his roommates came up to bed, James feigned sleeping noises until he was sure the others were settled in. He was up later than anyone else in his dormitory, turning pages as quietly as possible.

* * *

For the next three days, James proved just as distracted and elusive as on Monday. He used class time to gaze dreamily off into space, he used mealtimes to go to the library, and he used evenings to read as much as he could while trying to hide from his friends. It wasn't that he wanted to avoid them, but he wasn't ready yet to share his idea with them.

Consequentially, his friends couldn't get a word from him about what he was up to. Most every time they spotted James in the next few days, he had his nose deep in a book. They spent their class time wondering what James was thinking about (and studying), they spent their mealtimes speculating on what evil, book-loving force had possessed James (and eating), and they spent their evenings searching for James (and doing homework, hanging in the common room, etc. - their whole lives didn't revolve around James after all).

Thursday evening, Sirius, Remus, and Peter returned to the common room after a wasted hour of combing the castle for their elusive friend.

"Honestly," Sirius said as they climbed back through the portrait hole, "there are only so many places he could be in this castle. Where's he hiding?

"Looking for Potter?"

Sirius started and turned to the girl who had spoken.

"I thought I told you not to eavesdrop anymore," Sirius told Delangela.

"Fine," she said, "I guess I _won't_ tell you where he is." She started to walk away.

"Wait!" Remus said. Delangela turned back. "Have you seen him?" Remus asked.

"He's in the library," Delangela said.

"Ha ha, very funny, Del," Remus said sarcastically, "Where is he really?"

"I'm not joking," she said, "he's in the library."

She walked away. Remus stared confusedly after her while Sirius rounded on Peter.

"Peter, are you a vampire?" Sirius asked.

"What?" Remus and Peter asked together.

"Are you a vampire?" Sirius asked Peter again.

"No," said Peter.

"Are you sure?"

"I think I would know!"

"Sirius, what are you on about?" Remus asked.

"I want to know why James is in the library," said Sirius.

"So do I," said Remus. "I didn't think he even knew where the library was. But what does this have to do with Peter being a vampire?"

"James knows where the library is," said Sirius, "but he's only been there once before. It was the night he discovered that a certain _someone_ - I'm not saying who - but that _someone _was a certain type of Dark Creature and that was why that _someone_ was gone every full moon."

"Very cryptic," said Remus.

"So," continued Sirius, "if James is in the library, it makes sense that he's made a similar discovery. I know that _I'm_ not a magical creature of any type, James is the one in the library, and we already know about _you_, so that leaves Peter."

"Well when you use that kind of logic," said Remus, rolling his eyes.

"Why a vampire though?" asked Peter.

"Why not a vampire?" asked Sirius.

"Again with the logic," said Remus.

"I'm not a vampire, Sirius."

"Are you any other kind of magical creature?"

"No."

"Hiding anything?"

"No."

"What about you?" Sirius asked Remus. "Any other secrets you want to fill us in on?"

"Yes," said Remus. "I'm a vampire."

"Really?" asked Peter.

"No."

"Well then," said Sirius, "I guess there's only one thing left to do."

"To the library?"

"To the library!"

And so they went to the library. James wasn't there.

"So, Narkin was lying?" asked Sirius.

"I knew it couldn't be true," said Remus. "You just don't hear the words 'James Potter' and 'library' in a sentence together."

"James Potter?" asked a boy sitting at a nearby table, looking up from his work.

"You've seen him?" Sirius asked the boy.

"He left about ten minutes ago."

"Damn," Sirius whispered. "Back to the common room then?"

"To the common room!" said Peter.

"You'd think we'd have run into him on the way down," Remus said as left the library and headed back to the common room.

"Maybe he found a new shortcut," said Sirius.

James wasn't in the common room, so they went to check the dormitory. The hangings were drawn around James's bed and they could hear his slow, sleepy breathing.

"Reckon he's asleep, or faking again?" Sirius asked.

"We could wait to hear a page turn," Remus suggested.

"Look," said Peter, pointing at James's bedside table. His glasses were sitting on it. The absence of his glasses on the table had been a clue to what James had _actually_ been doing in bed for the past three nights.

"So he's sleeping?" asked Remus.

"Let's find out," said Sirius. He went over to James's bed and pulled back the hangings. James was very clearly in a deep sleep.

"Should we wake him?" Sirius asked the other two.

"No," said Remus. "We'll talk to him tomorrow."

* * *

James effectively avoided his friends for most of the next day. He missed breakfast, lunch, and dinner (don't worry, he wasn't starving himself; he made regular trips to the kitchens to get food from the house elves). He never offered them the opportunity to talk to him between or during classes. It wasn't until after dinner that they thought they had any chance of talking to him.

"Where should we check first?" Peter asked as they deposited their bags in the common room.

"Let's check the dormitory," said Remus.

"He won't be up there," said Sirius. "That's much too obvious."

"He probably isn't up there," said Remus. "But we're all going to feel really stupid if we search the entire castle for him and then find out he was in the dormitory the whole time."

"Fair enough," said Sirius.

They went up to the dormitory. Remus had been right to suggest they check there. They opened the door and walked in to find James sitting on his bed reading a thick and very old looking library book. About a dozen more equally thick and old looking books sat in a stack on the end of his bed. James was so deeply amerced in his book, he didn't even seem to realize that he was no longer alone.

Sirius walked straight over to James, snatched his book away from him, and slammed it shut.

"Hey-"

"Alright, bookworm, that's enough," Sirius said, as Remus and Peter took seats on Remus's bed, which was next to James's. "You've been avoiding us for days and every time we turn around you've got your face stuck in a bloody book. We want to know what you're on about!"

James was trying to take his book back from Sirius. "You lost my page, you prat!"

Sirius read the front cover of the book before throwing it back at James. "_Tales of the Animagi._" He strode to the end of James's bed and began to sift through the pile of books there, reading their titles aloud as he did. "_A Beginners Guide to Animagi, The Animagi Chronicles, Man and Beast: A Study of Animagi, Animagi Throughout the Ages, Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About_ – wait for it – _Animagi, Becoming an Animagus_-"

"I'm sensing a theme," Remus mused.

Sirius continued with the pile, "- _My Life as an Animagus, The Diaries of Animagi, Regulations and Bi-Laws of the Animagus Transformation, The Creature Within: A Complete Guide to Animagi Magic, Animagi for Dummies, Ways of the Animagi,_ and _The Many Dangers of Werewolves_." Sirius looked up at James, turning the last book over in his hands. Behind him, Remus wore a very hurt expression. Sirius said, "Interesting reading choices. Care to explain?"

James threw an apologetic look a Remus before taking _The Many Dangers of Werewolves_ from Sirius and starting to explain. "Well, you know in class when McGonagall was telling us about Animagi? I thought it sounded really interesting, what she was saying, and-"

"Is that why you were paying attention in class?" Sirius asked. "Because you're seriously interested in Animagi? Thank goodness; I thought you were losing your marbles."

Ignoring Sirius, James continued, "And I came up with this idea, and… I didn't know if it would work, so I went to the library to get these books, and… well, I found this." He opened _The Many Dangers of Werewolves_ to a page he had marked earlier by sticking a small piece of torn parchment between the pages and read allowed, "_The werewolf, however, though a danger to humans, does not present as severe a threat to fellow beasts. Werewolf packs will, on occasion, hunt other animals for sport, but the lone wolf seldom prefers the taste of any blood but that of humans. In the rare event a werewolf does bite an animal, the bite will not curse the creature as it would a human. Lycanthropy came only be passed from person to person._" James looked up at his friends to see them all watching him uncomprehendingly.

"James, _I_ could have told you that," said Remus, still looking a little hurt.

"What's lycanthropy?" Peter asked.

"It means werewolfismness," said Sirius.

"Oh."

"What does that have to do with Animagi?" Sirius asked James.

"Listen to this," said James, putting down _The Many Dangers of Werewolves_ and reaching for the book he had been reading when they had come in, _Tales of the Animagi_. "This book has first hand accounts from Animagi over the last few centuries. This is from a woman who could turn into a bear: _One night, as I ventured through the woods by the light of the full moon, I found myself in the midst of another part-human part-animal: a werewolf. My immediate reaction was that of fear, but the creature did not attempt to harm me. Once assured of my safety, I journeyed with him into the night. He made no attempt to bite me or drive me away, but seemed to appreciate my company. Not until we had reached the edge of the wood and saw a human did he become violent. I managed to hold the werewolf away from the human to give him time to flee. Once we were alone again, his violence subsided, and he was peaceful once more. I imagine that the creature benefited from having a part-human companion with him that night, it seemed to bring out his own human side, despite the full moon._" James looked up again. Peter still looked confused. Remus looked stricken. Sirius, however, was smiling.

"Brilliant," he told James.

"What's brilliant?" Peter asked.

"Don't you see, Peter? We could become Animagi!" said Sirius. "Then we could turn into animals. We could be with Remus at the full moon!"

Peter's mouth fell open. Remus was giving Sirius a very cold look. "That," Remus said, "is the stupidest idea I've ever heard."

"What about the idea I had last year about blowing up the girls' toilet on the third floor?" asked Sirius. "We smelled like poo for a week."

"Yeah," said James, "or what about my idea to put itching powder in Snivellus's pants?"

"And he got the wrong pants," said Peter.

"Or Peter's idea to put a permanent sticking charm on Cal Hornbee and his teddy bear?"

"Or Sirius's slightly modified version of Peter's idea where we put a permanent sticking charm on Cal Hornbee's hand and his-"

"Oh yeah! I forgot about that," laughed Sirius. "Lucky for him that idea never came to anything."

"And what about James's idea to eat the fuzzy Beatie Bott's Every Flavor Bean on the train ride here?" asked Peter.

"That was revolting," said Sirius, sticking out his tongue in disgust.

"Okay," said James, "but what about your idea to use the Invisibility Cloak to peep in the girls dormitory?"

"How was I supposed to know the stairs would melt into a slide and we would fall on our asses?" asked Sirius. "What about your genius idea to go vine swinging from the branches of the Whomping Willow?"

"I maintain that idea would have been fun," said James stubbornly.

"Yes, well, those of us who _don't_ have a death wish maintain that it would have been stupid," said Sirius, equally as stubborn.

"Okay, but what about when you wanted to set a crate of tarantulas lose in the Transfiguration classroom?" James countered. Peter shuddered.

Sirius grinned mischievously, "McGonagall would have gone mental."

"She would have," James agreed, smiling as well. "Hey, remember my idea to put a freezing charm on Snivellus's pants?"

"That one you followed through on," said Peter.

"I know," said James, a reminiscent gleam in his eyes, "it was brilliant."

"Remember my idea to leave treacle tarts with Dung Bombs concealed in them in the Slytherin Quidditch team's locker room?" asked Peter.

"They'd have had to have been stupid enough to eat them," James pointed out.

"The collective brain power of the Slytherin Quidditch team isn't enough to power a hiccup charm," said Sirius.

"Remember my idea to set fire to Snivellus's pants?" asked James.

"Yeah," said Sirius, "I've been meaning to ask you about that, James: what is it with you and Snivellus Snape's pants?"

James flashed a wicked smile. "Maybe if we ruin enough pairs of Snivellus's pants, he won't have any left. Then we can hang him by his ankles so that his robes fall down and we can show the whole school his underpants."

"That would never work," said Sirius.

"Well now I have to do it just to prove you wrong."

"Remember my idea to kidnap Mrs. Norris?" asked Sirius.

"I still have the scratch marks," said James and Peter together.

Then, James said, "What about the idea I came up with in first year? You know, the one with the Filibuster Fireworks and the Bubble-Blowing Charm and the Fizzing Whizzbees and the muggle wrench and the purple loufa and-"

"ALRIGHT! ALRIGHT!" Remus shouted exasperatedly, bringing an abrupt end to the completely irrelevant 'stupid ideas' tangent. "Maybe it's not _the_ stupidest idea I've ever heard, but that doesn't make it a good idea."

"Oh, come on, Remus," said James, sliding his feet to the floor to sit on the edge of his bed, "it's a great idea. We become Animagi, then we can hang out with you at full moon and-"

"And how completely mental do you have to be to want to 'hang out' with a werewolf at full moon? _I_ don't want to 'hang out' with me at full moon!"

"But you don't like being alone at the full moon either," James pointed out.

"No," Remus admitted, "but it's better that way. It's safe."

"Safe is boring," whined Sirius.

"Maybe when the only thing you have to gamble is detention," Remus snapped. "The game's a little different when you're risking being bitten!"

"But you wouldn't bite us, we'd be animals!"

"That doesn't mean I couldn't hurt you!" Remus shouted. Do you think I would ever forgive myself if I…if I…" He put his elbows on his knees and buried his face in his hands. The others watched him but didn't say anything. None of them were ready to abandon James's idea, but they didn't want to make Remus upset. They exchanged looks, silently begging one another to break the awkward silence. Oddly enough, it was Remus who spoke first.

"And anyway," he said, raising his head, trying to recapture his calm, reasonable mien, "you can't become Animagi until you're of age, and transformation takes years, it wouldn't do any good."

"You can't _register_ as an Animagus until you're of age," said James. "There's a difference."

"It's _illegal_ to become an Animagus without registering."

"That's less important to us than you might think," said Sirius with a grin.

"You're mental," Remus told him flatly.

"Thank you for noticing," said Sirius.

"I'm not joking," said Remus, "I really think this is a terrible idea."

"Well," said James brightly, "it's a good thing we don't need your permission then."

"I…but I'm the one you'd be doing it for!"

"Still don't need your permission," said James.

James and Sirius had clearly lost their grip. Remus needed an ally.

"What do you think about this, Peter?"

Peter looked extremely uncomfortable at having to pick a side. He normally followed along with whatever the others were doing and agreed with what they said. He therefore had a real issue when his friends divided. What if he sided with the wrong friend? Would the others not like him anymore?

After a minute of internal struggle, Peter decided that it would make him look cooler if he sided with rebellion over reason. "I agree with James and Sirius."

Remus wasn't going to give in that easy. "Do you know how hard it is to become a Animagus? Do you know how dangerous it is?" He directed his words at Peter alone now. The other two were lost causes, but Peter he could scare. "What if something went wrong?" he continued, "You could get hurt. And even if nothing went wrong with the transformation, do you really fancy hanging around with a werewolf at full moon? What if I bit you? What if I attacked you? Even if I can't pass my curse to you, I could still hurt you. Do you want to put yourself in that kind of danger? And what if the Ministry found out? Do you know what the punishment is for being an unregistered Animagus? Azkaban, that's what. Do you want to go to Azkaban?"

"No," said Peter in a small voice.

"Do you what to put yourself in danger?"

"No, I…" He turned to James and Sirius. "Maybe this isn't such a good idea."

"Ah come on, Peter," said James. He got up from his bed to sit on Remus's on Peter's other side and put an encouraging arm around Peter's shoulders. "You're not going to wimp out on us are you? You're in Gryffindor! You're not afraid of a little trouble! And besides, nothing bad is going to happen; you'll be with us. Me and Sirius will help you with the transformation and we can protect you from the big, scary werewolf. We would never let anything bad happen to you! Don't you trust us?"

"I…" said Peter, not quite sure where he was going.

"James can't promise you that Peter," said Remus. "He can't promise nothing bad will happen. Think of the consequences, Peter."

"Think of the benefits, Peter," said James.

"Yeah," said Sirius, "think about how cool it would be."

"Don't listen to them Peter," said Remus. "Don't let them pressure you into doing something you don't want to do."

"You're pressuring him as much," James snapped at Remus, then said to Peter, "Don't let Remus talk you out doing something fun."

_Why can't they just argue with each other?_ Peter thought miserably. _Why do they have to argue through me?_

"Be reasonable, Peter."

"Be brave, Peter. Be cool, Peter."

"Don't be a fool, Peter."

"Don't be lame, Peter."

"Listen to _me_, Peter."

"Don't listen to Remus, Peter."

"I…" Peter stammered, looking back and forth between Remus's concerned frown and James's encouraging smile. "I don't…I don't… I don't…"

"Oh great," said James, jumping up from the bed and gesturing dramatically at Peter, "look what you've done to him, Remus. You've terrified him! He can't even speak!"

"Look what _I've_ done to him?" said Remus, standing up to face James. "Look what _I've_ done to him? You're the one trying to talk him into something that could get him killed!

"Why are you so set on this?" Remus demanded of James loudly. "Why do you want to do something when you know damn well you could get hurt? You _know_ the danger you'd be in! You know you'd be breaking the law! Why am I having to talk you out of something you already _know_ is completely mental? Why do want to do something so stupid?"

"Because it's the only thing I can think of!" James yelled.

"The only – what are you talking about?"

"I'm sick of it!" James burst out.

"Sick of what?"

"I'm sick of seeing you after full moon looking like you've been to Hell and back! I'm sick of seeing you miserable and knowing there's nothing I can do about it! We're friends; friends are supposed to help each other. You're suffering and I'm sick of having no way to help you! I'm sick of it! I want to do something, and since I not on the verge of finding a cure for werewolf bites, this was the only thing I could think of. And, no, it's not perfect, but it's better…it's better than doing nothing. Even if it only helps a little, it's better than doing nothing."

A mildly awkward pause followed this rather touching outburst. James's sudden heartfeltness had taken all of them by surprise. Remus could think of nothing to say. What did you say to something like that?

James seemed to deflate a little in the silence. "If you don't want us to do it, we won't," he said defeated tone.

Another pause, and then, "You guys would do that, just to help me?"

"Well, there are other benefits to being an Animagus, I'd imagine," said Sirius, trying to lighten the mood.

"Yeah," said Peter, "like being able to turn into an animal whenever you want."

"And Captain Points-Out-The-Obvious-A-Lot strikes again," said Sirius.

Remus ignored Sirius and Peter and spoke to James, "Are you sure you want to do this?"

"Positive."

"And you?" Remus asked Sirius.

"'Course."

"And you too, Peter?"

Peter shifted a little where he sat, "Yeah, okay."

And Remus made his decision. "Well," he said matter-of-factly, "I suppose if you guys are going to try this, and _not_ get yourselves killed, you're going to need all the help you can get. I'm in."

"YES!" James punched a fist into the air in victory.

"So where do we start?" asked Sirius.

The four of them crammed onto James's bed as James began explaining all of the research he had done already, and how far they still had to go. The project ahead of them was daunting, but exciting. Remus listened, determined to make it his personal responsibility to insure that none of his friends were harmed.

After all, with an idea this stupendously wonderful and unbelievably stupid, _what could possibly go wrong?_

* * *

Author's Notes: Be sure to check out my thrilling sequel, _Peter Pettigrew: Vampire!_

Just kidding!

I write long chapters! Please write a review!


	3. Potential Death by Spherical Snow

Set in winter of the Maruaders' third year

Note: In this chapter, James does not go to the library.

* * *

Potential Death By Spherical Snow

"Ready…aim…FIRE!"

It was the epic snow battle to top all snow battles before it. It was a wet, white war to make all other wars kneel before it. It was a coming-of-age for those young men and women who proved themselves to be of noble aim and courageous heart in the face of potential death by spherical snow. It was torment for those who had joined in the beginning, but were now cowering in fright as the battle became fiercer. For everyone in between, it was a fantastic day spent out on the castle grounds, freezing, perhaps, but also having to time of their lives.

It was what it was: a massive snowball fight.

"DUCK!" Remus yelled. He launched himself at Peter to pull him down out of harm's way as a massive amount of snowballs soared straight for Peter's head. The snowballs missed them, but they ended up toppling right into a snowdrift that had formed in the middle of the Gryffindor snow fort. Remus extracted himself from the drift then lent a hand to Peter. "Sorry about that, mate," he panted.

Behind them, Sirius and James were laughing so hard that they didn't even notice the two meteor-like snowballs heading straight for them. James was hit in the shoulder, but Sirius took one right to the face. Sirius was hit so hard he actually fell over himself. As James ran off to seek revenge on the Ravenclaw boy whose snowball had hit him, a group of about a dozen girls swooped down on Sirius.

"Are you okay, Sirius?"

"Let me help you."

"Let _me_ help you, Sirius."

"Where does it hurt?"

Sirius patted his cheek where the snowball had hit him. "He hurts a bit right here," he said, with a handsome grimace of imaginary pain. "Maybe if you ladies were to kiss it, it would hurt a bit less."

The girls broke into a chorus of high-pitched giggles and started taking turns kissing Sirius's cheek. Remus snorted; only a boy who looked like Sirius Black could get away with a line that cheesy.

"Lupin!" someone behind him shouted. Remus took the hint and ducked just in time to avoid a new massive hail of snowballs.

"Thanks, Hayden," Remus called, straightening up to smile at his savior, Roy Hayden, his fellow third-year. Hayden gave Remus a quick wave before rushing away to throw snowballs towards the Hufflepuff fort.

Remus started to gather some snow to make his own snowball. Not far away, Sirius was still surrounded by giggling girls.

"Come on ladies, up you get!" shouted sixth-year Greg Bennet, who was acting as leader of the Gryffindor forces, trying to shoo the girls back up to the offensive line. "Black is fine. We need more people out in the field!"

"Oh shut it, Bennet," Sirius said. Bennet stormed away. A few girls followed, but some still had to get in their kiss. Last in the kiss queue was Delangela Narkin. "Not you, Narcosis," Sirius said.

"Oh, don't worry, Black," Delangela said. "I'm not here to kiss you." She smacked him across the face. "That was for that amusing little trick you played on me yesterday!" she shouted and stalked off.

"That was harsh," said Remus, offering a hand to help Sirius off the ground.

"Well, he kind of deserved it," said James, reappearing at Remus's shoulder. "Did you hear what he did to her yesterday?"

"Do I want to hear?" Remus asked.

"Probably not," said James.

"Potter! We need you back out in front!" Bennet called.

"Alright, alright, keep your pants on, I'm coming!" James called back. He dashed away.

"Where'd Peter get to?" Sirius asked.

Remus looked around. "I'm not sure."

"Let's rejoin the fight," Sirius said.

"I'm right behind you," said Remus. They ran back to the front of the fort to lob snowballs over the wall. Remus was debating whether he should tell Sirius that he had lipstick smudges on his cheek or let Sirius go through the rest of the battle with "Very Berry" war paint. The latter was more tempting.

They had a great view of the warfare from their position at the front of the fort. The Gryffindor fortress was closest to the castle. Just to the south, closer to the lake, was the headquarters of the Ravenclaw snow forces. To the northwest was the Hufflepuff hideout. Remus observed that the three massive forts form an almost perfect equilateral triangle, then mentally hit himself for thinking about math on a Sunday when he wasn't even doing homework. He also observed that Slytherin House still had a total representation of zero. The Slytherins, it appeared, considered themselves above snowball wars with members of other Houses, but, as James had pointed out earlier, no one from the other Houses really wanted the Slytherins there anyway.

Sirius, Remus, James, and Peter had been out in the battle from the very beginning a few hours ago, when it had only been a tiny snowball fight. It had escalated far beyond expectations, and the Marauders were loving every minute of it. The only trouble was, where in the beginning Gryffindor had held a strong lead, Ravenclaw was pulling farther and farther ahead with each passing minute.

"How you guys holding up?" James asked, sprinting up to join them.

The words were barely out of his mouth when Greg Bennet appeared behind him, followed closely by James's Quidditch captain, Henry Brian.

"It's no good," Brian was saying to Bennet. "They're too well organized. We can only hold then off for so long. I think it's only a matter of time before Hufflepuff caves, and then Ravenclaw can use its full force to take us down too. We need a new plan."

"Maybe we should just surrender now," Bennet sighed.

"Gryffindors _don't_ surrender," James said firmly to Brian and Bennet.

"Potter, in case you haven't noticed, it's only a matter of time before we get creamed," said Bennet. "We should just quit now with good grace before Ravenclaw can humiliate us to badly."

"Gryffindors _don't_ take the easy way out," James said. "Gryffindors are _brave_. Gryffindors fight 'til last man is down!"

"That's very nice sentiment, James," Brian said. "But unless you have any suggestions as to how we can turn the battle in our favor…"

"We could form an alliance with Hufflepuff," James said. "You were right with what you said before: Ravenclaw will crush Hufflepuff and then come for us. Neither of us can take on Ravenclaw individually, but we would be stronger if we joined together."

"You know what, Potter," said Bennet, "that idea's not half bad."

"Of course it's not," said James. "_I_ came up with it."

Henry Brian rolled his eyes. He had, of course, dealt with James, ah, "big-headed tendencies" in Quidditch practice, but he never ceased to be amazed at just how far James would go to compliment himself. "So we'll do it then?" Brian asked Bennet. "We'll join up with Hufflepuff?"

Bennet sighed again. "Well, I guess we don't have much choice."

"How do we go about this then?" Brian asked Bennet. It was James, however, who answered him.

"We send envoys," James explained. "We send a couple of guys over to Hufflepuff, and they can offer our proposition."

"Okay, but who should we send?" Brian asked.

"I'll go," James said.

"No, Potter, we need you," Bennet said. "You're one of our best men. We can't afford to spare you."

"Well, in that case, send Remus," James said. "His aim is truly pathetic."

"You know, the thing I like most about being friends with you, James, is the wonders you do for my self-esteem," said Remus.

"But," James continued, "while his aim might be lousy, he's good talking compromise and stuff."

"Okay, Lupin, you go," Bennet said.

"By myself?"

"I'll go with you," Sirius offered. "I'll help you persuade Hufflepuff. I'm told I can be quite charming." He flashed a wide smile.

Brian snorted. Bennet rolled his eyes. "Fine, Black," Bennet said, "you and Lupin go. Make sure no one sees you crossing the no-man's land; you'll be buried alive in snowballs if they do. And try not to get yourselves taken hostage either. I don't need to be sparing more men to go get you out of trouble, okay?"

"Trouble?" Sirius asked, his eyes wide and innocent. "Oh no, of course not. We'd never get into trouble." And with that, he and Remus headed off, leaving Brian to snort again, Bennet to recommence barking orders, and James to laugh so hard he nearly peed himself.

Instead of crossing right through the no-man's land, Remus and Sirius decided to circle around to the back of the Hufflepuff, taking a longer but safer route, as neither of them had any desire to be buried alive in snowballs. The untouched snow was up to their waists, so they pulled out their wands to melt themselves a path, ducking low behind the walls of the path to ensure extra protection.

Hufflepuff was crumbling. Most of their forces seemed to have fled back to the castle to sip hot chocolate in front of their common room fire. The remaining forces were falling to the vicious snow warfare of Ravenclaw. No attacks were coming from the Gryffindor fort. Apparently, Bennet and Brian had passed on the message that they were attempting an alliance.

As they approached, Remus and Sirius stowed their wands and prepared to enter peacefully.

"GRYFFINDOR INVASION!"

They had been spotted. _Crap._

"We come in peace!" Remus shouted as fifty or so Hufflepuffs raised snowballs, ready to fire straight at him and Sirius. The two Gryffindors held up their hands in a gesture of surrender.

"Yeah right!" shouted a fourth-year girl.

"No, we really do come in peace," Sirius assured her.

"SPIES!"

"SNEAKS!"

"ENEMIES!"

_Crap._

"What's going on here?" A tall seventh-year boy with dark hair was pushing his way though the sea of Hufflepuffs with their snowballs at the ready. "What are you doing? We're supposed to be fighting Ravenclaw, not…" He broke off as he spotted Sirius and Remus.

"We come in peace!" Remus repeated.

"What are you doing here?" the dark-haired seventh-year asked him and Sirius.

"We want to speak to your leader," Remus said.

"What is this?" asked a sixth year wielding a particularly large snowball. "A bad sci-fi film?"

"Hold your fire," the dark-haired seventh-year instructed his fellow Hufflepuffs. Turning back to the Gryffindors he said, "I'm captaining these forces, you may speak with me."

"Okay," Sirius said.

"You lot," the dark-haired seventh year addressed the Hufflepuffs again, "take those snowballs and go back to fighting _Ravenclaw_."

"Can't we just throw one or two of them at Black?"

"NOW!"

With a few disappointed looks and a little grumbling, the Hufflepuffs turned away from Remus and Sirius and returned to the defense against Ravenclaw. The dark-haired seventh year approached.

"Who are you?" he asked.

"Sirius Black and Remus Lupin," Sirius said, indicating himself and Remus respectively.

"Justin Iustus," the seventh-year introduced himself.

"Pleasure to meet-" Remus began.

"What do you want?" Justin Iustus interrupted.

"We've come to offer you an alliance," Remus said.

"An alliance?" Justin asked.

"That's right," said Sirius. "We want to form an alliance between Gryffindor and Hufflepuff and use the joined power to crush Ravenclaw to a pulp."

"Figuratively speaking, of course," Remus added.

"Were we?" Sirius asked him.

"Yes," Remus said. "So what do you think?" he asked Justin.

Justin was frowning. "I don't know…" he said. "It doesn't seem very fair."

"Beg pardon?" Sirius asked.

"You guys call it an alliance, but isn't it just ganging up on Ravenclaw?" Justin asked.

"Well…yeah," said Sirius. "That's sort of the point."

"I don't think so," Justin said.

"You don't think what?" Remus asked.

"I don't think that will work for us. The alliance, it doesn't seem fair to Ravenclaw."

"Who gives a rat's fart about what's fair for Ravenclaw?!" Sirius exploded. "You're getting creamed, Iustus. Soon we will be too. Don't you want to win?"

"I'd rather go down in a fair fight than win in and unfair one," Justin said simply.

"Then you're a prat!"

"What Sirius means to say," Remus cut in before Sirius could continue, "is that it's not cheating for us to form an alliance against Ravenclaw. It's just another way to play the game. You can hardly say that it's fair that most of your House has headed back inside. And it wouldn't really be fair to the rest of your House who stayed to fight if you let them get crushed."

"If we go down, we'll go down know we played a fair game," Justin said.

"_If_ you go down?" Sirius said. "Justin, mate, open your eyes!"

"We appreciate the thought you put into this plan, but our answer is going to have to be _no thank you_." Justin walked away.

"But…" Sirius began.

"Come on, Sirius, it's over," said Remus. "Let's go back to our own fort."

"I'm not giving up that easy," Sirius said stubbornly. "I think we should ask the rest of the Hufflepuffs what they think."

"In case you've forgotten," Remus said, "the rest of the Hufflepuffs wanted to pelt us with snowballs."

"Oh yeah."

"Let's get out of here."

Remus and Sirius turned around and headed back through the path they had made coming over, Sirius muttering all the way about stupid Hufflepuffs being too "fair" and "just" for their own damn good.

Greg Bennet and Henry Brian were not impressed.

"We _tried_," Sirius explained. "But that Iustus bloke just kept saying it would be unfair to Ravenclaw. Finally, it was like, 'Alright, if you enjoy getting creamed…'."

"That doesn't really surprise me," Brian said wearily. "Justin Iustus has always been a bit to just for his own good."

"That's what I said," Sirius told him.

"So what do we do now?" Bennet asked.

"Don't ask me," Brian said. "James Potter was the brains behind this operation."

"And we're so surprised it failed…" Bennet muttered.

"Hey! That's my friend you're talking about!" Sirius shouted.

"Yeah, well, your friend's an idiot!" Bennet shouted back.

"You're an idiot!" Sirius retorted.

"You're a bigger idiot!" Bennet countered.

"_Your face_ is an idiot!" Sirius roared.

"That doesn't make any sense!"

"_Your face_ doesn't make any sense!"

"OI! There's a war going on!" Brian bellowed. "Do ladies think you could find another time to argue this point?"

"Watch it, Brian," Bennet spat. "You may be Quidditch Captain, but _I'm_ heading these operations and you have no authority to tell me what to do!"

"Only because you put yourself in charge!" Sirius pointed out loudly.

"Yeah," Brian said, "nobody died and made you leader, Bennet. And with you in charge, it's small wonder that we're losing!"

_I'm just going to back away slowly now and hope they don't eat me,_ Remus thought. He edged stealthily away from the argument; no one noticed him leave. _I should find James. He is, after all, the brains behind this operation._ And so, turning his back on Sirius, Brian, and Bennet just in time to miss Bennet taking a swing at Brian and Sirius blasting Bennet with his wand, Remus set out in search of James.

James, it transpired, had usurped Bennet's position as leader of the troops when Bennet and Brian had left to talk to Remus and Sirius, so when Remus found him, he was at the front lines bellowing orders to the other Gryffindors. Remus was rather impressed; even the older students, some of them seventh years, had fallen under James's command. James seemed to be doing a rather better job than Bennet. He was yelling quite a lot, but his yells had a more team-spirit rallying tone than Bennet's harsh demands. Spotting Remus, James made his way through the crowd toward his friend, still yelling orders and advice to all those around.

"So, is Hufflepuff in?" James asked without preamble.

"Nope."

"Why not?"

"The short version? They're too just for their own damn good."

"YOU!" James bellowed suddenly, making Remus start. "Take those snowballs to the east side!" James instructed a group of second years. "We need more ammunition there!" Then he turned calmly back to Remus asked, "Sorry, what were you saying?"

"Hufflepuff thinks it's unfair to gang up on Ravenclaw."

"Merlin. I bet Ravenclaw would have taken the deal. Those Hufflepuffs are just a little too-"

"Hey wait! That's an idea!" Remus interrupted.

"What's an idea?"

"We join forces with Ravenclaw," Remus explained.

James eyed him thoughtfully. "You know what, Remus, that's not a bad idea."

"Will you come with me to their fort then?" Remus asked.

"I can't," James said. "I've got to stay here and command the troops. What happened to Sirius?"

"He was detained."

"Detained? By Hufflepuff?"

"By his own stupidity. Coupled with the stupidity of Bennet and Brian."

"I see."

Remus sighed. "I'll find someone else. If Bennet and Brian ever make it back over here, tell them the new plan, will you?"

"Sure thing," James said. "Good luck!" And with that, he ran back and started ordering the troops again.

Remus turned on the spot, surveying the Gryffindors for a new partner in crime. If he could just find Peter or Roy Hayden. Or even one of the girls, like Lily Evans or Lara Coote; they were both pretty nice. He made his way back from the front of the fort, searching the crowds, and finally found himself facing Sirius and Henry Brian, who seemed to be arguing, though not violently. Bennet was nowhere in sight. Cautiously, Remus approached them.

"Fid my node!" Brian said. He was attempting to use his hands to stem the flow of blood issuing from both his nostrils. Sirius was being very sympathetic.

"You want me to fid your node? Well sure, Henry, as soon as I learn what a node is and how to fid it."

"I dead fid my node!"

"Yes, I heard you the first three times. Fid your node."

"Nod fuddy!" Brian roared.

"I'm just yanking your wand, mate. I know you said fix your nose."

"Good, den fid id."

"Me? I'm only a third-year, I don't know how to mend broken noses."

Brian glared at him. "Den fide domeone!"

"You find me to find a dumb one?" Sirius asked.

Fortunately for both Brian and Sirius, at this point one of Brian's older friends had spotted the dilemma and come to intervene. With one spell Brian's friend fixed his nose and with a second cleaned up all the blood. It seemed safe for Remus to move nearer now.

Sirius and Brian were a little taken aback by the idea of forming an alliance with Ravenclaw, but were open to it nonetheless. Brian seriously doubted Ravenclaw would accept the offer because they really didn't need any help to defeat Hufflepuff. Sirius was convinced that he could win them over with his charm. Remus and Brian shared a joint eye-roll.

Remus asked if they should tell Bennet about the plan.

"Bennet is no longer concerned with this fight," Brian said cryptically.

Not wanting to know much in the way of details about Greg Bennet's fate at the hands of Brian and Sirius, Remus asked no more questions about Bennet and simply asked Brian if he would like to accompany them to the Ravenclaw fort. Brian declined, so Sirius and Remus set off on their own to the other side of the Gryffindor fort closer to the Ravenclaws.

Halfway across, they heard someone calling their names

"Remus! Sirius! There you guys are!" Peter yelled, jogging towards them.

"Pete!" Sirius exclaimed. "Where the hell have you been?"

"Making snowballs," Peter panted. "Where are you going?"

"The Ravenclaw fort," said Remus.

"Why?"

"We'll explain along the way," said Sirius.

They were about to set off again, when someone just behind them let out a cry of pain. Turning, they saw Delangela Narkin removing one of her gloves and wincing.

"Delangela," Remus said, moving towards her. Sirius and Peter followed rather reluctantly. "Delangela, what's wrong?"

Delangela looked up at him from her hand, her eyes starting to glisten with tears. Then she whined, as melodramatically as was possible, "I think I broke a nail!"

Remus blinked at her. It had to be a joke. "Seriously?" he asked her.

"Well, it really hurts," Delangela said with a careful combination of tearfulness and defensiveness.

"Oh for the love of Merlin," Sirius muttered, taking Remus by the upper arm and steering him away from the blond mountain of crazy with her ruined manicure and towards the edge of the fort. Once there, Remus pulled out his wand again to melt a path, and the three boys made their way stealthily toward the Ravenclaw fort. Along the way, Sirius filled Peter in on the happenings at Hufflepuff and the plans for Ravenclaw.

Their arrival at Ravenclaw went similarly to their one at Hufflepuff. Remus had barely stowed his wand away again when…

"GRYFFINDORS!"

"GET 'UM!"

_Crap. Again._

"We come in peace!" Remus and Sirius shouted together.

"Please don't hurt me!" Peter squealed, covering his head with his arms and cowering.

"They've come to spy on us!" one Ravenclaw girl yelled.

"Let's bury their heads in the snow," said another, drawing her wand.

Fast as lightening, Sirius was armed as well. "Stop! Stop!" Remus yelled, grabbing Sirius's wrist as he raised his wand and holding a hand out toward the girl. "We came to talk, not to fight."

"Oh, so you've come to surrender, is that it?" the girl sneered. "Are you giving up?"

"No," said Sirius, who had lowered his wand at Remus's encouragement but had not put it away. "We're not surrendering."

"Then why are you here?" the first girl asked.

"We're not talking to you," Sirius said. "Who's in charge around here?"

"Jensen," the first girl said.

"And where can we find this Jensen bloke?" Sirius asked.

The two Ravenclaws exchanged a small smirk. "We'll take you there," the second girl said.

Remus wasn't at all sure that he trusted the two girls, but they didn't really have other options, so they followed the girls across the fort. The Ravenclaws they passed were working so hard and under such strict control, nobody even seemed to have time to waste glancing at them as they walked by.

When they reached what seemed to be the center of the operation, they found a group of seventh years having a hurried tactics discussion. One of their escorts hailed their captain.

"Hey, Jensen!"

The seventh years turned to look at them. Remus swallowed; they all looked rather intimidating grouped together. Two of them left the group to meet the Gryffindors; one, a rather heavyset boy, the other, a girl with a light brown braid running the length of her back. When she reached them, the girl raised a very carefully sculpted eyebrow. "Gryffindors?" she asked.

"Apparently so," said the heavyset boy.

"They said they wanted to speak with Jensen," one of the girls accompanying the Gryffindors told the seventh years.

"We do," Remus confirmed.

The girl with the brown braid folded her arms and considered to boys carefully. "Go on then," she said.

Sirius gave the girl a slightly patronizing look. "We wanted to speak to _Jensen_," he said pointedly. He turned to the heavyset boy. "We're told he's the one in charge."

A smirk appeared on the boy's face that was not unlike the one the two girls had exchanged earlier when Sirius had first asked them to take them to Jensen. "I'm not Jensen," he told Sirius.

Sirius looked around. "Then who is?"

"I am," the girl with the brown braid said coldly. "Medea Jensen, at your service."

_Oops._ Remus racked his head for something to say to gloss over Sirius mistake, but Sirius was already way ahead of him.

"You're the one in charge here?" he asked Medea Jensen.

"Yes," she answered.

"But…" Sirius stuttered, "but you're a_ girl_."

_Oh why, Sirius? Why?_

"Are you implying that girls can't captain snowball wars?" she asked dangerously.

"Not as well as boys can – ow!" Sirius rubbed his side where Remus had poked him.

"Please ignore my friend," Remus said to Medea Jensen. "He's taken one to many snowballs to the head today I'm afraid."

"Clearly," Medea said dryly.

"We came to talk to you about forming an alliance against Hufflepuff," Remus explained.

"An alliance against Hufflepuff?" Medea asked, raising one eyebrow again.

"That's right," Remus said.

"Why?" she asked.

"So we can beat them," Remus said.

"Duh," Sirius added.

"_Please_ stop talking," Remus implored Sirius.

"Why would we want to form an alliance with you?" The heavyset boy asked. "We can beat them without your help."

"Ahhh…" said Remus. That had been what Brian had said they would say. Remus didn't actually have an answer.

"So you can beat them faster," Peter suggested. He looked more than a little intimidated by Medea and her friend, but at Remus's encouraging nod, he continued, "It's getting dark. If we don't end this soon we'll have end with no winner. Wouldn't you rather end it with a victory?"

"Yeah," Remus said, picking up on Peter's idea. "This snowball fight has been too exciting to end in a stalemate."

"They make a good point," the boy said, turning to Medea. "It is getting dark. The teachers aren't going to let us stay out here much longer before the come out and start shepherding everyone back inside. Maybe we should consider it."

Medea, however, didn't look very impressed. She still had her arms folded and was surveying Remus so closely she might have been trying to read his mind.

"You offered this deal to Hufflepuff first, didn't you?" she asked.

_Spooky._ "Did you just do Legilimency?" Remus asked her, more than a little unnerved.

"Do what?" Sirius asked. Remus ignored him. He could explain that later.

"No, I didn't," Medea said, though she did look slightly impressed that Remus knew what Legilimency was. "It's just not that hard to figure out what's going on here. You went to Hufflepuff to try to get them to help you gang up on us, but they turned you down so you've come here instead."

They'd been caught, so Remus decided that they might as well just come clean. "Yes. You're right. We went to them first."

This seemed to amuse Medea. "So, tell me. Why did they turn you down?"

"They said it wouldn't be fair," Remus said.

"Not they," Sirius corrected. "Just there mighty great prat of a leader."

"Justin Iustus, right?" Medea asked.

_Now that's just creepy._ "How did you…" Remus began.

"Lucky guess," Medea said shortly. "So let's get this straight. You went to Hufflepuff to offer an alliance. They refused out fairness to us. Now you're going behind Hufflepuff's back to come to us and form an alliance against them because turned you down because they want to play fair. Is that the general picture here?"

"Well…yeah," Remus said, suddenly feeling very small.

"We thought you'd know better and take it because Ravenclaws are supposed to be smart," said Sirius.

"Even the girls?" Medea asked him with an icy look.

"Yes," Remus said, before Sirius could have the chance to say something stupid again. "The girls as much if not more so than the boys."

"Sucking up now?" Medea asked. "You know," she mused, "there seem to be a lot of House stereotypes going round today. The Ravenclaws are smart, have the best strategy, and are winning. The Hufflepuffs are losing and are too soft to know a good offer from Gryffindor when they hear one." She paused, with the expression of one savoring a good insult on her face, which could mean nothing good. She was about to get her revenge for Sirius's comments earlier. This is why is why you didn't mess with girls. "But the Gryffindors," she continued, "I would have expected you to be back at your fort fighting valiantly even though you know the battle is lost. But you're not. Instead, you're hatching _cunning_ schemes to form alliances and sucking up to _achieve your ends_. Now those don't sound very much like _Gryffindor_ qualities…" she trailed off with a small, poisonous smile.

Any Gryffindor would have been offended by what Medea Jensen had just insinuated, but no one more so than one of the Gryffindors standing before her. "Oh you'd better watch who you're calling a Slytherin!" Sirius shouted raising his wand.

Medea didn't even bother to draw her own but simply eyed Sirius with smug amusement. "I suppose if the name fits. You're a Black, if I'm not mistaken."

"Yes. And I'm a Gryffindor."

"Perhaps," Medea said. "But we all know that, with a few exceptions like Justin Iustus, nobody really fits into their House stereotypes perfectly. Just because someone is dropped into one House doesn't mean they can't retain the qualities of _another_ House.

"Why you…"

"Sirius! No!" Remus said, grabbing the back of Sirius's jacket as he started toward Medea. "Put you're wand away, please, we're not here to duel!"

"Did you here what she said to me?" Sirius growled, trying to throw Remus off.

"She's just trying to wind you up," Remus said. He raised his eyebrows at Peter, who took the hint and helped him hold back Sirius. "She's just saying it to get at you. It's payback for you being a sexist git earlier."

"No one talks to me like that and gets away with it," Sirius said dangerously.

"Oh give it a rest, Black," Medea said, still smiling smugly. "You're friend's right. I'm just getting my revenge via verbal assault. It happens to be a female specialty. No need to get your knickers in a bundle."

"This isn't getting us anywhere," Medea's friend said impatiently. "If we're going to take down Hufflepuff, we've got to get moving. And you lot need to get back to your own fort to spread to word," he said to Sirius, Remus, and Peter.

"Sorry, what?" asked Remus, still holding Sirius back.

"Go – back – to – your – fort," Medea said slowly and clearly. "You need to tell your captain we've accept your offer."

"But…wait…you have?" Remus stuttered. "Why? How? When did that happen?"

"Just now," Medea said.

Remus was thoroughly confused. "But you were insulting us just now…"

"Yes," Medea said matter-of-factly.

"Then why…"

"Because," Medea said, "you forget one thing, Gryffindor-boy-whose-name-I-never-bothered-to-ask: what it all boils down to in the end is that we, unlike Hufflepuff, are smart enough to know a good offer when it is presented to us, and apart from that, any other factors" – her eyes flicked to Sirius and back – "don't really matter. Run along now."

"Okay," said Remus, who had finally relinquished his precautionary grip on Sirius. "Give us ten or fifteen minutes to get back and spread the word. Then we'll give you the signal and we can all storm Hufflepuff."

"What's the signal?" Medea asked.

"How about a whole bunch of Gryffindors starting to storm toward Hufflepuff?" Remus suggested.

"Works for me," said Medea.

As Remus, Sirius, and Peter started to make there way back to the other side of the fort closer to Gryffindor, Remus called back to Medea, "And my name is Remus, by the way."

"Remus? Really? That's a stupid name," she called back.

"So is Medea," he retorted.

Medea laughed. "It's Greek," she called to him. "Funnily enough, it means 'cunning'." And with that, she turned away and began shouting orders at the Ravenclaws in a very Bennet-esk way.

Remus, Sirius, and Peter returned to the Gryffindor fort. Once there, they sought out James, filled him in on the plan, and then spent the next ten minutes running around informing every other Gryffindor in the fort. They all busied themselves making snowballs until James organized them into lines. Remus, Peter, and Sirius were right in front.

"Ready…set…CHARGE!" James yelled.

With many various loud, indiscriminate war cries, the mass of Gryffindors swarmed forward, out of the fort and into the no-man's land. Seconds later, a roar went up from the Ravenclaw fort, and Ravenclaws began to escape from behind their fort and surge into the field as well. The groups collided in the center, but no one stopped to chat. Instead, the two Houses joined together into a massive crowd and went straight for the Hufflepuffs. The crowd reached the remains of the ever-crumbling Hufflepuff fort and attacked, sending Hufflepuffs running in every direction as they fled from potential death by spherical snow. James and Medea were still yelling themselves hoarse, but no one could hear them, because everyone else was yelling as well.

It was over in less than seven minutes. Most of the Hufflepuffs had retreated back to the castle. Justin Iustus surrendered on behalf of all those remaining. It was over. Gryffindor and Ravenclaw had won. But most importantly, Gryffindor had won.

Most everyone went inside after the battle, but Remus, Sirius, Peter, and James decided to stay and enjoy the last bit of their weekend out in the snow before facing a week's worth of lessons in the confinement of the castle. Together, they waded out across the grounds through the deep snow looking for a shallow patch, which they found in the shadow of one of the towers. The ankle-deep snow was much more manageable for the third-year boys. Dusk was falling now, and they knew that they only had a limited amount of time before they had to return to Gryffindor Tower or risk being caught out after hours (not that they were truly bothered – it was just something to note). James half-heartedly suggested that they build a snow-wizard, but they were all exhausted from the snowball fight and finally just collapsed backward to lie in the snow.

"Well, this is a lovely victory party," James commented.

"If you want to light sparklers and run around singing some sort of victory song, knock yourself out," Sirius said. "But I'm wiped."

"Me too," said Peter. "And I have snow in places I didn't even know I had."

"It's not just me then?" Sirius asked.

"You guys are weird." James propped himself up on his elbows to survey his friends. "Remus, what are you doing?"

Remus, who had been moving his arms up and down and his legs in and out, stopped. "I'm making a snow angel."

"Why?" Peter asked, propping himself up like James.

Remus shrugged and started moving his arms and legs again. "Just because."

"Good enough reason for me," said James. He laid himself back down in the snow and started making a snow angel of his own.

"I wanna make one!" Peter said. "How do you do it?"

"You just move your arms and legs to make the wings and skirt," Remus said.

"Duh," James added in his ever-sensitive manner.

"Like this?" Peter asked, lying back and imitating James and Remus's movements.

James sat up to examine Peter's work. "Congratulations, you've mastered snow-angel-making 101. Next on your to-do list, master advanced Animagi magic."

"Well, that shouldn't be to difficult," Peter said, rolling his eyes.

Remus sat up too. "You know, Peter, you don't have to do this if you think too hard for you…"

"No one asked for your input, Remus," James interrupted.

"Aren't you going to make a snow angel, Sirius?" Peter asked.

"I don't do skirts," Sirius said shortly.

"Neither do we," James pointed out, "but that doesn't stop us from making snow angels."

"Why do snow angels have to be girls anyway?" Sirius asked.

"They don't have to be," Remus said. "You can make yours a bloke."

"A bloke in a skirt?" Sirius asked.

"It doesn't have to be a skirt," Remus said impatiently. "It can be…billowing robes."

"Do they wear robes in Heaven?" Sirius asked.

"No idea," Remus said. "Not that it would make much difference to you, Sirius." James and Peter laughed.

"I wouldn't be so high and mighty if I were you," Sirius told Remus. "Do they even let werewolves into Heaven?"

"I'm not sure," said Remus.

"You don't sound too concerned."

"Nothing I can do about it if they don't."

"Who even says there's a heaven anyway?" James asked.

"There might not be," Remus said. "You can't know what's coming in the afterlife."

"So then why does it matter?" James asked.

"It matters because if there is something like a heaven in the afterlife, it would be nice to know what sort of attire the angels wear, so Sirius can make his snow angel without picturing himself in drag," said Remus.

"Well, at least there's a point to this conversation," said James.

"Who says angels are even real?" Peter asked.

"Oi. It doesn't matter," said James. "Just make your damn angel already, Sirius."

"I don't think I will, thanks."

"Come on, you know you want to, all the cool kids are doing it," James said.

"If all the 'cool kids' decided to jump off the Astronomy Tower would you do it?" Sirius asked him.

"Depends, what's the weather like?" James asked.

"I'm getting cold," Remus said.

"Yeah," said Peter. "Can we go in now?"

"But Sirius still has to make his snow angel," James said.

"If you're waiting for me to make my snow angel before you go in, you will be waiting a very long time, mate."

"Fine," James said. "Let's just go in then." They stood, Remus, Peter, and James being careful not to mess up their angels as they did. As the other boys brushed snow off of themselves, James pulled out his wand and pointed it at the Sirius shaped indent in the snow. Seeing what he was doing, the other three gathered around to admire James's work.

"Ha ha," Sirius said sarcastically. "Very funny James."

"I think it's funny," Peter giggled.

"Seconded," said Remus, grinning.

James had used his wand to draw in the snow around Sirius's imprint. He had added two small horns on Sirius head and a long tail with a forked end poking out from behind. As they watched, James and his final detail: a pitchfork in Sirius's hand.

"There," James said, finishing the pitchfork with a flourish of his wand and standing back to admire his art. "I think I did a good job. The likeness is uncanny, isn't it?"

"Eerily so," said Peter.

"Let's head in," Remus said. And so, the four boys started to make their way around the castle to the front doors, James using his wand to melt them an easier path through them an easier path through the snow.

"Cheer up, Sirius," James said as they walked. "It was only a joke."

"I know," Sirius said. "And it could have been a lot worse too. I thought maybe you were going to draw a skirt on me."

"Of course! Why didn't I think of that?" James asked, turning around and making like he was intending to go back before Remus and Sirius grabbed him by his jacket and pulled him back. "Never mind," James said, walking in the correct direction again. "I'll come back and do it tomorrow."

"We have lessons tomorrow," Remus reminded him.

"Tomorrow evening then."

"You know when we should come out again…" Peter began.

"When?" Remus asked.

"Next Sunday night," said Peter.

"I can't then, Peter," said Remus. "That's full moon."

"I know," Peter said, smirking slightly. "That's why I want to come out. I want to see if your snow angel turns into a snow-wolf."

James and Sirius laughed. Remus shoved Peter – playfully not meanly – but apparently a little too hard. For the second time that evening, Peter toppled over sideways into a large snowdrift. Sirius and James laughed even harder as the watched Peter struggle to get back on his feet. Finally, James and Remus reached into the snowdrift, and together they managed to get Peter on his feet again.

"Sorry about that, Pete," Remus said, though he was chuckling a little himself.

Peter let out a high-pitched squeal of pain.

"Peter, what is it?" James asked, slightly alarmed.

Peter was holding his right hand out in front of his, his left hand around his right wrist, gazing at his gloved fingers with a pained expression.

"Pete, what's wrong?" Sirius asked.

And then Peter cried, in a very good imitation of Delangela's shrill whine, "Ahhh! I think I broke a nail!"

The others blinked. Then, as one, they and Peter all burst into laughter. It took a long while for them to stop. Even James, who hadn't been there for the original, could appreciate the joke. When they were finished, they continued on their way. And together, the four Gryffindors entered the castle and made their way to the common room to celebrate their victory and commemorate a wonderful day spent out in the snow.

* * *

Author's Note: So if you've reached the end of the chapter you've realized that it has very little to do with advancing the greater plot of the story. This was actually a small plot bunny that I thought would made a funny lead in to _The Silver Knife_. Then the bunny grew bigger and swallowed its own chapter. Well...that was...predictable. Anyway, sorry if you thought it had nothing to do with anything and I hope you still had a few chuckles.

Reviews are always appreciated!


	4. The Silver Knife

Author's Notes: I just want to say thanks to all of my readers and reviewers, particularly skHermione. You guys are all amazing and what makes this worth doing, so thank you. This chapter is set three days after _Potential Death by Spherical Snow_. Enjoy!

* * *

The Silver Knife

The following Wednesday, the Gryffindor and Slytherin third-years were down in the dungeons together for their potions lesson just before lunch. There was no potential for death by spherical snow down here, only by Slytherins, exploding potions, and the sharp knives they were all using to chop ingredients. Remus personally favored his odds against the snow. In theory, James and Remus were supposed to be working on their potion together. In reality, very little work was actually getting done.

"Where'd you get that?" Remus asked, pointing at the ornate ring James was wearing on the middle finger of his right hand.

"My dad gave it to me for Christmas." James moved his hand so that the ring caught the light. "Potter family heirloom. Do you like it? Sirius hates it."

"It's cool," said Remus. The ring was old but beautiful: large ruby was set in yellow gold with what Remus supposed was the Potter family crest. "I like your other family heirloom better though."

James grinned. "Yeah, this ring's not very useful for sneaking round the castle, but I like it."

"Why doesn't Sirius?"

James turned to look at the back of the dungeon where Sirius and Peter were working on their potion and lowered his voice. "You know Sirius; he's not to big on family stuff. Says he'd rather die than wear a ring with the Black family crest. But just because he wouldn't, doesn't mean I can't."

Remus nodded, then squinted at the blackboard at the front of the dungeon. "Add two _whats_ and a pinch elder tree dust?" he asked.

"Eels' eyes," said James. "Honestly, you're the one who needs glasses, mate."

"That Slytherin girl's head's in my way."

"You need X-ray vision!"

"We need to get working on this potion," said Remus, rummaging through his potion ingredients kit for eels' eyes.

"Fine, okay," James said. They worked diligently on the potion for a while until they reached a line in the instructions that told them to let their cauldron stew for ten minutes.

"Ten minutes? What will we do with all of our free time?" asked James.

"We could prepare our ingredients for the rest of the potion," Remus suggested.

"Or we could not."

"Fine, what do you want to do?"

"I want to try out this new hex I found on Snivelly."

Remus sighed. "Can't you do that later? We're in the middle of a lesson."

"Since when has a lesson ever gotten in my way?"

"James…"

"Fine. Whatever. I'll do it later."

"Thank you."

"Killjoy."

"That's what they call me." Remus took James's silver knife carefully by the hilt and began to shred knot grass to add to the potion when it was done stewing. James looked like he was considering helping for a brief moment, but then seemed to think better of it. He leaned back in his chair, hands behind his head, and surveyed the classroom lazily.

"I never told you about what Sirius did to Delangela last week, did I?" James asked after a few minutes silence. Remus set down the knife and looked up from the knotgrass. James's gaze was fixed across the dungeon, where Sirius and Peter were flicking eels' eyes off the edge of their desk in the direction of Delangela, who was a few desks behind James and Remus. They seemed to be having a competition to see who could hit her first.

"No, you didn't," Remus said.

"Want to hear about it?"

_What's the harm?_ Remus thought. "Sure."

So James launched into the story, but after the phrases "feral squirrel" and "day-of-the-week underwear" found their way into the first five sentences, Remus changed his mind.

"Never mind, I don't want to hear about it."

James shrugged. "Suit yourself. Hey look, Peter hit Del!"

Remus and James watched as Delangela turned wildly around in her seat, trying to see who had hit her. Her eyes fell on Sirius and Peter, who were both determinately absorbed in Sirius's potions book. She looked about ready to charm a few dozen eels' eyes to pelt themselves at the two boys, but before she could, her partner recalled her attention to their potion.

"Damn," James whispered. "Would have been a good show."

"That's ten minutes," Remus said, checking his watch.

He and James added the grass Remus had shredded to their potion and continued with the rest of the instructions. A few minutes later, James grew bored, and Remus resigned himself to that fact that he would be finishing this potion alone. Remus worked steadily to the second-to-last line of the instructions, and then…

"OI!" James shouted suddenly.

Looking up, Remus saw what James was yelling about. A few desks behind them, two Slytherins had managed melt their cauldron. Their poorly concocted potion was seeping across the floor, and for some reason the potion seemed to expand as it flowed. Those nearest backed away as the potion spread towards them. Girls squealed as they lifted their feet and the hems of their robes from the ground. Some people stood on chairs or sat on their desktops. Those who were not so quick as to avoid the potion developed slimy green scales on the bits of skin that the potion had touched.

"Ewww," Delangela whined. She had been working at the desk next to the Slytherins and was now perched on Lily Evans's desk across the dungeon examining her scaly elbow and forearm.

"That's a nice look for you, Narcosis!" Sirius called to her.

Delangela climbed to an empty chair and reached down to the floor scooped up a large handful of the thick, glutinous potion. Her hand was instantly covered in scales and webs grew between her fingers, but she didn't seem to mind; next moment, she had hurled the handful of potion straight at Sirius's face. Sirius ducked and just missed the flying potion, but a small bit splattered onto Peter's neck.

"HEY!" Peter yelled, rubbing his new patch of scales.

"Calm down! Calm down, everyone, please!" Slughorn called over the babble and the squeals, trying to restore order. "We can have this sorted out in a jiffy if everyone can try to remain calm!"

"_We're all going to die!_" a girl with scales on both ankles cried hysterically.

"I said calm, Miss Park," said Slughorn.

"Watch out!" James told Remus. Remus looked down to see that the potion was moving rapidly for them. James jumped backward onto their desk, and Remus followed suit.

Slughorn took out his wand and started to vanish the potion from the floor, all the while assuring his students he would be able to rid them of their scales. Remus watched as at least a third of the class queued at his desk to receive an antidote. As he adjusted himself to get a better view, still perched on the desk, his fumbling left hand found the edge of something sharp.

Pain. Unimaginable and unendurable pain flowed from Remus's hand though his body. He managed not to pass out right there, but in his agony, the dungeon swam before his eyes. He was not aware of anything around him. He was sure he was going to die from the pain. Somehow, his feet found the floor and he slid off the desk. Slowly, he brought his searing left hand out in front of him. Through his swimming vision, he could see the short hilt of a knife and one edge of a silver blade in his hand. The other edge was settled deep into his flesh. He could feel himself getting weaker. His swimming vision was starting to fog. He couldn't hear or recognize anything around him. He felt like his whole left arm might fall off. In his pain and confusion, only one thought penetrated his mind. He felt his back hit a wall, and as his knees gave way and he slid to the floor, he summoned any remaining strength to raise his right hand and yank the blade from his left. The feel of the cool hilt of James's silver knife in his right hand was the last thing he knew before he fainted.

* * *

"Watch out!" James told Remus. James jumped backward onto his desk, and next to him, Remus did the same. James chuckled as he watched Slughorn attempt to calm the various members of their class who had become recently scaly. Across the room, Sirius was laughing himself stupid at Delangela, who was looking between his scale-free face and her own webbed fingers with a murderous look in her eyes. To add to James's delight, James saw Snape, with one shoe off, examining his scale-covered foot and webbed toes with much the same expression on his face as Delangela.

Peter, Delangela, Snape, and about a third of the other students in the room, rushed to Slughorn's desk to wait for a cure to their "fishy little problem". Slughorn went to his store cupboard to find ingredients for and antidote, muttering something about foolish students being unable to follow simple directions. James was finding the whole situation hilarious.

"Ah, here we are," Slughorn said, extracting a bottle of smoky gray potion from his stores. James watched as students shoved one another in their eagerness to have their scales removed first and Peter almost got flattened.

"Good thing we didn't get any, eh Remus?" James said, turning to him. "Remus?"

Something was very wrong with Remus. He had gotten off of the desk, and James watched as he backed himself into the wall and slid to the floor.

"Remus?"

Remus appeared not to hear him. His eyes were glazed and James doubted he was fully conscious. Slowly, Remus raised his right hand and pulled something from his left. Then his eyes closed, and he slumped, completely unconscious.

"Remus!"

James jumped from the desk and onto the floor beside Remus. In the hubbub of descalification, no one else seemed to realize something was wrong.

"Remus," James said, shaking his friend by the shoulder. Remus did not wake. James looked down at Remus's left hand and felt he might be sick. There was a large cut running vertically down Remus's palm, and it was the most revolting, infected looking wound James had ever seen. His whole hand had turned a nasty, purplish, dead-looking color, and the color was steadily creeping its way up the veins in Remus's arm as James watched.

"What the…" James muttered, confused. Remus had been fine a minute ago when they had leaped back onto the desk. How had he sustained such a gruesome injury so quickly and without anyone noticing? James's eyes moved from Remus's diseased looking left hand to his right. Remus was holding a knife, and James knew he had pulled it out of his left hand moments before he had fallen unconscious. James took the knife and examined it. He recognized it; it was his own silver knife that he used for chopping potion ingredients. _But why…_

Then it hit him.

"Professor!" he yelled, turning away from Remus, the bloody knife still in his hand. "Professor Slughorn! We need help over here!"

But Slughorn was to busy distributing the last few doses of antidote to hear James. James was torn; he didn't want to leave Remus, but he would have to to attract Slughorn's attention.

"James, what's going on?" Sirius had heard James's shouts and come over to investigate. He took one look at Remus's hand and his face promptly drained of color. "Sweet Mer-"

"Go get Slughorn!" James instructed him. Sirius didn't need telling twice. He sprinted across the room and was gone.

James turned back to Remus. He was hardly aware of the fact that he was kneeling in a puddle of Remus's blood. He took two fingers from the hand in which he was not still holding the knife he had taken from Remus's hand and placed them on Remus's neck. He thanked Merlin for the steady pulse he felt that meant Remus was still alive. But for how much longer? James had no idea about that. He knew that silver was extremely toxic to werewolves, but he had no idea how long it took to kill them or if there was even a cure for silver poisoning. "Hang on, Remus," he whispered.

"He's over here, Professor. I don't know what's wrong with him, but-" Sirius had returned with Slughorn and a knot of curious students at his heels. Many of them gasped when they saw Remus's terrible wound and broke into a chorus of mutters.

"What happened?" Slughorn asked, kneeling down beside Remus and James.

Silently, James showed Slughorn the bloody silver knife. He didn't want to say anything specific with a crowd of onlookers, but he didn't need to; Slughorn got the gist at once.

"Mr. Black, go to my cupboard and fetch me the bottle of bright blue potion, second shelf on the left. Miss Evans, please go to the hospital wing and bring down Madame Pomfrey."

Lily and Sirius did as they were told. The rest of the class stayed grouped around Remus, James, and Slughorn. Slughorn yanked up the sleeve of Remus's robe to see that the nasty purple color had spread to halfway between his elbow and shoulder. Slughorn took a large handkerchief from his pocket and tied it tight around Remus's upper arm to constrict the blood flow and stop the poison from spreading any further. Behind him, the class continued to mutter.

"Ew, that's gross."

"What's wrong with him, Professor?"

"Was it my potion, Professor?"

"Is he going to die?"

"That Lupin kid; I tell you, if it's not one thing it's another."

"Out!" Slughorn told them. "Everyone else out! Class dismissed!"

Everyone went to go pack up their bags and leave except for Peter, James, and Sirius, who reappeared a moment later holding a large bottle of glowing, neon-blue potion. He handed it to Slughorn. "Will he be okay?" Sirius asked.

"I felt a pulse," James told Sirius and Peter.

Slughorn uncorked the bottle poured the potion onto Remus's injury. The five of them, the four boys and the professor, were instantly consumed in blue steam. When it had cleared, they saw that not only was Remus's wound healing right before their eyes, but also the purple color was slowly receding down his arm.

"Wow," James whispered.

"So he'll be okay?" Peter asked in a squeaky voice.

Slughorn examined Remus's healing hand with professional interest, then untied the handkerchief constricting Remus's blood flow. "He should be fine. I made that potion a while ago just in case something like this were to happen. And it's lucky I did…"

"But, how did he get hurt in the first place?" asked Sirius.

James showed him the knife. "This," he said. "He must have accidentally cut himself with it when we jumped on the desk to avoid that potion."

Sirius looked confused. "But how does getting cut with a knife…"

"Silver," James explained. "A silver knife."

Sirius's eyes widened in comprehension. Peter still didn't get it.

"Silver is toxic to werewolves," James explained further. The classroom was empty now, so it was safe to discuss it.

"I take it Mr. Lupin told you three about his condition?" Slughorn asked, still examining Remus's hand.

"Told us, ha!" said James. "No way. We had to figure it out on our own."

"And I can see that it doesn't bother you," said Slughorn.

"Why should it?" James asked with a shrug.

Just then, Madame Pomfrey came speeding into the dungeon, followed by Lily Evans.

"What happened?" Madame Pomfrey asked as she neared them.

Slughorn turned to Lily. "Thank you, Miss Evans. You may go."

"Will Remus be alright?" Lily asked.

"He will be fine," Slughorn assured her. Lily collected the bag and left the dungeon.

"Silver poisoning," Slughorn told Madame Pomfrey once Lily had gone. "I gave him an antidote and he seems to be recovering, but I figured you should take a look at him all the same."

"Excuse me, Potter," Madame Pomfrey said. James stood and moved aside so that she could examine Remus. As he did so, he noticed for the first time that he was covered in blood. Slughorn noticed too. He took out his wand and quickly cleaned the dried blood from himself, James, Remus, and the floor.

Madame Pomfrey did a quick examination of Remus's wound and his vitals, and when she seemed satisfied that he would live for at least the next ten minutes, she conjured a stretcher from nothing and loaded Remus onto it.

The trip to the hospital wing was pretty uneventful. Fortunately for Remus, none of the other classes had been dismissed yet, as there was still about eight minutes before the bell was due, so nobody saw him unconscious on a stretcher being levitated by Madame Pomfrey up to the hospital wing. James, Sirius, and Peter followed just behind Madame Pomfrey. As they walked, James explained in whispered installments the bits of the incident Sirius and Peter had missed.

They reached the hospital wing, which was empty. Remus was transferred from the stretcher to a bed, and as Madame Pomfrey fussed around with getting more potions to heal Remus's wound, James, Peter, and Sirius sat themselves down on the unoccupied bed beside Remus's.

"How long before he wakes up?" James asked Madame Pomfery as she applied a thick orange paste to a piece of cloth and dabbed it on Remus's injured hand.

"Not long, hopefully," she said.

"I don't really get it," Sirius admitted. "I mean, we've seen Remus with silver sickles and stuff. It's never hurt him before."

"Silver poisoning only occurs when silver enters a werewolves blood stream," Madame Pomfrey explained. "If it gets as far as the heart, the werewolf will die." Busy with the paste, she missed the horrified looks the boys exchanged.

Muttering something to herself, Madame Pomfrey went to her office, presumably to get more potions for Remus. The three boys were left to sit and stare at their unconscious friend.

"That was a really scary thing to happen," said Peter.

"Yeah," James agreed. "Hope he comes round soon."

"I never even thought about it," said Sirius. "I didn't think about something like this happening. I mean, we've been using silver knives around him in potions for years now. He never mentioned anything."

"Maybe he didn't think about it," suggested James.

Remus groaned.

"Remus? You awake, mate?" James asked. All three boys leapt off the bed at once to huddle around Remus.

Remus opened his eyes. A spasm of pain instantly crossed his face. "Merlin, my hand feels like it's on fire," he moaned.

"That's to be expected," said Madame Pomfrey, reappearing with an armful of bandages. "I'm afraid it takes a while for the pain to wear off."

"What happened?" Remus asked.

James held up the bloodstained knife, which he hadn't even realized he had still been holding all the way up to the hospital wing. "Remus, mate, you should know better than to go sticking silver knives into your hands. Your going to hurt yourself one of these days, you know."

"What?" Remus asked. He still sounded a little out of it.

"Silver poisoning," Madame Pomfrey explained. "You know, Remus, it's not that I don't enjoy your company, but I think I see quite enough of you in here after the full moon without you making extra visits mid-lunar cycle."

Madame Pomfrey knew she could speak freely in front of James, Sirius, and Peter because ever since they had found out about Remus's condition, they had come to visit him in the infirmary after every transformation. She knew that they knew what their friend was.

"Brace yourself now," Madame Pomfrey told Remus, "I need to bandage your hand."

Remus put his right hand in his mouth and bit down on it to stop himself crying out in pain as Madame Pomfrey took out her wand and used it to make the bandages wind themselves around his left. "It looks like it's pretty much healed," Madame Pomfrey said as she worked. "You'll have a bad scar, I'm afraid, probably for the rest of your life. However, it seems there will be no other lasting damage. How are you feeling?"

"Lousy," said Remus, removing his hand from his mouth.

"You will most likely feel weak for the rest of the day. Silver does strange things to werewolves. I'll see if I can't get you something to help with the pain." She retired to her office once more.

"So… I still don't really understand what happened," Remus said, rubbing his head with his right hand. James explained as best he could what he had seen and surmised about the incident. "I kind of remember it, I think," Remus said.

"Why didn't you tell us about this, Remus?" Sirius asked. "If we'd have known, we would have been a lot more careful with our knives around you."

"I didn't think it was a big deal," said Remus. "I figured I'd just try to avoid being stabbed with knives in the middle of class and that would be that. I didn't think something like this could happen." He raised his hand, wincing, and examined it. "I've never had silver poisoning before," he told them.

"Well, Madame Pomfrey said you'd get better," James said in a rallying tone.

"Yeah," said Remus, lowing his hand. "Can you guys just explain one thing to me?"

"Sure," said Peter.

"How is it fair that when Sirius gets hit with a snowball, twelve girls surround him, but when I pass out in Potions, I get you three and Madame Pomfrey?"

* * *

Remus lay on his bed later that night feeling totally and completely exhausted. He had stayed in the hospital wing for the rest of the morning and the afternoon, and it had taken a good deal of persuasion and begging on his part to stop Madame Pomfrey from holding him for the night. She had released him just in time for him to make it to dinner, but not without much fussing and many warnings about the fragile state he was currently in. He was starting to wonder if he should have listened to her; all he had done was go to dinner and back to the dormitory, and he was wiped.

He didn't know how long he had been laying there, staring vacantly at the canopy of his four-poster, when his roommates came up for bed.

"Hey Remus, how's your hand?" Peter asked.

It was throbbing. "Better," he replied.

"How are you feeling?" asked James.

Remus was feeling rather ill. "I'm okay. I should be all better by tomorrow."

"That's good," said Sirius.

Remus summoned his small amount of remaining energy and sat up. He changed into his pajamas like his roommates and crawled back into bed.

He studied his bandaged hand. It still hurt quite a lot, though it was not nearly as painful as when the incident had occurred. When the silver knife had pierced his hand, it had been agony beyond imaginable. Remus was used to pain, but this pain had been exceptional. He had not felt pain like that since…

_No,_ he told himself, _don't think about that. If I think about it now, right before bed, I'll just end up dreaming about it again._

Remus climbed under the covers and pulled his hangings. He exchanged "G'nights" with James, Peter, and Sirius, then sank into his pillow, willing himself to think of something – anything – that wasn't _that_ night. It was useless. Try as he might to banish the memory, as he drifted off to sleep, it overcame him once more.

It always started in the same place…

_Remus was four, and he was playing with his toy broomstick in the backyard around sunset on a late-August evening._

_"Remus!" called a woman's voice. He turned to see his mother's large silhouette framed in the back doorway. "Come inside for dinner," she said._

_Reluctantly, Remus threw aside his broomstick and ran in through the back door. It took him straight into the kitchen._

_"Wash first," his mother instructed him. She was busy setting the kitchen table._

_Remus stood on the stepstool by the sink and washed his hands while his mother moved a large casserole dish to the table. It smelled like broccoli. Remus hated broccoli._

_As he dried his hands, his mother pulled a serving fork from a drawer, but she lost her grip and it landed on the floor. She tried to pick it up, but her large belly would not permit her to bend that far._

_"Remus, dear, could you pick up the fork Mummy dropped and put it in the sink, please?"_

_Remus did as she asked while she pulled out a clean fork and went back to the table. They sat down to eat at the same time the front door opened, announcing the arrival of Remus's father._

_"Oh good, John, you're home," Remus's mum called to her husband. "I was going to start dinner without you you're so late, but you've come just in time."_

_Remus father entered the kitchen. Remus shrank away slightly. John Lupin was normally a very kind man, but not even his four-year-old son had failed to notice the foul mood he had been in the last few days._

_"Hello, Fay," Remus dad said, bending to kiss his wife on the cheek and giving her a half-smile that did not reach his eyes. "Hi, Remus," he said as he sat down. "What's for dinner?"_

_"Chicken, sweet potatoes, and broccoli," replied Remus's mum._

_"I _hate_ broccoli," Remus reminded her._

_"But it's good for you, Remus," his mum told him as she scooped some broccoli on to his plate. "I'm only giving you a little, sweetie, but I want you to eat all of it, okay?"_

_"I want chicken too," he said._

_"And you can have chicken," she said, passing the broccoli dish to her husband so he could serve himself and picking up the chicken dish. "Here you are." She served her son chicken. "You can have all the chicken you fancy, but you also have to eat the broccoli, you understand?"_

_"Yes Mum," he mumbled grudgingly. He decided to start with the chicken._

_"So, how was your day, John?" Fay asked her husband._

_"Busy," John replied._

_"Do you think you'll have time to build the crib tonight?" she asked him while serving Remus sweet potatoes._

_John sighed. "Fay, I will build the crib. I promise."_

_"The baby's due in a month, John, and I've been asking you to build the crib for the last five at least."_

_"I'll do it, Fay," he said wearily. "I've just been a little distracted lately."_

_"I know," she said. "I just want to be ready, that's all."_

_He put down his fork and took her hand. He attempted to smile reassuringly, but it still didn't reach his eyes. "We will be ready," he promised her._

_They ate in silence for a while. When Remus was full he asked, "Can I leave?"_

_"Have you finished your broccoli?" his mother asked._

_"Yes," he said. He had managed to choke it down._

_"Then you may leave."_

_Remus went up to his room where he pulled out a coloring book and crayons. These entertained him for a while, but eventually he grew bored. What he really wanted was to play with toy broomstick more. The trouble was, he had left it in the backyard and it was dark out. His parents didn't let him go outside when it was dark. But maybe if he snuck out…_

_He crept downstairs and back in to the kitchen. His parents had since moved to the living room. He could hear their voices floating down the hall._

_"…don't know anything about this, Fay. You didn't see him. You didn't hear what he said."_

_"Lex warned you not to go messing with them, John. He told you to leave them be. But you didn't listen and now it's got you all upset-"_

_"Of course I'm upset! After everything that… _thing_ has done! He's a monster, he hurts innocent people, and you're damn right I'm upset about that!"_

_"But picking another fight with him is going to do you no good at all."_

_"The things he said…"_

_"But there's nothing you can do about it tonight, dear."_

_Quietly as he could, Remus opened the back door and crept into the yard. His parents heard nothing._

_Remus strode away from the house, trying to find the spot where he had left the broomstick. This wasn't easy, as it was very dark and the yard was very big._

_Unable to locate it by where he thought he had left it, he ventured further from the house._

_Something behind him moved._

_He froze, suddenly wishing he hadn't left the house. He listened. There was definitely something moving behind him._

_It was coming closer._

_Remus turned to see what it was, and when he did, he felt terror like he had never felt before. It was a gigantic wolf with yellow eyes that seemed to glow in the dark and fangs longer than Remus's fingers. It was coming at him fast and Remus knew he would never escape._

_He yelled and threw his arms protectively up in front of his face. The wolf lunged at him and sank its fang deep into his right arm just above the elbow. Remus screamed in agony, but it did no good. He fell backward and the wolf was on top of him._

_As Remus cried for his mummy and the wolf bore down on him, he saw a glint in the wolf's eyes that seemed to say, "You can cry all you want, but I've got you, and your mummy can't save you now."_

_The wolf attacked again, and Remus was consumed with the idea that this was all too much. It couldn't be real; it had to be a nightmare._

And it was…this time around.

Remus woke with a yell and sat bolt upright in bed, breathing as heavily as if he had just sprinted to Hogsmeade and back. He looked around at the dark velvet hangings of his four-poster bed. _ It was a nightmare,_ he told himself. _I'm at Hogwarts. I'm safe. There are no werewolves here._

Well, there was one werewolf there, but that wasn't the point.

"What's going on?" asked Peter's voice across the room.

"Remus, are you okay?" asked James's voice much nearer at hand. The hangings on the right side of his bed were pulled back to reveal a sleepy but concerned-looking James.

"I'm fine," Remus breathed.

"Then why were you yelling?" asked a disgruntled Sirius, who hadn't bothered to get out of bed.

"I'm just – I just – I had a nightmare," said Remus, trying to clam himself and slow his breathing.

"But you're okay now?" asked James.

"I'm fine," Remus repeated. "Go back to bed. I'm sorry I woke you guys."

James climbed back into his own bed and drew his hangings. Remus closed his again, making an effort to take slow, deep breaths. _It was just a dream. It was just a dream._

But it always seemed so real. Every time he had the nightmare, it felt as real as the night it had happened. He remembered praying on the night it had happened that it was all a nightmare and that he would wake up. But when he had woken, it was in St. Mungo's. He had been in terrible pain, and his parents were crying. He remembered it like it was yesterday.

Remus curled up under the covers, feeling miserable. As if it wasn't enough that he had a terrible curse to remember that night by. It wasn't enough that he had had to turn into a werewolf every full moon since that night. No, he also had to have the nightmare that plagued him when he was feeling his lowest and made him relive the terror of that night all over again. Remus winced as he accidentally rolled onto his left hand.

_That Lupin kid; I tell you, if it's not one thing it's another._

* * *

Author's Note: Reviews are always appreciated!


	5. Monsters

So this chapter is a bit shorter than it was originally because I decided to cut the James POV part from the end and stick it on to the beginning of the next chapter. It just fit better. But this one is still plenty long so no complaining!

Right now I'd just like to put in a small plug for my new Teddy-centric fic called_ **Morph**_. Unlike WAW, which already has a mostly complete story outline and an ending, Morph is still in the early stages and can go almost anywhere. If you have the time and are so inclined, please go read the first chapter of Morph and tell me what you think of the premise I've set up._  
_

Thank you to all of my readers and reviewers!

* * *

Monsters

"Moony? Moony? Moooooooooony? Moony, speak to me, Moony!"

"Humph," Remus said as he jerked out of the light dose he had been enjoying.

"Eloquently put," said Sirius, who had just shaken Remus awake. Remus was recovering from the full moon on the night before last, but as much as Remus needed the sleep, Sirius had a feeling that Remus would not appreciate it if they let him sleep through his morning classes. They were sitting in the Great Hall eating breakfast under the enchanted ceiling, which showed them the first snowfall of their fourth year. Remus had fallen asleep with his head resting on his folded arms on the table in front of him, an incredible feat given the noise level of the Hall, and until now his friends had let him rest undisturbed. However, they now had less than ten minutes to be in Charms, so Sirius had shaken their sleepy friend awake in order to ensure that he would not miss one action-packed minute of that which was a Hogwarts school day.

"Come on, we have Charms," said Sirius.

"Whazzat?" mumbled Remus.

"Charms, Moony. Padfoot said, 'we have Charms.' And he's right," James said looking at his watch. "We need to go." He and Peter stood up, each grabbing some toast to go. Sirius helped drag a yawning Remus to his feet, and the four of them set off out of the Great Hall.

James attempted to reestablish conversation as they left the Hall, but his mouth was full of toast and Remus overrode him. "Chew, swallow, then speak, Prongs. No one wants to see that this early in the morning."

"Tetchy tetchy," said Peter.

"Shut it, Wormtail," Remus yawned.

"Yeah Wormtail, I'd be a bit nicer if I were you," said Sirius. "One more wise crack like that and Moony will be out to get you. And we all know how scary a half-asleep, untransformed werewolf can be."

"I'll have you know that I am only twenty-three percent asleep at the moment, thank you very much, Padfoot," Remus corrected him, stifling another yawn.

"Oh, sorry, my mistake, Moony."

Moony. It had been his name for the past five months and he had to admit that he quite liked it. They had come up with their nicknames while staying at James's (Prongs's) place over the summer, and they had stuck like glue ever since. They had locked themselves in the parlor at the Potters' manor so as not to risk interference from James's parents and started their work on the Animagus transformation, and although they were far from being able to transform at will, they had made enough progress to at least discover what kind of animal they would become. At this point, James – who was _very_ fond of nicknames – decided that they would create their own, only to be used amongst themselves, based on the animals they could become.

_"It's not fair," Peter whined, hunched up in one of the parlor's squashy armchairs. "You guys all get to be big, cool animals and I'm stuck being a puny rat."_

_"Oh, come on, Peter," James said from his seat on the grand piano bench, "being a rat is going to be great! Imagine the possibilities!"_

_"Like what?" Peter asked._

_"Well, Sirius and I might be big animals, but there's lots of stuff that big animals can't do. You'll be able to… sneak into small places or… spy without being noticed or using the Cloak or…"_

_"Press the knot on the Willow," said Remus, looking up. He was curled up in his own armchair by the fireplace reading a book._

_"What?" asked James._

_"The knot on the trunk of the Whomping Willow. I told you that that's the way you freeze it so you can get in. Even if you wear the Cloak, you guys will still be in danger of getting hit by the tree if you approach the trunk. But if Peter were to transform, he could get to the trunk easily. The tree's not going to notice a little rat running through the grass."_

_"See, Peter," said James, nodding his thanks to Remus, "we wouldn't be able to even get to the tunnel without you."_

_"Well," said Peter, "I guess that's kind of cool."_

_"And," said James, whose imagination seemed to be running away with him, "you could make a quick getaway if you ever got in a sticky situation. One minute, Peter's there, the next, 'Hey, where did Peter go? All that's here now is a rat!' Quite handy for avoiding detention," James concluded._

_"And think of all the cheese, Peter!" said Sirius, who was lounging across the large sofa with his hands behind his head._

_"Pardon?" said Remus._

_"The cheese!" Sirius repeated, turning to look at him, his head in his hand propped up on one elbow. "Think of all the cheese you could eat, Peter!"_

_"Err, Sirius, I can eat cheese now," said Peter._

_Sirius shrugged. "Still, I know how much you like cheese."_

_"That's true," said Peter. "I guess being a rat could be fun."_

_"That's right," Remus said encouragingly._

_"Hey, I have an idea!" James said, his face lighting up with excitement._

_"Don't you always," Remus said a little wearily._

_"We should come up with nicknames that match our animals. You know, something subtle so that we know what we're talking about, but other people won't."_

_"That's not a bad idea at all," said Remus._

_"Try not to sound so surprised," said James._

_"What's your nickname going to be?" Sirius asked James._

_"Bambi," Remus suggested innocently._

_"That's girly," James said, sticking out his tongue in disgust._

_"Bambi was male, actually," Remus pointed out._

_"Yeah, well, he had a sissy name," said James. "And 'he' was a fawn, anyway. I'm a stag; I need a manly name."_

_"How about 'Stag'?" suggested Peter._

_"It lacks a certain creativity," said Sirius. "What if the nicknames didn't have to mean the whole animal? What if we just made them refer to distinctive part of the animals?"_

_"What's distinctive about a stag?" asked James._

_"How about the big effing antlers?" Sirius said. "You almost poked my eyes out with them, remember?"_

_"Prongs," said Remus._

_"Sorry?" said Sirius._

_"We'll call him 'Prongs'," said Remus. "It's subtle, but it refers to antlers, so it works for a stag."_

_"I like it!" James said. "Okay, what about Peter? What's distinctive about a rat?"_

_"Sharp teeth?"_

_"Watery eyes?"_

_"Generally unpleasant stench?"_

_"The tail," said Peter. "Rat's have big, long, bald tails. It makes them different from other rodents."_

_"Rattail?" suggested James._

_"If you want him to be constantly beat up with towels," said Sirius._

_"Oh yeah," said James disappointedly._

_"I think rats' tails look kind of like earthworms," Sirius mused._

_"Earthwormtail!" said James._

_"Think smaller," said Sirius._

_"Wormtail?"_

_"Eww," said Remus._

_"I think it's cool," said James._

_"Really?" asked Peter._

_"Yeah," said James. "It sounds tough. You don't want to mess with a guy named Wormtail."_

_"It's up to Peter," said Remus._

_"I think Wormtail's okay," said Peter._

_"Excellent!" said James. "What about Sirius?"_

_"Padfoot," said Sirius._

_"That was fast," said James._

_"I've been thinking about it," said Sirius, examining his hand with interest. "What makes a dog special? There are lots of things, but I like having paws the best. So, I can up with Padfoot."_

_"But then we don't get to go through the lovely banter of ridiculous names!" James whined._

_"Exactly," said Sirius._

_"Fine," James huffed, clearly disappointed. "We'll call you Padfoot. It is pretty cool, I guess. I mean, not as cool as Prongs, of course, but it will do."_

_"Glad you approve," said Sirius._

_"What about Remus?" James asked._

_"Me? I'm not going to be an Animagus."_

_"So you think that means you don't get a cool nickname?" asked James. "No way. You need a nickname too. How about Once-A-Month Wolfboy?"_

_"That name hasn't gotten any cooler in the two years since you first suggested it," said Sirius._

_"What's distinctive about a werewolf?" asked Peter. "I've only ever seen pictures of a transformed werewolf."_

_"Don't ask me," said Remus. " I don't spend a lot of time examining my appearance at full moon."_

_"We could call him 'Fang'," James said._

_"Hagrid just got a puppy named Fang," said Sirius. "We wouldn't want Remus to have to share."_

_"And all wolves have fangs," said Peter. "We want something that's special for a werewolf."_

_"If you think I'm going to go dig out my Defense Against the Dark Arts textbook while I'm on holiday just to look up the ways a werewolf is different from a regular wolf," Sirius began, "you are sadly-"_

_"There's the shape of the snout, the pupils, and the tufted tail for starters," said James, standing up and starting to pace as he thought. _

_The others stared at him. "You're starting to sound a bit like Evans," said Sirius._

_James threw a pillow from the nearest chair at him and said, "So I read a bit of the textbook? Big deal. It wasn't like it was for class or anything; I had a personal interest in the matter."_

_"Okay," said Peter. "How about Tufttail?"_

_"I prefer Once-A-Month Wolfboy," said Remus._

_"And we already have a 'tail' name," James said, resuming his seat on the piano bench._

_"Vicious, Blood-Thirsty, Man-Eating Monster?" suggested Sirius._

_"It doesn't exactly roll off the tongue," Remus said coolly. "And I thought we were going for subtle."_

_"Is that not subtle?" asked Sirius._

_"Not really, no," said Remus._

_The four of them lapsed into thoughtful silence for a few minutes, trying to figure out the perfect nickname for their werewolf friend. They all jumped slightly when James leaned his elbow absently against the piano and there was a great 'plunk' of discordant keys. James removed his elbow with a guilty smile at his companions and the room fell back into silent thought._

_"Moony," James said after a while. The others looked at him. "It's perfect," he continued. "It's subtle, so no one would figure it out if they didn't know, but it's also something special to werewolf."_

_"Moony," Sirius mused. "I like it."_

_"Me too," said Peter._

_They all turned to look at Remus. "Well?" asked James. "What's the verdict on Moony?"_

_Remus considered for a minute. "Sounds good to me."_

_"Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs," said James, gesturing in turn to each of his friends and himself as he said their new nicknames. "I think that'll work just fine. Oh, how I do love nicknames."_

And so the nicknames had been born, and had been used ever since.

"Cheer up, Moony," James said as they joined the queue outside of the Charms classroom. "It's only a matter of time before we finish with…" He looked carefully around for to make sure no one was listening in. "With our 'project'. Then we can come with you when you're dealing with your furry little problem and full moons won't be such a bitch."

"I hope so," said Remus, putting his bag down and leaning his back against the corridor wall. "This last one was really terrible."

"Now that's a little unfair, Moony," said Sirius. "All of your full moons are terrible."

"Speaking of unfair, did I tell you guys what happened at Quidditch practice last night?" James asked. This inevitably led to a long-winded but somewhat amusing story about something stupid James had done at practice the night before and the "unfair" consequences that had followed it.

* * *

"It's just so terrible, I can't even get my mind around it," said Lily.

"I know," said Mary MacDonald, her friend and fellow fourth-year. "I can't begin to imagine what she's going through."

"I don't want to imagine it," said Lily. They were walking to their first hour Charms lesson, but they both knew they wouldn't be able to focus on their class. Their thoughts were upstairs with Lara Coote, a girl with whom they shared a dormitory, and her family. Lara had received some terrible news this morning, and Lily knew that it would be on her own mind all day. It was an occupational hazard of being the empathetic person Lily was.

They reached Charms to find most of the class queued outside the classroom. None of the rest of them seemed to know the tragic news. Most people were chatting with each other and a few were hurriedly finishing the assignment due in today's lesson. James Potter seemed to be acting out an amusing story as he recounted it to his friends.

As Lily and Mary approached, Potter finished his story and turned to look at them. He seemed taken aback by the somber looks on their faces.

"Who died?" he asked, demonstrating his notorious lack of subtlety.

Lily spared him a cold look before answering, "Lara's little brother."

Potter and his friends gaped at her.

"What?" Black asked.

"He died night before last," said Mary, who was the verge of tears. "Lara just got the news this morning."

"But…but how did he die?" asked Lupin.

"He was killed by a werewolf," said Lily.

Each of the four boys reacted differently to the news: Pettigrew looked frightened, Black looked angry, Potter looked disbelieving, and Lupin looked like he might be ill. What they had in common was that all of them seemed to be robbed temporarily of speech.

The silence went on for a little to long for Lily's comfort. "It's horrible, isn't it?"

Black exchanged a fleeting look with Potter before asking, "Are you sure?"

"Sure of what?" asked Lily.

"Sure that he was killed by a werewolf," Black said. There was something strange about his tone, but Lily couldn't quite think what it was.

"He was found in the woods just outside the village they live in," Mary said, her voice rather higher than normally. "No one saw they werewolf, but he was…was really badly hurt. They took him to Saint Mungo's, but it was too late…"

She started to cry. The four boys were no longer the only ones listening. Most of the class had broken off from their own conversations to hear what Mary was saying. Lily put a comforting arm around Mary continued her explanation.

"He was dead before they reached the hospital," she said quietly, but so complete was the silence of her audience that everyone heard her. "He'd lost too much blood before he was found. But the Healers examined his body and confirmed that his injuries were caused by a werewolf attack."

"He was ten," Mary sniffed, wiping her face with her sleeve. "He would have come to Hogwarts next year."

Two of the other girls started to cry as well. The others looked miserable. The boys all wore expressions of deathly seriousness, but none more so than Potter, Pettigrew, and Black. The three of them were exchanging looks of deep significance. Just behind them, Lupin was leaning back against the wall, still looking as though he might be sick at any moment.

"Where's Lara?" asked one boy from the queue.

"In Dumbledore's office with her family," said Lily. "She and her brother and sister are all going home for a while for the funeral."

There was a short silence. Then, a girl with her arm around a crying friend asked, "Did they catch it?"

"Catch it?" asked Lily.

"The thing that killed him!" the girl exclaimed. "The werewolf; did they catch it?"

Mary shook her head, still sniffling. "They didn't find it."

"Well that's wonderful, isn't it," Delangela said sarcastically. "Lara brother gets slaughtered and her family doesn't even get to see the monster that did it put to death-"

"Shut up, Narkin," said Black. Maybe he thought it was inappropriate to talk about such things so soon after a tragedy.

"I agree with Del," said another girl. "There's no justice. If the werewolf got away, it will just be able to kill again next full moon. The least that can be done is-"

Her sentence was cut short by Professor Flitwick opening the classroom door and ushering the class inside. Most of the class filed in, some still wiping their eyes.

A few students lingered behind.

"Are you okay?" James asked.

"I'm fine," said Remus.

"You don't look very well," said Peter.

"I'm fine," Remus said more firmly. He picked up his bag and walked into the classroom.

"Oh he is _so_ not fine," Remus heard Sirius mutter to James and Peter. Remus ignored him. He chose a seat at the back, furthest away from his classmates. His three friends took seats around him and waited for the lesson to begin.

The morning went as miserably as could be expected. Excepting they few hiatuses when they were forced to be quiet and listen to teachers, the students talked non-stop about the attack on Lara's brother. It wasn't just the fourth-years either; Lara had an older brother in seventh-year and a little sister who was a second-year in Ravenclaw. By mid-morning, the whole school, all years and all houses, were discussing werewolves.

Everyone seemed to have an opinion; opinions they wanted to share with everyone else.

_"I think it's the Ministry's fault. If they didn't let monsters just run wild, things like this wouldn't happen. They should be locked away, all of them. If I get into the Ministry after leaving here, I'll have a lot of proposals to make in Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures."_

_"Wouldn't it make the most sense just to kill them all off? I mean, in order for someone to become a werewolf, they have to be bitten by a werewolf. If all of the existing werewolves were killed, they couldn't make more, and that would be the end of it."_

_"My aunt says that any werewolf with a sense of decency would off himself before he had the chance to hurt innocent people."_

_"There was a werewolf living in our village once. When everyone found out what he was, they chased him out. They didn't want a creature like that anywhere near them. I think they were right to do it. Our village is for wizards, not animals."_

_"Half-breed freaks is what they are! What kind of person rips apart an innocent ten-year-old boy? Monsters, all of them, mutant freaks!"_

_"Some friends of my parents had a daughter who was bitten by a werewolf when she was only six. She survived the attack, but her parents decided to put her down. Can you blame them? Who would want to raise a werewolf for a kid?"_

_"My dad says there's no place in Wizarding society for werewolves. All they ever turn out to be are criminals and murderers. I personally think that our world would be a lot better off without that kind of filth."_

Wherever he went that morning, Remus was surrounded by werewolf bashing. He heard it as he walked down the corridors between classes. He heard it from his classmates whenever they had time to chat in class. There was even a group of third-years discussing werewolves in the bathroom when Remus went there after second hour Defense Against the Dark Arts.

He tried to ignore it; he tried to convince himself that they didn't know what they were talking about and that what they said wasn't true. It was useless. Even if most of the stuff they said was a big pack of lies, the fact that they said it and thought it was enough. Of course, no nasty comments were aimed in his direction, but it was still hard to deal with the harsh reality of hate that was being presented on all sides.

Remus's friends were taking it just as bad, possibly worse. They seemed to take each nasty comment they heard about werewolves as as much of a personal insult as Remus did. Part of Remus was grateful; it was reassuring to have friends who cared so much about him. And he did prefer their indignation on his behalf to the alternative, which would have been his friends distancing themselves from him as they remembered that Remus the werewolf was just as capable of murder as the werewolf who had killed Lara's little brother.

Another part of him was slightly irritated by their over-protectiveness. Did they think he was so fragile that he couldn't cope? He wasn't immune to how the world saw him, in spite of his parents' and Dumbledore's best attempts to shield him. He knew perfectly well the low position he held in Wizarding society, that he was at Hogwarts only by a sheer miracle, and that he would never truly fit in as a werewolf in a world of wizards. He was not so naïve and as easily wounded as his friends seemed to think. And anyway, where had their sympathy for his condition been on that night they had dragged him into the dark trees of the Forbidden Forest and threatened to kill him for being what he was? Their actions had been in humor, but they still came off as a little hypocritical.

But then, another part of Remus was not handling things as well as he would have liked to pretend. Somehow, it was two entirely different things to imagine the abstract concept of everyone hating him and actually hearing his classmates – people who knew him, people he was friendly with, people he saw everyday – saying things that were so hurtful to him, even if they couldn't possibly know it. This was the part of him that made him want to spend a lot of time hiding alone in a dark room so as not to have to face the world.

And yet another part of him was worried. With all this talk about werewolves fresh in everyone's minds, what if someone figured out about him? He would be out of school so fast it would make Snitches look like snails; that was, if he got out at all. And his friends' attitudes certainly weren't helping this. How could people _not_ get suspicious when everyone and their cousin was cutting down werewolves _expect_ James, Sirius, and Peter, who were defending werewolves. It was for this reason that Remus had to stop James (who was easily the most agitated of Remus's friends) when they had past a group of girls in the corridor after Charms who were making some particularly rude remarks about half-breeds, and James had made like he was about to start arguing with them.

"Prongs, no, please don't," Remus whispered, catching his indignant friend by the arm to hold him back. "Just let it go."

"Why should I?"

"It will just be worse if you go over there and make a big deal about it. It certainly won't make anything better by starting an argument, and you're never going to change their minds anyway. Just let it go."

"I can't. I don't like to hear people talk about my friends like that."

"Then do it for me, Prongs. I'm asking you, as a personal favor, please don't say anything. To them or to anyone else. It will only make things worse."

James let out a breath that was somewhere between an angry huff and a resigned sigh. "Alright, I won't say anything."

"I need you to promise me."

"Fine, Remus, I promise."

James kept his promise for the rest of the morning, though Remus could tell his resolution had been tested when Haley joined them. Haley Harrison was Lara Coote's best friend, and she had missed Charms that morning be with Lara and comfort her. She returned halfway through DADA class, bringing with her a wealth of new details about Lara brother's death and a large share of werewolf hate. As Haley informed their gossip-ravished peers about the intimate details of the werewolf's attack and the foul nature of werewolves in general, Remus could tell that it was all James could do not to march over to where Haley sat and start biting her head off.

And another small part of Remus, though annoyed and worried, was a little grateful for the distraction James provided. Making himself personally responsible for insuring his friends wouldn't do anything stupid gave Remus an outlet for the restless energy building inside him and stopped him from doing something stupid himself.

With all these parts of him battling it out and his mind being pulled in every direction as he went from anger to stress to depression and back again, Remus found that by the time lunch came around, he had quite lost his appetite. All and all, he'd had better mornings.

James was having trouble keeping his opinions to himself, but he was much less worried about himself than he was about Remus.

"I'm not hungry," Remus said quietly as they headed to the Great Hall for lunch. "I'll see you guys later."

"Come on, Remus," said James, knowing it would be better for Remus to eat than to brood over the lunch hour. "It'll do you some good to get some food in you."

Sirius and Peter agreed, so Remus grudgingly followed them to the Great Hall for lunch. The Gryffindor table was already crowded when they entered. The only seats available were next to Lily, Delangela, Mary, and Haley Harrison, four people James knew that Remus didn't want to sit by. However, as they had no choice, they headed for the empty seats. As they neared the girls, their conversation became more and more audible. _I wonder what they're talking about? _thought James._ Bunnies, perhaps?_

"But they're mostly just normal people, aren't they?" Lily Evans was asking Haley. "I mean, except at the full moon, aren't they just regular humans the rest of the month?"

As the boys reached the four girls, they saw Haley shake her head. "No, it changes them. The bite, I mean. It makes them violent and stuff. They only become real wolves once a month, but if you ask me, they're just as dangerous when they're human, just less easy to spot." _Not bunnies, then._

Remus stopped at the point of taking a seat. "I'll see you guys later," he said, and before any of them could say anything, he had gone.

Sirius watched him go and then turned a stony expression to James. "Nice going, Prongs."

"What did I do?" James asked, completely taken aback.

"'It'll be good for you to get some food', now look what you've done," snapped Sirius.

"I didn't know they would still be talking about it!"

"What did you think they would be talking about? Bunnies?"

"Maybe," James admitted sourly.

"What are you guys talking about?" Delangela asked.

"Mind your own business!" James snapped at her.

"Should we go see if he's alright?" Sirius asked, ignoring Delangela's interruption.

"He probably wants some time alone," said Peter, "to think."

"Yeah," said James heavily, "but that's probably not the best thing for him, is it?"

"No," Sirius agreed. So without taking their seats, they turned and left the Great Hall.

"Aren't you going to eat?" Delangela called after them. James resisted the urge to make a rude hand gesture at her over his shoulder as he walked away.

"Where do you think he went?" Peter asked, as they climbed the marble staircase. "Gryffindor Tower?"

"Maybe," said James. "Or he could be hiding in a bathroom."

"He might have gone to the hospital wing," suggested Sirius. "If ever there were a day to fake ill…"

"Where first then?" James asked. "Or should we split up, do you reckon?"

"That's probably best," said Sirius. "Okay, I'll do the Tower because I forgot my Potions essay in the common room. Wormtail, why don't you take the hospital wing? And Prongs, you can check the loos."

"See you in History of Magic," said James. He and Peter headed off in the direction of the hospital wing and the nearest toilet. Sirius went the opposite direction toward Gryffindor Tower. _If ever there were an excuse to skive off History of Magic…_ Sirius thought.

* * *

Remus was curled up on top of the blankets in his four-poster, and although he was still very tired, he couldn't sleep. He stared at the dark velvet of the hangings he had drawn around himself as phrases he had heard that day pounded in his head:_ animals…half-breed freaks… should be locked away…monsters…it changes them…makes them violent…just as dangerous when they're human._

Remus had been trying so hard to keep it together, but these last words of Haley's had pushed him over the edge. They had brought forward a painful memory in him that, try as he might, he could not push away; because Haley had not been the first person to believe that his bite would change his human side.

_Remus sat just behind the door to the living room, listening to his parents arguing while nursing the still-stinging cut on his right arm. Last night had been his first full moon as a werewolf. He had awoken that morning in almost as much pain as the month before when he had been attacked and bitten. His parents had locked him in the unfinished basement for his transformation, and had come down just after dawn to find that he had not only done serious damage to walls, floor, and furniture, but he had also done himself several painful injuries. They had healed him the best that they could and tried to reassure him that everything was all right as he cried. He could tell they didn't really believe it. He had hated seeing the sadness in their eyes as they had looked down upon him, broken, bleeding, and in pain. There had also been something else in their eyes that he had not been able to recognize at the time, but that he would later realize, had been fear._

_He had spent most of the day in his bedroom, trying to sleep through the pain, but now he was awake. He had crept downstairs from his bedroom to hear his parents' angry voices issuing from the living room. His parents hardly ever fought, so Remus was curious to hear what it was about. He had hidden himself in the hall, just behind the living room door, where he could hear but not be seen._

_"We've got to think about the baby, Fay," Remus's father was saying. "We're about to bring another child into this world and I want it to be a safe world."_

_"You've got to think about your other child, John," Remus's mother said sternly. "Remus didn't ask for this to happen to him. He's still your son."_

_"I know he is, Fay. But I'm worried. You saw what happened last night; you saw how much damage was done. Are you really comfortable with having something capable of that living in your house? Especially with a new baby on the way!"_

_"How dare you say such things like that! How dare you speak about your own son that way!"_

_"He's a werewolf, Fay! I don't think you understand what that means."_

_"I know perfectly well what it means! It means that at the full moon he turns into a wolf, and the rest of the time he is still my wonderful, sweet Remus. That is not going to change."_

_"As far as we know," Remus's father said darkly._

_"And what is that supposed to mean?"_

_"How can we be sure he's still our sweet Remus? How can we know he won't change? How many werewolves do you know who are good, upstanding members of society? How can you sure that Remus won't become violent and cruel just like the rest of them?"_

_"Shut up, John!" Remus's mother shouted, her voice choked with tears. "He won't change! I won't let him! I'm not going to let his life be ruined by this. I will do whatever it takes to makes sure that Remus lives a normal life and doesn't let this change him. Because he's my son, and I love him."_

_"Yes, Fay, but he's also a-"_

_"Yes, I get it John," Remus's mother interrupted. "I understand that you don't like werewolves. That's kind of what got us into this mess in the first place!"_

_There was a short silence. Remus didn't understand what his mother meant, but it seemed to upset his father a lot. He heard his dad walk across the room and sit down in on the sofa. After a few moments silence, Remus heard him say, in a choked voice, "What have I done?"_

_There was another pause, and then Remus's mum said, "John, I'm sorry. This isn't your fault. I shouldn't have said-"_

_"It is," Remus's dad whispered. "It is my fault. I can't pretend it's not."_

_Remus was very confused. Why was his dad blaming himself? It wasn't his fault at all… was it?_

_"Look," Remus's dad said more calmly, "Fay, I don't want you to get the wrong idea. I love Remus, you know I do. He's my son for Merlin's sake. I want what's best for him; I'm just not sure what that is right now." He sighed heavily before continuing, "I want to protect Remus, but I'm not sure I'm the best man for the job. Don't you wonder… maybe it would be better… aren't there places he could go?"_

_"What do you mean?" Remus's mum asked. Remus heard her lowering herself slowly onto the sofa beside her husband. She had to do it slowly because she was now nine months pregnant; the baby was due any day, and she was very big._

_"Somewhere like… I don't know… like a pack? He will never be able to have much of a life with normal wizards. Maybe he would be better off with some of his own kind."_

_"You want to send our son away to live with a pack werewolves?" Remus's mum asked quietly._

_"I don't want to, but what are our other options? He will always be an outsider in the Wizarding world. Maybe it would be better, he would be safer, with other werewolves."_

_"No."_

_"Think of it logically, Fay."_

_"Hell no."_

_"Fay…"_

_"NO! No way! Are you insane? You think he'd be safer with werewolves? You think he'd be better off? Hell no! He'd have no chance, no chance at all. You want to see how quickly your son can change into monster, stick him with people who will teach him how to be one! We will keep Remus here and we raise him like a normal boy. Maybe then he'll have a chance at some humanity!"_

_"And what about the baby? What if Remus were to hurt the ba-"_

_His sentence was cut off by a sob from out in the hall._

_"Oh no," John whispered. He stood and followed the sound of his four-year-old son's sobs to the living room door. He pushed it open to find Remus sitting there, crying with a different kind of pain than he had that morning._

_"Remus…" John said soothingly, kneeling down next to his son._

_"You – don't – want – me," Remus said between sobs._

_"No, Remus, no."_

_"You – want – to – send me – away."_

_"Oh, Remus, no, I didn't mean…"_

_"You – hate – me."_

_"Remus," John said, his voice heavy with guilt and regret, "I never said that. I don't hate you. I love you. I love you Remus."_

_Remus continued to cry._

_"Come here, Remus," Remus's dad said, opening his arms to hold his son. Remus moved away._

_"You – don't – love – me."_

_"I do, I do love you, Remus," John said, his voice cracking a little. "Please believe me. I love you so much."_

_"Why – do – you want – to get – rid –of me?"_

_"No, Remus, no. I don't want to get rid of you. I…" He didn't seem to know what else to say. Remus continued to cry._

_"Remus," John said, quietly, "please look at me."_

_After a minute, Remus raised his tear stained face to look at his father._

_"Remus, I love you. And I'm never going to send you away, I promise."_

_Remus hiccupped. "You – you promise?"_

_"I promise." He held out his arms again and his son climbed into them. They hugged. John lifted his son from the floor and carried him into the living room, where he sat down on he sofa beside his wife._

_Remus was still crying a little. Fay reached over and stroked Remus's hair, but when she spoke, it was to John. "You promise?"_

_"I promise," John said again. He took his son, who was still clinging to him, and set him on the little bit of lap his wife had left under he big belly. Remus hugged his mother's belly as she stroked him on the back._

_"Do you still love me, Mummy?" Remus asked her._

_"Oh, baby, of course I do," Fay said, her own eyes starting to glisten with tears. "I will always love you, no matter what. You're my Remus. I love you so much."_

_"I promise not hurt the baby."_

_"Oh, sweetie, I know you won't," said Fay._

_"You're going to be a great big brother," said John._

_"We love you, Remus," said Fay._

_"I love you too," said Remus still holding tight to his mother's belly._

_And then his mother let out a cry of pain._

"Remus?"

Remus's memory was interrupted by a voice from the dormitory door.

"Yes," Remus answered.

"Can I come in?" Sirius asked.

"It's your room."

Sirius walked in and came to stop beside Remus bed. "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

Remus sat up and drew back the hangings. Sirius was standing just behind them.

"Yes?" Remus asked

Sirius surveyed Remus cautiously; he was always extremely awkward when it came to what he called "touchy-feely comforting crap". He didn't like talking about feelings; that stuff was for girls.

"Are you okay?" Sirius asked, trying to keep the awkwardness to a minimum and still be there for his friend.

"I wish people would stop asking me that," Remus replied.

Sirius gave him a small smile. "Must get tiring after a while," he said.

"I don't know how to answer it anymore," Remus confessed. "I tell people I'm fine, they don't believe me. I tell people I'm not fine and they worry about me. It's a loaded question either way."

"Yeah," said Sirius. He seemed to be looking for a change is subject. "Did you get any sleep?" he asked.

"No. I really just came up here to get away from Haley," Remus admitted.

"Look, Remus," Sirius said, rubbing the back of his neck with one hand, "you shouldn't… you shouldn't take what she – what any of them say, you shouldn't take it personally."

"Who said I was?" Remus asked. He could tell how petulant the question had sounded. Sirius raised his eyebrows. Remus sighed. "I try not to," he said, avoiding Sirius's eyes. "It's just hard to ignore it sometimes."

"They're idiots, Remus. They all are. They-"

"They're not idiots," Remus said quietly. "They just don't know much about it. They only know what they've been taught, and that's to hate and fear werewolves. They're ignorant, not stupid." He thought for a moment. "Well, perhaps some of them are stupid," he said.

"Some," said Sirius, "or more."

Remus checked his watch. "We still have twenty minutes before class," he told Sirius.

"Yeah," said Sirius, "but we have to hunt down Prongs and Wormtail first."

"Where are they?"

"Looking for you," Sirius explained. "Wormtail was going to check to hospital wing and Prongs was searching the toilets."

"You guys worry about me too much," Remus said.

"Nah," said Sirius, "mostly just Prongs. I was hungry. He was the one who wanted to track you down. To be quite honest, I think it's far more likely he'll snap by the end of the day than you will."

"I don't intend to snap," said Remus.

"I didn't think so," said Sirius. "But Prongs, well, he can be a little…"

"Mental?" Remus supplied.

"He doesn't like it when people mess with his friends," said Sirius.

"Only he can mess with his friends," said Remus, smiling slightly.

"Exactly."

"Well, we should go find him before he does something stupid," said Remus, getting up from his bed and picking up his bag. "And Wormtail."

"Okay," Sirius said, picking up his own bag and following Remus towards the dormitory door.

"Oh, and Padfoot," Remus said, turning in the doorway to look back at Sirius.

"Yes?"

"Stop calling me Remus. You guys haven't called me Remus since last June. I know _why_ you guys stopped, but I prefer it when you call me Moony. Even days like today, I want to keep my nickname."

"Whatever you like, Moony."

They went down to the common room and headed for the portrait hole. Remus was surprised by how much better he felt. He knew that he still had a rough afternoon ahead of him, but somehow, it seemed more approachable. Sirius hadn't been able to do much in the way of helping Remus with problems, but it was really pretty amazing how much just talking to someone friendly had done to help him.

"Hold up," Sirius said, "just a minute."

Remus waited as Sirius wove back through the common room and collected his Potions essay from a table in the corner.

"Can't forget this," he said.

Sirius and Remus climbed out the portrait hole. The Fat Lady had just swung shut behind them when Peter came striding towards them down the corridor.

"Hi," he said, looking relieved to see that Sirius had found Remus.

"Hi Wormtail."

"Are you okay, Remus?" Peter asked.

Sirius winced. "Two mistakes in four words," he said. "That's a record even for you, Wormtail."

"I'm fine. Stop asking me that. And the name is Moony," Remus told Peter.

"Oh, well, okay," Peter said. "We just thought that, you know, because of everything that's been going on-"

"I know what you thought," said Remus. "But I really do like my nickname. Lighten up a little, Wormtail."

Peter seemed a little taken aback by Remus's positive attitude, and even more so when Remus smiled. "Come on," Remus said to his friends, "if we don't find Prongs soon, who knows what sort of trouble he'll have gotten himself into?"

_To be continued..._

* * *

Author's Notes: So did it make you feel sad? Did it make you feel angsty? Did it make you feel hungry? Tell me about it! Reviews are always appreciated!


	6. The Innocent Werewolf

Author's Notes: Sorry about the terrible chapter title. I could have called it "James does something stupid" because, as the wonderful skHermione pointed out, it was kind of inevitable. But that felt a bit on-the-nose. ;)

This chapter is a bit...well...melodramatic. I tried to break it up with some humor though, and I think it turned out pretty well. We pick up pretty much right where we left off in Chapter 5: _Monsters_

Everyone who reviewed _Monsters_, or any other chapter, this one goes out to you!

* * *

The Innocent Werewolf

_One thousand one hundred fifty-two, one thousand one hundred fifty-three, one thousand one hundred fifty-four…_

History of Magic had never exactly held James spellbound before, but rarely had he endured a lesson as tedious and miserable as the one today. He could think of several reasons why today's lesson was so much more agonizing than the usual snooze-fests he sometimes attended, sometimes skipped. For one thing, he hadn't eaten lunch, and he never faired very well with low blood sugar. He also couldn't stop thinking about what had happened to Lara's brother and the ripple-effect consequences it had had on the students at Hogwarts that day. This line of thinking was doing nothing to raise his mood, so he tried to force his mind into other channels. As the lesson was never something that would be interesting enough to capture his attention, he had had to find another means of distracting himself.

It was in this spirit that James had begun to count the stones that made up one of the classroom walls. It was certainly not the first time James had used this activity to pass the torturous hours of History of Magic. On the contrary, it was a pretty regular pastime. He had counted the stones more times than he knew, and always came up with a number somewhere between 3,678 and 3,684. Sirius insisted that there were 3,673 stones because he got that number every time he counted, but James was sure that this was too low. Sirius said that James must be counting some of the stones twice. Peter was likely to get anywhere from 3,579 to 3,712 when he counted. Remus had only made it halfway through counting the stones once before declaring it a waste of time and otherwise occupying himself.

_…one thousand one hundred sixty-seven, one thousand one hundred sixty-eight, one thousand one hundred sixty-nine, one thousand one hundred sixty-ten…_

Okay, so maybe it wasn't the most productive pastime, but it was keeping him from brooding on werewolves or dieing of boredom, so it would do.

_…one thousand one hundred seventy-three, one thousand one hundred seventy-four, one thousand one hundred seventy-who-cares, one thousand one hundred seventy-something-or-another, one thousand one hundred seventy-seven, I could really use a snack right now. I should keep something in my bag for those times I have to skip lunch. Maybe I'll skive off potions and go down to the kitchens. The house-elves'll probably be getting ready for dinner. Maybe they'll be making roast beef. Hmmm…I do love roast beef. Or chicken…yeah, chicken…with a nice big side of mashed potatoes… I'm never skipping lunch again. But, I mean, today it was pretty important. But why did it have to happen today? Why did it have to happen at all? Why did a ten-year-old boy have to die? What kind of monster of a werewolf would let himself do something this horrible?_

_Damn it, I'm brooding. Think of something else, James, just think of something else. One thousand one hundred seventy-eight, one thousand one hundred seventy-nine, oh where in the name of all that is holy is the damn bell? We've been here at least four hours, the bell should have rung by now. One thousand one hundred eighty, one thousand one hundred eighty-one, one thousand one hundred eighty-two, did I remember to put on clean socks this morning? I think I did. Oh well, one thousand one hundred eighty-three, one thousand one hundred eighty-snore, one thousand one hundred eighty-five, one thousand one hundred eighty-six bunnies, one thousand one hundred eighty-seven…_

_Why wasn't the werewolf more careful? Why did he make sure he was isolated? He could have stopped this if he had wanted to. He's a bloody murderer even if he wasn't in his right mind. He could have stopped this. He could have been more safe. Remus would never let anything like this happen. Why couldn't he be more like Remus? Why had he let himself kill? He deserves die._

_But…but what he hadn't? What if he did mean to? What if he did isolate himself and got loose by mistake? Then it would all have been an accident. He wouldn't have been able to stop himself. He wasn't in control. A werewolf would kill his own best friend if he met him at the full moon. He wouldn't know, because he wouldn't be himself. All werewolves become monsters at the full moon, despite who they are as humans. It could happen to any werewolf. Even Remus. Even Remus would hunt and kill if he somehow got out. What if that happened? What if he somehow broke out of the Shrieking Shack one night? Or what if someone found a way into the Shrieking Shack at the full moon? Remus would attack them, just like any other werewolf would. Remus was a monster. Remus would attack, he would bite, he would kill if he got the chan-_

_No. No, no, no, no, no. No. I can't think like that! Remus is my friend. I can't let myself picture him doing those things. I can't let myself think of Remus that way._

James looked away from the stone wall at which he had been staring blankly to look at Remus, who was separated from him by Peter. Remus had reassumed the position he had taken at breakfast that morning: folded arms resting on the table, head resting on arms. He was dead asleep. He looked peaceful. Poor Remus, why did it have to be him of all people? Remus was the antithesis of everything his classmates thought about werewolves, of everything James had thought about werewolves before he had discovered Remus's secret. Remus was great, and no stupid bite from a stupid werewolf was going to change that. He watched Remus sleep; Remus was one of his best friends…

The unwanted image flashed across his vision: a werewolf tearing apart its victim, slashing with its claws, licking the blood that splattered its muzzle. And then it was gone and he was staring at Remus again. He started where he sat as fear rose, unbidden, inside him. Remus became that werewolf. Remus could and would attack someone. Remus was capable of murder. And James was with him everyday. James was near him so often. James shared a dormitory with a creature that would tear him apart and enjoy it. James was sitting feet away from that monster right now-

_WHOA! What the hell are you thinking, James? You idiot! Merlin, I'm just as bad as all the other idiots around here. As quick to judge. As quick to fear. I can't think of Remus that way. I can't! This isn't Remus's fault. Remus has a curse, he can't help it. And yet people are so quick to judge him based on that curse. I can't be one of those people. I'm not one of those people. Remus doesn't deserve to be judged like that._

_Remus is _not_ a monster._

_Ugg, I think I'm getting a headache. I should never skip lunch. I'm going to go back to counting stones now. Okay, where was I…_

_Damn it! I lost my place! Now I have to start all over. Sigh. Oh well, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, which rhymes with hen, and hens lay eggs, man I could go for an omelet right now…_

James was in the middle of contemplating what cheeses he would put on his omelet when the bell finally rang. Remus's head jerked upward from his arms and he began to gaze blearily around the room, evidently trying to remember where he was. Peter tapped Remus on the shoulder and kindly reminded him that they had Potions next. All four Marauders stood and packed their things into their bags then joined the group of students all trying to flee the boredom through one door. As they crowded together, James felt Remus accidentally collide with him.

"Oh, sorry Prongs," Remus yawned.

James started again and backed away from Remus.

Remus was still too asleep to notice anything strange.

James kicked himself mentally for being an idiot. He was better than that.

"Don't worry about it mate," James said, clapping his friend on the shoulder. _Remus is not a monster._ "Listen," James continued, addressing Peter and Sirius as well now, "why don't we skive off Potions and go down to the kitchens? I'm hungry enough to eat a walrus, and, unfortunately, Slughorn tends to remind me of one. I don't think I can last another lesson on an empty stomach."

"Me neither," said Peter, though his response proved rather superfluous when his stomach gave a loud rumble.

"You know what would be good," said Remus once they had cleared the classroom and were on their way down to the kitchens.

"What's that?" Sirius asked him.

"An omelet," Remus replied. "I really fancy an omelet."

James grinned. "Moony," he said, stretching out a hand to tickle the giant pear, "great minds think alike."

James still felt guilty about things he had thought about Remus in History of Magic, and as they all piled into the kitchens and were served four large omelets by the smiling and bowing house-elves, James resolved, once and for all, that he would never be afraid of his friend. He watched Remus again as Remus and Peter began to debate swiss vs. provolone, and made another resolution as well. He would always stand up for Remus, no matter what. He was sick of listening to the whole school say horrible things about werewolves and watching Remus just stand there and take it. He was going to show them, to teach them that there was another side to werewolves that they were all just too blind to see.

Then he remembered the promise he had made to Remus earlier, and his heart sank a little. Remus didn't want James to stand up for him. Remus wanted to just ignore it and hope that it would all go away. But that was just stupid. If all the stuff being said about werewolves was negative (to put it lightly) and no one said anything otherwise, things would just get worse for Remus. But if James presented an alternative side, not everyone would listen, but some people might. They would at least know that there were two sides to the matter, that werewolves were more than just monsters to be hated. They were people too. And the students should know that…

_But I promised. I promised Remus I wouldn't._

James sighed internally as he played with the last bits of omelet on his plate, only vaguely listening to Remus telling Sirius off for trying to persuade the house-elves to serve them firewhisky. James didn't like to go back on his word, especially where his mates were concerned. He would have to keep his promise. He would have to try his best to keep his opinions to himself.

Poor James, he should have known better. He should have remembered that guilt had the power to make people do very stupid things.

* * *

_The Uses of Wolfsbane in Potion Making_

_By Remus Lupin_

Remus had started his essay forty-five minutes ago and that was how far he had gotten. He would attempt to focus on his essay, give up, stare blankly across the common room for a few minutes, remember he was supposed to be writing an essay, look down at the heading, and then become distracted again. Well, it was a rather distracting heading. The word "wolf" right there on the page in front of him, staring at him, mocking him.

_Did I just accuse an essay title of mocking me? Oi, I'm losing it._

Maybe he should have picked a different title. He could have used one of the other names for wolfsbane: monkshood or aconite. Those words would not have mocked him so badly. But the textbook he was using referred to it as wolfsbane, so it had made sense to him, forty-five minutes ago when he had started the essay, to call it wolfsbane as well. Now he was thinking that he should find a different textbook. After skiving off Potions today in favor of stuffing his face with omeletty goodness, he really couldn't afford to slack off on this essay.

He looked at his watch. It was twenty minutes to curfew. That really wasn't enough time to go all the way to the library, search for a book that did not use the word wolfsbane, check it out, and come back again. He could ask James to let him borrow the Cloak, but he knew better than that. James would never lend him the Cloak for homework purposes.

He sighed, staring absently across the common room again. Maybe he should just give it up for the evening and go to bed. It had been a long day.

He looked at his friends. James seemed to attempting the same essay Remus was, but with a similar success rate. Peter had his Transfiguration things in front of him and was sucking his quill with such intensity that it made Remus wonder if he was really thinking hard, or if the quill had come from Honeydukes. Sirius was in an armchair across the common room near the fire playing tonsil hockey with a dark-haired fifth-year girl Remus knew was called Demi Roberts. Sirius, it appeared, was not so concerned about his Potions essay.

"How's your essay coming, Prongs?" Remus asked.

James looked up at him. "It's not," he said shortly.

"Neither is mine," said Remus. "Want to work together?"

"Some saying about the blind leading the blind comes to mind," said James. "No offense, Moony."

"None taken."

"We could ask Evans for help," James said, turning in his seat to scan the common room for dark red hair.

"I doubt she'd help us," Remus said.

"Why not? She's good at Potions."

"Yes, but if we go over and ask her for help, she'll tell us that if we want to do better in Potions, we should actually _attend_ the classes."

"Good god, Wormtail, get that quill a room already," James snapped at Peter.

Peter pulled the sugar quill out of his mouth. "How you can lecture me," he began, "when Padfoot over there hasn't surfaced for air in about ten minutes, is something I will never figure out."

"Yeah, well, that's Padfoot, isn't it?" James asked rhetorically. "This is ridiculous," he proclaimed, slamming his quill down on the table and running his hands through his already very untidy black hair. "Wolfsbane will never be useful in any potion ever. Why we still bother to study it is beyond me. It's a huge waste of time."

"Oh, you don't know that," said Remus. "Wolfsbane could end up being very useful in a potion someday. They could even discover a potion to which wolfsbane is an essential ingredient. Maybe it will be used in a potion that could make your hair lie flat."

Peter snickered. James used both hands to frantically mess up his hair, leaving it the messiest that Remus had even seen it.

"And why," James asked, "would I ever want to use a potion like that?"

Remus examined James's appearance. He looked like an idiot. "No reason I can think of," Remus replied. "You know what, forget the blind leading the blind. We need to get this essay done and it'll go faster if we do it together."

James looked down at his paper, which Remus saw contained the heading: _The Uses of Wolfsbane in Potion Making, By James Potter_ and a very elaborate sketch of a Snitch. "Fine," James said, scooting his chair over to sit closer to Remus. He looked down at Remus's essay. "Ha, I've done more than you."

Remus and James were indeed more productive when working together. They had both always had the ability and knowledge to write their essays, but teaming up helped them to stay on task, which was exactly what they needed. They had been working for about fifteen minutes and had each managed to compose several inches when…

"So Lara says they've been holding a massive hunt for the werewolf ever since the moon started waning, but they haven't found it yet. They have some suspects though, you know, shady people around the area. The thing is, it's hard to prove someone's a werewolf when it's not full moon. But of course, local authorities don't want to wait a whole month. They're actually talking about testing potential suspects with silver to see if it poisons them."

It was odd – the sound of Haley Harrison's voice had never made Remus cringe _before_ today. Haley, and a small group of followers who had obviously yet to tire of the constant werewolf talk, had just come through the portrait hole and were now making their way across the common room. _Please don't come over here. Please don't come over here. Please just go up to your dormitory and leave us alone._

"But," said Mary McDonald, who was one of the group members, "even if they found a werewolf in the search, how would they be able to prove it was the same werewolf who killed Steven?"

_Please don't come over here. Please don't come over here._ Beside him, Remus felt James stiffen, and knew James wishing for the same thing. Peter started to chew his quill nervously rather than sucking it. _Please don't come over here. Please just go away._

"I'm not sure," Haley replied as she and her friends all took seats at the table just behind Remus and James.

_Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!_ Why did fate always have to pick on _him_?

"There might be a way to figure it out," Haley continued. "But what's the bad luck of having two werewolves hiding in one town? The odds on that must be pretty long."

"Right, but my point was that even if they find the werewolf, couldn't the werewolf just deny it and say it must have been some other werewolf? How can they prosecute anyone if they can't prove anything?"

"Mary's got a good point," said Roy Hayden. "How can they make a conviction without proof?"

"Well I don't know that that's such a big problem," said Haley.

"How do you mean?" asked Roy.

"I mean, how hard can it be to convict a werewolf of murder? If they find a werewolf, do you really think anyone is going to demand undeniable proof?" Haley scoffed. "Of course not."

"But what if they do convict the wrong werewolf?" asked Roy. "What happens then?"

"Well, hopefully they'll find the other one too. I have a feeling their town will be on pretty high alert for a long time after this."

"Right, but I meant, what about the innocent werewolf they convicted?"

Haley snorted. "_Innocent werewolf?_ There's no such thing. Trust me, even if they do convict the wrong werewolf, the werewolf they convict will just be getting what it deserves for something else it wasn't caught at."

Remus could literally feel the waves of anger pulsing out of James. This was stupid. Why were they still sitting here listening to this rubbish? Homework be damned; Remus was going to bed. He started cramming his things into his bag at random; trying very hard not to hear the conversation that was taking place behind him.

"But how can you be sure?" Roy persisted. At least _he_ seemed to be concerned for the injustices done to the werewolf. "What if the werewolf they convict never did anything?"

"Well," Haley sounded a bit annoyed with Roy now, "like I said, I highly doubt you'll find an innocent werewolf. It's just not in their natures. But if by some freak turn of events they convict a werewolf who has yet to commit any crimes, the world will hardly be at a loss. In fact, it's all for the better I should think. Lock it up before it has the chance to hurt innocent people. Lock them all up, as a matter of fact! That's what the Ministry would do if it had any sense!"

James was not following Remus's example of packing up. He was still sitting stiffly in his seat. Remus could see his hands clenched into fists on the table. He was staring straight ahead, not seeing anything, and his face was turning a brilliant scarlet color. Remus remembered what Sirius had said earlier, _I think it's far more likely he'll snap by the end of the day than you will._ James was angry, and he was about to snap. They needed to get out of here _now._

"James, come on," Remus hissed. "Let's go upstairs."

James didn't move.

"I mean, look at this situation," Haley continued to rant. "If the Ministry had done what was right and locked up all the werewolves before this could happen, then Steven Coote would still be alive, wouldn't he?"

"James!" Remus hissed again.

Mechanically, with his fists still clenched and his eyes still fixed unseeingly ahead, James rose from his chair. Peter started gathering his things up to leave as well.

"Come on, hurry up!" Remus didn't want to have to listen to a second more.

"And I mean really, what's stopping them?" Haley demanded of her fellow students. "What's stopping the Ministry from just locking up all the werewolves and throwing away the key, eh? What point does it serve to let them wander around freely? They're disgusting, half-breed wastes of space, and all they do is pollute the Wizarding world with their filth."

James, Remus, and Peter had left the table and were walking across the common room. James was actually shaking with his suppressed rage. Remus could feel the anger and the hurt welling up inside himself as well, but all he could think to do right now was to get James out of the common as fast and humanly or werewolfly possible.

"And then they come and they steal and they attack and they kill! They're monsters! All of them! Where's the justice in this world? How can those beasts still be allowed to walk free?! Forget locking them up – just kill them all! It would do the world a huge favor. All werewolves deserve to die!"

And James Potter snapped.

Before Remus could do anything, James had spun on his heel to face back where Haley was sitting and roared, "_SHUT UP!"_

Most of the common room went quiet. Haley, who had had her back to James, turned slowly in her chair to look at him. "Excuse me?" she asked, her voice low and dangerous.

"I told you to SHUT UP!" James yelled, advancing towards her. "You don't have any idea what the hell you are talking about, so do us all a favor and _SHUT UP!_"

Looks cannot kill. However, if there were ever a look that would be capable of striking someone dead, it would have been the one that Haley gave James as she stood up to face him. The anger coursing through her was as palpable as the fury racing through James.

"You will not," she said, her voice still low and growing more dangerous with every second, "stand there and defend werewolves, Potter. Not here. Not today."

"And why not?" James yelled. The whole common room had fallen silent now to watch the fight. "Why not!" James continued. "You don't the first thing about werewolves and yet you sit there and you judge them and you insult them and you tell people they deserve to die!? You don't know _anything_ about werewolves!"

"Oh, and you do?" Haley's voice was starting to rise in volume and pitch to match James's. "What makes you think _you _know so much about werewolves?"

_Hi, God, it's Remus. Listen, I know people usually get down on you for causing natural disasters, but I think now would be a really good time to have one. So, maybe if you wanted to, I don't know…hit Gryffindor Tower with lightening or…raise a tsunami from the lake or…send in Chicken Little to announce the sky is falling, I would really appreciate it. Or locusts even. I'm not a big fan of locusts myself, but if ever there were a good time for a locust infestation to hit – it would be now. Please and thank you. Amen._

"Trust me, Harrison, I know a lot more about werewolves than you ever will!"

"Yeah, well I know enough to know that they're bloody, filthy murderers!" Haley roared.

"You can't say that!" James shouted, frustration starting to color his angry tone. "You can't say all werewolves are murders because not _all_ werewolves _are_ murderers!"

_Cue locusts – now!_

"How dare you!" Haley spat. "How _dare you!_ An innocent ten-year-old was just _slaughtered!_ How dare you stand there and defend those monsters!"

_Now!_

"I'm not defending the werewolf who killed Lara's brother and don't accuse me of it. But not all werewolves are like that! Some werewolves are just normal people with a horrible curse. Some werewolves _are_ innocent."

"Oh yeah?" Haley half-shouted, half-sneered. "Like who?"

_NOW!_

"I'm not going to give you _names_," said James. "But I am going to tell that you couldn't be more _wrong _when say that all werewolves deserve to be locked up or killed. Actually, I don't think I've ever heard anything so _wrong_ in my entire life!"

"So you think they should just be allowed to run free, do you?"

"I think that if they're innocent, they have just as much right to freedom as any of us do. If they've committed a crime, they have just as much right to a cell as other wizards who have committed crimes. But you can't lock up innocent people, Harrison. If I haven't made it clear so far, it's _wrong_."

"But we're not talking about innocent people, Potter! We're talking about werewolves: half-breed _freaks_ who in my opinion would do the world a favor to go off and choke on their own fangs. And if it stops innocent people – _people_, not half-breeds – from getting hurt, then you're damn right I'll lock 'um all up! No matter how wrong _you_ think it is!"

_Hello? Is anyone even listening up there!_

Remus had had enough. He was sick of listening to Haley's bile and he wasn't much too fond of watching James make a great bloody prat of himself either. He had heard enough; he was leaving.

"If you think that locking up innocent people – and yes, when I say 'people', I'm including werewolves. If you think that locking up innocent people is a way to solve the world's problems, than you're the one that deserves to locked up – in a straightjacket!"

"Me?" Haley's indignant voice was muted slightly as Remus started to run up the boys' staircase to the dormitories. "I'm not the one who's a dirty half-breed lover! I'm not the one who defends _monsters_!"

SLAM!

Remus threw the dormitory door closed behind him with all the strength he had. He couldn't hear Haley or James at all anymore. In the stark silence and completely privacy of his own dorm, Remus leaned his back against the closed door, let all of his composure fall, and slid quietly down to rest on the floor.

* * *

It was over.

Haley Harrison had stormed off to bed in angry tears. Most of the Gryffindors had stayed down in the common room just long enough to give him a disgusted look and mutter about him to their friends before retiring as well. Demi Roberts had long since disentangled herself and abandoned Sirius in his armchair by the fire. Sirius and Peter had soon after gone up to the dormitory to find Remus.

And now it was his turn.

James had no idea at what point during his row with Haley Remus had fled. He only knew that when Haley had started shouting about how half-breeds were physically and mentally inferior to normal wizards and James had turned away with his hands over his ears saying "la la la la la, I'm not listening", Peter had been standing exactly where James had left him, and Remus had been nowhere in sight.

James couldn't blame Remus for leaving. Who could? No one should have to listen to that kind of slander being shouted about him. Remus had had a bad enough day already.

Standing in front of the dormitory door, James found he couldn't quite manage the strength to open it. He let out a long sigh, staring at it, wishing he knew what he would find behind it. Best-case scenario: Remus would be a little rattled, but genuinely glad that James had been there to speak in his defense. Worst-case scenario: well, James could only think how he would feel if he were in Remus's position. He couldn't imagine what it would be like to know that most of the Wizarding world hated him for something over which he had no control. To know that people would always hate him, fear him, and look down on him, and that there was absolutely nothing he could do about it.

It really had to suck.

But even with these horrible thoughts in his head, along with the memories of every miserable thing that had happened today, James could help but feel a little…_good_. He had stood up for his friend. He had shown people that there were two sides to werewolves. He had shut Haley up…for now at least.

In short, he had assuaged his guilt.

_Well, here goes nothing,_ James thought. He pushed open the dormitory door.

He could immediately tell that his friends had been talking about him. But then again, what else would they have been talking about?

"Hey," James said, looking from Sirius, who was leaning against one of the posts at the end of his four-poster bed, to Remus, who was sitting cross-legged on the end of his own bed, looking down at the bedspread, to Peter, who was sitting beside Remus.

"Hey," Sirius replied. Peter and Remus said nothing.

There was an uncomfortable silence.

"So," James said once the silence had become too much, "how you holding up, Moony?"

More silence, and then…

"I really wish you hadn't done that," Remus said quietly, not looking up.

"What?" James asked.

Remus looked up at him. He looked hurt, but he also looked…angry.

"You shouldn't have done what you did down there," Remus said coldly. "You promised me you wouldn't."

James gaped at him in disbelief. He hadn't expected Remus to jump up and thanking him or anything like that, but had never imagined that Remus would be _angry_. Sure, James had broken his word, but it was a stupid thing for Remus to make him promise in the first place. Didn't Remus understand that James had _had_ to do what he just did?

"WHAT?" James exploded. "You didn't want me to stick up for you? You wanted me to just … just _let _her say all of those horrible things about you? Did you?"

"I didn't say that!" Remus snapped. "But you sounded like an idiot down there! A ten-year-old boy just died, and there you are, defending the creature that brought it about. People are going to get suspicious! It took you lot less than a year to figure out my secret, and it's been over three years now, and you're yelling about werewolf rights, and people are going to connect the dots! And I don't know for sure, but from all of the shit I've heard today, I don't think people will be as accepting of my 'furry little problem' as you all are. But that's just a guess," he ended sarcastically.

James felt as though he had been slapped. Half of him wanted to curse Remus for being an ungrateful sod. The other half felt ashamed because he knew that Remus had a point. He had never considered before that he was risking revealing Remus's secret. Now it seemed almost painfully obvious.

"Moony, I…I'm sorry," James said quietly, forcing himself to meet his friend's eyes. "I didn't think of that. I didn't think I would make people suspicious. I was just trying to help."

"But you didn't help, Prongs," Remus said even more coldly than before.

"Come on, Moony," Sirius said, clearly trying to keep the tension level in the room under control. "Prongs said he was sorry. He didn't mean to do anything bad. Can't you at least accept that?"

Remus swallowed. "He broke his promise," Remus told Sirius. "He gave me his word he wouldn't say anything to anyone."

"And I'm sorry about that," said James. "But I couldn't let her keep saying those things about you, I really couldn't. Don't you think people deserve to know that there's more to werewolves than what Harrison has to say?"

"Not if it risks people finding out what I am," said Remus. "Once you put the idea in their heads, all they'd have to do is look at a lunar chart. Any idiot could do it. _You_ did it."

"I really don't think that's going to happen, Moony," James said. "No one's going to think that there's actually a werewolf at Hogwarts. _We_ hardly believed it when we found out. I mean, come on, a _werewolf_ at _Hogwarts_? That's just daft."

"Thanks Prongs, I feel _loads_ better now."

"Oh stop your whining, Moony," Sirius said. "You're just being paranoid. No one is going to figure it out. Hate to break it to you, but you just don't fit the 'blood-thirsty monster' profile that most people here seem to think fits a werewolf. You have nothing to worry about."

Remus snorted. "Me? Nothing to worry about? I'll believe _that_ when it happens."

"I think Prongs and Padfoot are right, Moony," piped up Peter. "It doesn't seem likely that anyone else could figure it out. We only did because we live with you and you're our friend. I don't think anyone else could know unless they were spying on you or something."

Remus still looked worried, but apparently didn't want to argue anymore. "I guess," he said. "I just worry about it a lot. Especially after today…" His voice trailed away, and it was suddenly alarmingly transparent how much pain he was in, how much he had been hurt today.

James walked over and sat down next to Remus on his bed on the opposite side from Peter. "They're wrong," James said firmly, gripping Remus's shoulder. "They're wrong and they will never be right. They can never be right when they say horrible things about werewolves, because there will always be at least one exception."

Remus looked at him. "I know that. I'm sorry," he told James. "I shouldn't have been angry. You're a great friend for standing up for me down there."

James shook his head. "You were right, though; it was stupid. I should have known better than to risk giving away your secret. I'm sorry."

"Don't be," said Remus. "You guys are probably right, anyway. It wouldn't be very likely that anyone would figure it out. I'm probably worried for nothing. They'd have to be obsessed with me or something to see the pattern. I probably have nothing to worry about."

* * *

"I don't believe it."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't believe it."

"It makes perfect sense!"

"It makes no sense whatsoever."

"You just don't _want_ to believe it's true," said Severus.

"No, I don't," Lily replied composedly. "I hate to think that something that terrible could happen to someone that nice."

"Oh, yeah," said Severus sarcastically, "I feel _so sorry_ for the poor werewolf."

"I still don't think it's true."

"But it fits, Lily, it fits!" He paused for a minute as something seemed to occur to him. "What do you mean 'someone that nice'?"

"I mean that he's a nice person," said Lily. "He has bad taste in mates, perhaps, but he's not a bad guy himself you know."

"Do you _like_ him?"

"No," said Lily. Severus was the _last_ person she would have thought would want to discuss her crushes. She usually saved that talk for her girlfriends. "He's just a friend, Sev."

Severus did his best to hide his relief. "Yeah, well, I'm pretty sure that your 'friend' is a werewolf."

"He is _not_."

"Then how do _you_ explain Potter's werewolf defense last night? _You_ were the one who told me about it. _You_ were the one who mentioned that you thought it was weird."

"Yes, _I_ did. But that doesn't suggest to me that Lupin is a werewolf. It just suggests that Potter might know a werewolf, not that the werewolf lives at school with him."

"Okay," said Severus, rolling his eyes, "so according to you: Potter has a mate who's a werewolf, and he has a mate who's ill at every full moon, but he two are completely unrelated and it's all just a giant coincidence?"

"Can I just say it's a bit creepy that you track his absences well enough to pick out that kind of pattern?"

"Do you really think it's a coincidence though?"

Lily looked around the snowy courtyard they were sitting in. They were the only two there, but she could see some boys having a snowball fight out a ways in the grounds. She watched them for a minute, pondering Severus's words.

"Maybe you're right," she said finally. "Maybe I _don't_ believe it because I don't _want_ to." She sighed. "But I still don't believe it."

* * *

Author's Notes: Reviews are always appreciated!


	7. Paws, Prefects, and Pretty Girls

Paws, Prefects, and Pretty Girls

_Remus had thought he had seen quite enough of Saint Mungo's recently. Apparently he had been wrong, for here he sat, once again, in the magical hospital. At least he was in a different ward this time. He wasn't in the Creature Induced Injuries ward where he had spent a week after he had been bitten. He was in the one ward in the hospital which, according to his mother, who was Muggle-born, resembled a ward in Muggle hospital: the maternity ward. It wasn't even part of the main hospital, but a side branch. Even still, Remus did not like being back in the hospital._

_He had been very scared earlier that night, when he had been hugging his mother on the sofa and she had suddenly let out a cry of pain. At first Remus had thought he had hugged her too tight. Then he worried that he had hurt the baby, despite his promise to his parents moments before. But he hadn't hurt the baby; at least that was what his dad had told him. According to his dad, tonight was the night that the baby was going to be born._

_Remus had still been worried. If he hadn't hurt Mum or the baby, why was Mum in so much pain? Surely having a baby couldn't be _that _painful, right? And surely all of this yelling his mother was doing wasn't necessary?_

_Remus's dad had not let him in the room where the baby was being born. Remus told his dad that he wanted to see how the baby was going to get out of Mummy's tummy. How the baby had gotten in her tummy in the first place was something Remus still didn't fully understand, and wouldn't understand for quite a few years. But Remus's father had refused to let him in to see the baby's birth, and now Remus sat alone in the waiting area of the maternity ward, listening to his mum yelling and his dad yelling and the healer yelling at his mum to just push a little harder._

_"I AM PUSHING!"_

_Oh how Remus hated the hospital._

_He wanted to go home. He still felt achy from the night before. The cut and scratches on all over him still felt raw. He was tired and he wanted to curl up in his bed, not this hard chair in the cold waiting room where his father had put him. He wanted to pull the blanket up over his head and hide from the memories that were haunting his mind. Memories he could make neither head nor tail of. Memories of pain, of his body changing, of something inside him taking control, of darkness and blood, of – _

_"Are you okay little boy?"_

_Remus opened his eyes. He hadn't even realized that they had been closed or that he had been drifting off the sleep. He straightened himself slightly in his chair to face the woman who was crouching down in front of him. She was younger than his mom and had dark, curly hair. She was wearing lime-green robes and was smiling in a friendly way, though her eyes looked concerned._

_"My daddy said I'm not supposed to talk to strangers," he told the woman._

_"Well, your daddy's right," she said. "But I work here in the hospital, so it's okay to talk to me. Where is your daddy?"_

_"With my mummy."_

_"And where is your mummy?"_

_"She's having a baby."_

_"Oohhh, I see," she said. "Did he leave you here to wait all by yourself?"_

_"Yes," Remus said. The woman pursed her lips and seemed on the verge of saying something, but Remus beat her to it. "Are you a healer?" he asked._

_"I'm an assistant healer, yes," she said._

_Remus frowned. He had mixed feelings about healers. When he been in the hospital after he was bitten, some of the healers were what his mum called "sympathetic" and had been nice, but most of them had been cold or mean to him, and he just didn't understand why. And then there was the look. Everyone had given him this funny look. He didn't know why they did it or even what it meant. He only knew that it wasn't a friendly look and he didn't like it at all._

_"Are you a nice healer or a mean healer?" Remus asked. It was best if he knew these things up front._

_She slightly smiled again. "Well, I like to think that I'm a nice healer." Then her smile was gone again. "Why? Did you meet some mean healers?"_

_Remus nodded._

_"When?"_

_"When I was here before."_

_"You were here as a patient?" she asked. Remus nodded. "When?" she asked, her voice heavy with sympathy and concern._

_"After I was bitten."_

_"Bitten? Bitten by what?"_

_"By a werewolf."_

_And there it was: the look. The woman, who had been kneeling right in front of his chair was suddenly on her feet and several strides away, her wide eyes giving Remus the look he had come to hate. Remus flinched at the horrible sense of déjà vu, curling up in his chair again, not because he was sleepy, but because he wanted to protect himself. He hated the hospital. He hated the look. He hated this healer. She had said she was nice. She had lied. If she were nice, she wouldn't look at him like that. He wanted to leave. He wanted his mummy and daddy._

_"Remus?"_

_Remus looked up. He had never been so happy to see his father in his life. John was walking toward Remus grinning from ear to ear. "It's a girl!" he said. He bent down and hugged his son. "Congratulations Remus! You have a new baby sister!"_

_"Can I see her?" Remus asked breathlessly._

_"Of course you can," his father replied. Remus climbed out of his seat and took his father's hand. They started to walk away…_

_"Excuse me."_

_They turned back. It was the healer who had spoken. Remus had almost forgotten about her when his dad had come, but she was still there. But she wasn't looking at Remus anymore. She was looking at John._

_"Yes?" John replied. He was still grinning, apparently too happy to register the cold look he was receiving from the healer._

_"I don't think you should take him back there with you," the healer said._

_John's grin faded slightly as confusion clouded his expression. "Why not?"_

_The healer glanced briefly at Remus before looking back at John. "Because I don't think that a maternity ward is a suitable place for someone like him."_

_The grin was gone. "What do you mean 'someone like him'?"_

_"I don't know what kind of world you live in, sir, but in my world we don't allow Dark creatures around newborn babies! I'm afraid I can't permit this."_

_"And I'm afraid this is none of your business." John said, his look and his tone now matching hers in temperature._

_"I think it _is_ my business," she replied._

_"Was he bothering you?" John asked._

_"What?"_

_"My son, was he bothering you?"_

_"Well, no, he was just sitting there-"_

_"He was just sitting there, not bothering anybody, but for some reason you decided that it was your business to butt in where you don't belong and tell my son what he can and cannot do?" John's voice was rising steadily with his temper._

_"Sir, I just think it's wrong-"_

_"Shove what you think! I don't give a damn. My son has every right to be here and see his sister and you have no right to say otherwise. You don't know anything about him and you have no right to judge him. So, if you no what's good for you, lady, you'll bugger off and leave me and my family alone!"_

_The healer didn't say anything. Eventually, she gave a contemptuous huff, shot an angry look from John to Remus, and turned on her heel and stalked away._

_ Breathing deeply, John turned back to his son. Clearly trying to forget the woman and focus on his family, he gave Remus a small smile. "Let's go see your sister then, shall we?"_

_Still holding each other by the hand, they walked out of the waiting room, down a short corridor, and into a ward._

_Remus's mother was lying in a bed, looking exhausted but grinning just as broadly as her husband had been. In her arms was a bundled up blanket._

_John helped Remus climb up onto the bed next to his mother. Fay smiled at her son. "Hi Remus, would you like to meet your sister?"_

_Remus then saw, with surprise, that the bundled up blanket in his mother's arms had a baby inside it. A real baby! His very own baby sister!_

_"She's small," Remus observed._

_"Yes, she is," said Fay. "But she'll get bigger. They always do." She looked at her husband. "John, are you okay?"_

_John gave her an almost-completely sincere smile. "I'm fine."_

_"John…"_

_"Later," John said quietly, laying a gentle hand on Remus shoulder. "Not now."_

_Fay held his gaze for a moment, then nodded. She turned her attention back to the baby. "Hi baby girl," she said, smiling. "So what do you think of your new family?"_

_The baby made a sleepy noise but didn't elaborate._

_"Can I hold her?" Remus asked._

_John hesitated for the briefest moment before saying, "Sure you can."_

_He helped Remus off of the bed and sat him down in a chair beside it. He took the baby from his wife's arms and turned to his son._

_"You have to be very careful when you hold a baby, Remus."_

_"I will be," Remus assured him. John carefully lowered the baby into Remus's arms. "Watch her head," he instructed._

_Remus held his baby sister for the very first time. It was a surreal experience, even for someone who was only four. She seemed even smaller now than when he had seen his mother holding her. Her eyes were closed, but he could hear her breathing. She was very warm._

_"She's beautiful, isn't she?" Remus's father asked. He was still right beside Remus to make sure the baby was okay. "She going to be a very pretty girl when she grows up."_

_Remus was going to have to take his dad's word on that, because all he saw was small, not pretty. Still, he was growing attached to her, small as she was. Her warm weight was comforting in his arms._

_"You're going to help us take care of her aren't you?" John asked Remus._

_"Yes," said Remus. He lifted his eyes to look at his parents. "What's her name?"_

_"Well," said Fay, "we hadn't really decided that yet."_

_"What do you think," John asked Remus. "What do you think your sister's name should be?"_

"Kytalin!"

"What?"

John Lupin turned around in the front passenger seat of the car to look at his daughter in the back. "Are you going to whine all of the way to the station?"

"Maybe," said Kytalin.

Remus, who was seated in the back of the car beside his little sister, rolled his eyes. Ever since he had returned home for the summer he had noticed that Kytalin was showing all of the signs of becoming a pre-teen. She had developed an attitude and was suddenly much more interested in her appearance than she ever had been. And she was only ten! If she was this bad when she was only a pre-teen, Remus couldn't imagine what she would be like as a teenager.

"It's not fair!" Kytalin shouted for the eighth time since that had gotten in the car to drive to Kings Cross and at least the hundredth time that summer.

"Life's not fair," Remus told her. He ran his finger over the large, barely-healed scratches that were slashed across the right side of his face, souvenirs of the full moon three days ago. They were particularly gruesome, even for him, and very obvious. Remus wondered how he was going to explain them away to curious students. Poorly, he supposed, as he always did. Most people had stopped asking him about every little injury he procured; he always had so many, it was hard to keep up. He was pretty sure that most people had come to the conclusion that he was just extremely accident-prone. However, with scratches as large and painful-looking as these, Remus couldn't help but worry that he would attract some awkward questions.

"I should be allowed to go!" Kytalin protested, ignoring Remus.

"You're not old enough," Remus told her as calmly as he could. He had had this argument with her so many times this summer that he was losing his patience.

"I'm almost old enough," Kytalin whined, "And I'm smart too! It's not like those kids who are a few months older than me are going to do any better than I would."

"You have to be eleven," Remus said.

"I'll be eleven in _three weeks!_"

"Yes," said Remus, "and when you go to Hogwarts _next year_, you'll be one of the oldest in your class."

Kytalin glowered at him. "I should be allowed to go _this year_."

"Why are you still whining about this?" Remus asked her. "It's too late; it's September 1st. You wouldn't have time to go get all of your school stuff for the start of term even if they would let you come to school a year early. You're just going to have to wait it out like everyone else."

"They could make special arrangements for me."

"They won't make special arrangements for you."

"They made special arrangements for _you_," Kytalin said angrily.

"Yep," said Remus. He refused to say anymore or pay her any more attention. He stared out the car window, watching London roll by, thinking about the upcoming school year.

Kytalin's temper was only increased by Remus's determination to ignore her. She whined for a bit more, then ended up kicking the back of her mother's seat in frustration.

"Girls who are old enough to go to Hogwarts don't throw tantrums," Fay told her daughter.

"Well apparently I'm not old enough to go! So I can do whatever I want!" Kytalin shouted.

Remus sighed. What had happened to the nice little girl he had said goodbye to last Christmas? What happened to the pretty little girl who had been so quiet, who had looked up to her older brother with reverence, who had always been so sweet? What had happened to the little baby Remus had held in the Saint Mungo's maternity ward almost eleven years ago and named after the heroine in a Wizarding storybook his mother had read to him before he was bitten? She had grown up, that's what had happened, and Remus wasn't sure that he liked that at all.

They finally arrived at the station. After circling a few times to find a good parking spot, Remus's mother parked the car and Remus unloaded his trunk.

"You want to push the cart?" Remus asked Kytalin.

"No," said Kytalin, who was still pouting.

So Remus pushed the trolley into the station and through the barrier between Platforms 9 and 10. Remus's mother came through next, followed shortly by his dad and Kytalin, who appeared to have taken the barrier at a run.

"It's still quite early," Fay said once they were all together again, checking her watch. "Do you want us to stick around until the train leaves, Remus, or should we say our goodbyes now?"

"You guys don't have to wait," Remus said, looking at the clock overhead. It was only half past. "I can probably manage on my own from here."

"Well then," said Fay, pulling her son into a tight hug, "have a great term Remus."

"Ah, Mum, not too tight," said Remus, wincing. His ribs were still tender from when he had broken them at full moon.

"Oh," said Fay, loosening her hold, "I'm sorry, Remus dear."

"It's okay," he assured her. "I'm going to miss you, Mum. I'll see you at Christmas."

"I'll miss you too dear," she said, releasing him.

"Take care of yourself, Remus," said John, laying a hand on his son's shoulder.

"I always do, Dad," said Remus, "You know me; I like a quiet life."

John pulled his son into a brief hug saying, "See you at Christmas then."

After hugging his dad, Remus turned to Kytalin. She was staring at the train with her arms folded and her lips set in a pout

"Aren't you going to say goodbye to me?" Remus asked her.

Kytalin let out an exaggerated sigh. "I guess."

He bent down and hugged her. "You're going to miss me," he told her.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," said Kytalin.

Remus laughed a little. "You behave yourself, you hear me?"

She looked at him for a minute, then said, with no hint of sarcasm or attitude, "Okay."

"Well then," said Fay, "I guess we're off."

"Goodbye," said Remus as he and his family went in their opposite directions.

"Goodbye," they all called back at him. They crossed back though the barrier, and were gone.

Remus set off for the train. He still had some time to kill before it left, so he decided to find a compartment for his stuff, as he would be riding in the Prefect's carriage at the start of the trip. He had been pleased but rather surprised to have been made a Prefect. He wasn't the most well behaved Gryffindor in his year. He did look to be the picture of obedience when standing beside James and Sirius, but so did pretty much anyone else. Remus wondered if he had been given the badge in hopes that he would be able to exercise some authority over his fellow Marauders. If this was the case, then Dumbledore and McGonagall did not know his friends like he did. _Nothing_ would ever deter James and Sirius from their mischief, not a hoard of stampeding elephants, and certainly not a Prefect.

His parents had been nothing short of ecstatic that he had been made a Prefect. Remus felt this had to do with the fact that his parents had pretty low expectations of him, given his condition. It had been a miracle just for Remus to get in to Hogwarts; they had never dreamed he would one day be a Prefect. Remus wasn't sure how he felt about this. He supposed it was nice to have even his littlest achievements celebrated, but sometimes he wished that, on occasion, his parents would dream as big for him as other parents dreamed for their kids. Still, even for a normal boy, becoming a Prefect was a pretty big deal.

It was with this thought that Remus decided to change into his robes and put on his badge. Once he had, he went back out on to the platform to look for his friends. There were considerably more people there now than when he had said goodbye to his family, but the platform was not yet the mob scene Remus knew it would become as eleven o'clock drew nearer. He scanned the crowd for familiar faces.

Then, behind him, he heard a loud whistle and someone called, "Oi! Moony!"

Remus turned to see a bespectacled boy with untidy black hair waving at him from beside his dark-haired parents. Remus grinned and made a beeline for the Potters.

Mr. and Mrs. Potter, who were dressed in their Muggle best, smiled at Remus as he approached. James had gotten his extremely untidy black hair from his father. According to him, it was a trait that had plagued generations of Potter men before them.

"Alright there, Moony?" James asked, clapping his friend on the shoulder. It hurt a bit, but Remus shook it off.

"I'm fine. And you, Prongs?"

"Never better."

"It's good to see you again, Remus," said Mr. Potter, extending his hand to Remus.

"And you, sir," Remus said as they shook hands.

"How was your summer?" Mrs. Potter asked him.

"It was good. Pretty quiet."

Remus saw her eyes lingering on the vicious scratches across his face, but she said nothing about them, for with he was grateful. James had told his parents a few years ago about Remus's condition. To Remus's relief and delight, the Potters had accepted James's assurances that Remus was safe without a single question. They trusted their son's judgment, and Remus liked them very much for it.

James lacked his mother's subtlety. "Merlin, Moony, how many times do I have to tell you?" he asked, examining the right side of Remus's face, "You've got to stop scratching yourself in places everyone can see!"

"James!" Mrs. Potter said sternly.

"Gee, Prongs, great advice," Remus said, rolling his eyes. "Why didn't I just think of that?"

"Well, it would avoid awkward questions," said James.

"So far, you're the only one who's mentioned it," said Remus.

James looked away from Remus's scratches to take in the rest of his friend's appearance. Unsurprisingly, his eyes fixed on Remus's chest.

"What is _that?_" he asked, pointing openly at the badge pinned to the front of Remus's robes. Of course, James already knew what it was.

"It's a Prefect badge," said Remus.

James gave him a rather appalled look. "You're a _Prefect?_" he asked, he tone making it perfectly clear how he felt about the matter.

"It would appear so," said Mrs. Potter. "Congratulations, Remus."

"Thank you," said Remus, smiling at her.

"Moony," said James, "how did this happen?" He might have been asking Remus how about came the end of the world.

"Search me," said Remus, shrugging. "I wasn't expecting it."

"But…but…now you're going to have to _follow the rules!_" said James, again, as though it was the end of the world.

"I usually follow the rules," Remus pointed out. "You're the one who has a penchant for shattering them into pieces."

James considered him. "Well, I suppose that's true."

"Maybe you'll start behaving yourself," Mr. Potter said to his son, "now you've got a Prefect around to look after you."

"Yeah, that's likely," said James sarcastically.

Mr. Potter's response was lost to a snarl from someone coming up just behind Remus. Remus turned, this time to see Sirius hurrying towards them looking exceptionally pissed off.

"I – can't – stand – her!" he breathed between clenched teeth. "Honestly," he said, "can we get on the train now? I need to get as far away from her as humanly possible." No one needed to ask whom he was talking about.

"So, had a good summer, Padfoot?" James asked brightly.

Sirius glowered at James for a minute, then turned to Remus, by whom he was distracted.

"What, in the name of Merlin, is that _disgusting thing_ you've got pinned to the front of your robes?" Sirius shouted at Remus.

"It's a Prefect's badge," James told him darkly.

Sirius gaped. "Take it off!" he demanded of Remus.

"What?" Remus asked.

"You've got to take it off, Moony," Sirius said. "That thing, that badge; it's got to go. I can't be seen with someone wearing one of those! Think of what it would do to my reputation!"

"I think your 'reputation' is solid enough to stand the shame of being seen with a Prefect," Remus assured him.

Sirius winced noticeably at the word 'Prefect'. "I'm not so sure," he muttered, "if people thought _I_ was associated with an authority figure… I can't even think about it it's so bad!"

"Trust me, Padfoot, you'll live," said Remus.

"But if you don't, we'll remember you fondly," said James.

"Gee, thanks."

"Where's your stuff?" Remus asked; Sirius was empty handed.

Sirius swore. "Shit, I left it with _her,_ didn't I?"

"Left what with who?"

Peter and his mother came striding up to the five of them. Peter was pushing his trunk on a trolley in front of him.

"My effing trunk," Sirius explained to Peter. He sighed. "Do you really think it's worth going back over there?" he asked them.

"Probably," said Remus.

"Well, Peter and I have got to get our own stuff onto the train," said James, checking his watch. Mrs. Pettigrew was chatting with James's parents behind him.

"I've already got us a compartment," said Remus, "about halfway down the train. I put my cloak on the seat so you'll recognize it. Why don't you guys go load your stuff on the train and I'll go with Padfoot to get his trunk?"

They agreed to the plan (Sirius rather reluctantly), and split up, James retrieving his trunk from his parents and heading to the train with Peter, and Remus and Sirius heading off in the direction of Sirius's mother. As they walked away, Remus heard Peter ask James, "Was Moony wearing a Prefect's badge?"

It was now ten minutes to eleven and the platform was packed. It took them a few minutes of wading though the crowd before they managed to locate Sirius's mother. She was extremely beautiful and looked a lot like Sirius. She also looked extremely unfriendly and intimidating. She was glaring around the crowd with a sort of superior disapproval, and was holding her arms very close around her as if worried she might rub against something (or someone) disgusting in the station. Beside her stood Regulus, who was about to start his second year at Hogwarts, and two luggage-laden trolleys.

"You should probably stay back here," Sirius said, stopping Remus a safe distance from his mother. He was looking at her with a calculating expression on his face, as though trying to formulate the best way to get his trunk with minimal interaction.

"Okay," Remus said. He wasn't at all sorry to be excused from having to meet the infamous Mrs. Black.

Sirius sighed again, then headed for his mother. Remus decided it would be rude to just stand there and stare at them like an idiot, so he let his gaze wander through the crowd until Sirius returned.

"That was fast," said Remus, as he and followed Sirius and his trunk back towards the train.

"Turns out she's not speaking to me," said Sirius indifferently. "It was easier than I expected. So where are the rest of the Lupins?"

"They left. We got here pretty early, so we already said our goodbyes."

"How was your summer?"

"It was fine. My sister drove me a little nuts, but," Remus looked back over his shoulder at Mrs. Black, "doesn't seem like I've got much to complain about."

Sirius looked back as well, "And she wants me home for Christmas too. Big Black family reunion; so it will either end in a single suicide or a mass homicide, depending on my mood."

"Interesting."

"If I go with the homicide thing, can I lay low at your place?"

"My parents would be thrilled about that."

"They're already harboring a werewolf," Sirius pointed out. "Nice face, by the way. Goes lovely with your new badge."

"Don't be jealous, Padfoot."

"Oh, don't worry, Moony. I'm definitely _not_ jealous."

Remus helped Sirius carry his trunk onto the train and into the compartment. James and Peter's stuff was in there, but the two boys had apparently gone back onto the platform to say goodbye to their parents.

"Well," said Sirius, sitting down in a seat and stretching out, "shall we make ourselves comfortable?"

"Sorry, mate, I've got to go sit in the Prefect's carriage for a while."

Sirius winced at 'Prefect' again. Remus could tell it was intentional. "Well I'm not just going to sit here all alone," said Sirius, standing up, "I'm going find the others."

"Tell them where I've gone, will you?" Remus asked, as they headed their separate directions.

"If I came stand the shame," Sirius said melodramatically. He smirked and left the train.

Remus made his way up the corridor. The Prefect's carriage was supposed to be right near the front. It wasn't hard to locate; the Head Boy and Head Girl were standing just outside the compartment door.

"Remus Lupin," said the Head Girl, making a tick next to his name on what was clearly an attendance sheet, "go on inside and sit down." She looked up from her parchment and smiled at him, but her expression changed to puzzled as she took in the scratches on his face. Remus darted into the compartment before she got the chance to ask.

It was clearly the compartment for new Prefects, because all of the people Remus saw were also fifth years. There were five (not including Remus), a boy and girl from Ravenclaw, a sour-looking Slytherin boy, a rather grumpy-looking Hufflepuff girl, and Lily Evans.

Lily was chatting happily with the two Ravenclaws, but turned and smiled at Remus as he entered. "The missing Gryffindor," she said. "How are you, Remus?"

"I'm good," he said, returning her smile and taking the seat next to her, across from the Ravenclaws.

"Remus, you know-" Lily began.

"- Hank and Michelle," Remus finished. "Yes, of course." He had had classes with both Ravenclaws before. He knew neither of them well, but he at least knew their names.

Hank acknowledged Remus with a wave of his hand. Michelle asked, not unkindly, "What did you do to your face?"

_No beating around the bush for this one, I see,_ Remus thought. "Oh, this?" he asked, touching his hand to the scratches on his face as though he had forgotten they were there, which he hadn't. "My uncle's dog. Yeah, we went to visit him a couple of days ago and Killer just took a big swipe out of my face. You've gotta love family visits." He was becoming a better liar, but apparently not good enough.

"But couldn't you heal them with magic?" Michelle asked, "I mean, you're parents are wizards, aren't they?"

_Wow, look at that. Is it time to change the subject already?_ "So how was your summer, Hank?" Remus asked.

"He was just telling us about it," said Michelle, seemingly oblivious to the abrupt change in subject; she was clearly one of those easily distracted types. Hank filled Remus in on the events of his summer. As Hank talked, the last two fifth year Prefects arrived and the train pulled out of the station. Once the last waving parent had been whipped out of view, the Head Boy and Head Girl came into the compartment.

Julie Bishop and Fredrick Hurley (the newly appointed Head Girl and Boy) were nice enough, so the next hour and a half in their company passed enjoyably. Remus, Lily, Michelle, Hank, and the other four new Prefects listened as Julie and Fredrick explained all of the new responsibilities they would have now, but livened up the dull list of rules and duties with some fun anecdotes about their own experiences as Prefects.

When the Heads left to go talk to the sixth and seventh years, Remus stuck around for a little while to exchange more summer stories. Lily told them all about her sister's new prat of a boyfriend, Vernon (whom she had cleverly nicknamed Vermin), and how hard she had had to resist the urge to turn him into some kind of amphibian. The new Hufflepuff, a boy called Kern Henderson, introduced himself and told a few of his own summer stories. The Hufflepuff girl, Chelsea, had disappeared the moment that Julie and Fredrick had, but the two Slytherins stayed a while. They sat together in the corner whispering to each other and shooting evil looks at Kern and Lily. Remus had an idea he knew what that was about; it appeared that the Slytherins didn't believe that Muggle-borns were good enough to be Prefects. _Wonder what they'd say about a werewolf Prefect…_

Eventually, the Slytherins departed, and not long after, Lily and Remus decided to take their leave.

"We'll be seeing you then," said Kern, waving and grinning at Remus as he and Lily exited. Remus smiled back and closed the compartment door.

"Well," Lily said cheerfully as they set off down the train, "at least we have a few good people to do Prefect duty with."

"Yeah," said Remus, "and a few not-so-good people."

"They can't all be wonderful, I suppose."

Remus and Lily walked together until they reached the compartment that James, Sirius, and Peter occupied.

"Finally!" said Sirius when Remus opened the compartment door. "Did they hold you lot hostage or something, mate? You've been ages!"

"I'll see you later, Remus," said Lily. She turned and continued to walk down the train, looking for her own friends.

"Bye," said Remus. He entered the compartment and closed the door.

"_Damn!_" James said the moment the door was closed, "Evans had a _good_ summer, didn't she?"

"She said it was okay," said Remus, taking a seat beside Peter. "Her sister's got a new boyfriend whose pretty annoying apparently, but otherwise her holiday was pretty good."

"I don't think that that's what Prongs was talking about," said Sirius. "I think he was referring to _other aspects_ of Evans's summer."

"Like what?" Remus asked.

"Like the fact that she's a totally hot!" said James, standing up and pressing his face against the window in the compartment door to watch Lily walking away. "I mean, she's always been pretty, but she was definitely not _that_ hot last year."

"I didn't really notice," said Remus.

"Didn't notice! Are you blind, Moony? She's amazing!"

"Aww," said Peter, "I fink widdle Prongsie is in wuv!"

"Am not!" James snapped, turning away from the door, his face rather red. "I just think she's hot. I don't see how you don't see it, Moony."

"I guess she's just not my type."

"You have a type?" Sirius asked. "What, does girl have to sprout fangs and grow fur once a month to catch _your_ eye?"

"No," said Remus composedly, "I'm just saying that _Evans_ isn't my type."

"So you don't mind if I ask her out?" asked James in a rush.

"Um, no offense Prongs, but I don't think she likes you very much," said Remus. _Boy, was that an understatement._

"Oh, she just hasn't seen the right side of me, that's all," said James confidently. "I just have to woo her, then she'll see how much she likes me. I think I'll go find her now." He opened the compartment door and stepped out into the corridor.

"A little eager now, aren't we Prongsie?" asked Sirius.

"The moment is opportune," said James. He closed the door behind him and hurried off.

"Oh, he has it _bad_," said Sirius.

James walked down the train, looking into each compartment to see whether Lily was in them. Toward the end of the train, he saw her, standing outside one of the compartments talking to Delangela Narkin.

"Hi there, Evans," he said in his deepest and sexiest voice. "Narkin," he added, nodding at her.

"Hi Potter," said Delangela. "How was your holiday?"

"It was fine," James said to her shortly. Then he turned soft eyes on Lily. "How was your summer, Evans?"

She eyed him suspiciously, clearly off-put by his unusual amount of interest and his odd tone. He usually ignored her. "It was okay, I guess."

"Just okay?" James asked, looking as though he were troubled that her summer hadn't been super fantastically amazingly awesome.

"Yeah," said Lily, "nothing special."

"Oh," said James, "that's a shame. Well, maybe this year will be a bit more exciting for you." He flashed her a smile.

She raised an eyebrow, more suspicious than ever. "Yeah," she said shortly. "Maybe."

Delangela looked as though she was trying hard not to laugh. Lily didn't understand what was so funny.

"I guess I'll be seeing you around then," said James, looking intensely at Lily.

"Err, sure," said Lily.

"You ladies enjoy the rest of your trip now," he said. He winked at Lily and walked away.

As soon as he was far enough up train that he was no longer in earshot, Delangela burst out laughing.

"What?" Lily asked her, still a little bemused by the peculiar behavior of James Potter. "What's so funny, Del?"

Delangela didn't respond. She was laughing too hard to form coherent words and was starting to attract stares from other people in the corridor.

"Come on," Lily said irritably, grabbing her cackling friend by the arm, opening the door of the compartment behind them, and dragging Delangela inside.

There were already four girls in the compartment, all in Lily and Delangela's year, Mary and Betsy from Gryffindor, and Gretchen and Jane from Hufflepuff. The girls broke off mid-conversation as Lily and Delangela entered and all turned to stare at Delangela as she collapsed into a seat beside Jane, still laughing hard.

"What's so funny, Del?" Mary asked as Lily sat down next to her.

Delangela swallowed several times as she attempted to control herself. Then she said, with tears of laughter still swimming in her eyes, "James Potter just hit on Lily!"

"HE DID _WHAT_?" Lily, Mary, and Gretchen all exclaimed at the same time.

"Seriously?" Jane asked.

"James Potter hit on you?" Betsy asked Lily.

"No he didn't!" Lily said. "He just…" Her face drained of color. The strange looks, the odd, deeper voice, the phrases 'maybe this year will be a bit more exciting for you' and 'I'll be seeing you around then', and the wink flashed through her memory, and suddenly it was all painfully clear. "Oh my god, James Potter just hit on me."

Mary and Gretchen started to giggle. Jane looked as bemused as Lily felt. Delangela was smirking. Betsy asked, "So, are you two going out then?"

"NO. WAY."

"Oh, why not, Lily?" Mary asked. "He _is_ cute."

"Since when is mad-scientist hair cute?" Lily asked.

"It's not mad-scientist," Mary said, "it's windswept."

"Yeah," Gretchen agreed. "And he's got a great smile."

"He has an arrogant leer," Lily said tonelessly.

"And I thought you liked boys in specs," Delangela said to Lily. "Didn't you have a crush on that Pierre kid last year?"

"I think that was more for his accent than for his glasses," Betsy said.

"He does have an amazing accent," Jane sighed.

"But he's not a Quidditch player," Gretchen said. "Potter's an amazing Quidditch player."

"Who cares?" Lily asked.

"I do," Gretchen said. "He's so talented."

"He's amazing," Mary gushed.

"So he can throw around a stupid red ball," Lily said. "What's that matter to me?"

"Athletic physic," Mary said.

"Can't beat a Quidditch player's body, that's for sure," Gretchen said.

"I'd rather have a plain non-Quidditch-player whom I can tolerate over an insufferable idiot like Potter any day."

"I don't find him completely insufferable," Betsy said.

"Then why don't you date him?" Lily asked Betsy.

"Because he wasn't flirting with _her_ in the corridor," Delangela said. "Come on, Lils, he is pretty attractive. Nothing on Black, of course, but…"

"Oh, here we go," Lily sighed. Everyone knew tat Delangela was still as much in love with Sirius Black as ever. It hadn't stopped her from having a positive battalion of boyfriends over the last few years, but it was still plain that her heart belonged to Black.

"I'm just saying," Delangela said, "that you could do a lot worse than Potter."

"I could do no worse than Potter," Lily said.

"I disagree," Jane said. "You could be dating some creepy, Death-Eater-wannabe Slytherin."

"Like that Snape kid," Mary said venomously.

Lily turned to look at Mary, very surprised. Mary knew that Lily and Severus were friends, and even though Lily knew that Mary disliked Severus, Mary had always refrained from openly criticizing him for this reason.

"Severus is my friend," Lily said coldly.

"Is he?" Mary asked, her voice full of uncharacteristic sarcasm. "Is he still your friend, Lily? That's odd. I wouldn't have thought he would still want to be friends with someone like _you_."

"What's that supposed to mean, 'someone like me'?" Lily asked.

Mary shifted in her seat, her expression very sour. "Ran into your 'friend' Severus on the platform this morning. Want to know what he said to me?"

"What?" Lily asked in a small voice.

"He called me a Mudblood," Mary spat.

"Oh Mary!" Betsy said, putting an arm around her friend.

"He's wrong, Mary," Gretchen said firmly.

"But…but he couldn't have," Lily spluttered.

Mary glared at her. "Imagined it, did I?" she snapped. "I heard what he said and so did half-a-dozen of his snake-friends who were with him!"

"But Severus would never…"

"Oh, you don't think so?" Mary asked. "Think he's still just a wonderful friend? Open your eyes Lily! He's one of them now. He's always been one of them really. And if he thinks my blood is dirty just because my parents are muggles then what makes you any different?"

The compartment was silent. Lily was lost for words. How could this have happened? It didn't make any sense. Severus knew that having muggles for parents didn't make any difference. He had said so himself when he had first told her about the Wizarding world. And even though he was hanging with less-than-desirable crowd these days, she still couldn't see how he could possibly call anyone a Mudblood. But…why would Mary have said it had happened if it hadn't? Mary wasn't the type to invent stories for the sake of gossip; that was Delangela's job. She couldn't see why Mary would lie about it, but it still just could not be true. Severus was different. Severus would never call Mary a Mudblood.

Would he?

* * *

James Potter strutted back up the train feeling very satisfied with himself after his conversation with Lily Evans. Wow was she beautiful! Was this something new, or had she always been beautiful and he had just never noticed? He supposed that it didn't matter; he noticed her now. And after his brief conversation with her a minute ago, he knew that she was into him too. _Well of course she is,_ James thought. _Who could possibly resist me?_

He thought of Lily Evans all the way back to his compartment, but then became distracted when he tried to open the compartment door. It was locked. _Why did they lock the door?_ James wondered. _And why did they let the blinds down too?_

"Who's there?" Remus's tense voice called from inside the compartment. They must have heard him trying to open the door.

"It's Father Christmas," James called back irritably. "It's Prongs, you moron, open up!"

"Give us a minute, Prongs," Remus called back. There was a thump and the sound of Sirius swearing loudly inside the compartment. What on earth were they doing?

James waited impatiently for them to do whatever it was they needed to do before they opened the door, all the while enjoying a symphony of Sirius's colorful vocabulary. Finally, Remus opened the door just wide enough to stick his head out. "Okay, you can come in now." He opened the door a faction more and James squeezed his way inside. Remus stuck his head out again, looked once up the train, once down the train, then quickly pulled his head back in and slammed and locked the door.

"What in the name of Merlin have you been doing in here?" James asked, his eyes moving from Remus, to Peter, to Sirius, the last of whom had his arms hidden under Remus's balled-up cloak on his lap.

"Padfoot has been…practicing," Remus explained, sitting down next to Peter.

"He was showing us how far he got over the summer," Peter said. "But then there was a problem…"

"A problem?" James asked, taking the seat beside Sirius.

Sirius pulled his arms out from under Remus's cloak. His forearms were covered in thick black hair and his hands had turned into large black paws. "I got stuck," he explained. "It's happened before. It always goes away eventually, but it's bloody annoying! I can't let anyone see me like this! Ugh, did I tell you guys about the time over the summer when I had to go down to dinner trying to hide my tail beneath my robes?"

"No, you didn't," Peter said. "How was it?"

"Uncomfortable," Sirius said shortly.

"Don't worry about it too much, mate," James said. "I've gotten stuck before too."

"So have I," said Peter. "All the time."

"And trust me, antlers are a lot harder to hide than a tail," James added.

"Yeah, but how am I supposed to hide _these?_" Sirius asked, holding up his paws.

James shrugged. "Shove them in your pockets?" he suggested.

"Which is great," said Sirius, "until I have to doing something that requires hands and opposable thumbs."

"You'll change back before we get to the station," Peter assured him. "We still have ages. Even I don't get stuck for that long."

"Right," Sirius mumbled.

"Did you get a lot of practice over the summer?" Remus asked James.

"As much as I could," James said. "But I was pretty busy this summer."

Remus nodded.

"Want me to show you how far I got?" James asked.

"Hell no," said Sirius. "There's not enough room in here for your huge antlers, especially if you can't get rid of them once you change back."

"Padfoot has a point," Remus said. "You can show us tonight in the dormitory."

"Have you gotten to the point where you can change completely into a stag?" Sirius asked. "Or do you still have some human parts?"

"No, I can change completely," James said. "But it's a rough change, and it takes a long time."

"Yeah," said Peter. "Padfoot had only got halfway transformed when you came back, and then, obviously, he got stuck changing back."

"What about you?" James asked Peter. "Can you transform completely?"

"I'm _so close,_" Peter moaned, sounding very frustrated. "I can get to the point where I have no human features, but I still can't get the damn tail right!"

"Not really living up to your name then, are you, Wormtail?" Sirius smirked.

"Where as you are just a fine example of your name," James told Sirius, lifting one of Sirius's fur-covered arms to show off the padded underside of Sirius's paw.

"True," said Sirius. "People will finally understand my nickname."

"And mine if I get stuck with antlers again," James said, releasing Sirius's dog-arm.

"Just so long as no one figures out mine," Remus said. "But don't you think you'll raise a tiny bit of suspicion if you walk around sporting antlers and padded paws?"

"Right. We'll just keep it quiet like always then," James said.

"But then no one will ever understand," said Sirius.

"That was kind of the point, remember?" Remus asked.

"I was joking," Sirius told him.

"I know," Remus replied.

"Well," James sighed, "at least it won't always be like this." He patted Sirius's paw.

"That's true," Remus said. "Once you're true Animagi, you can't be part human and part animal, even if you wanted to. You have to choose one form or the other, there's no middle ground, and the transition is smooth and quick."

"That's the part I'm looking forward to," Peter said. "An easy transformation. It's _so_ hard right now. You have to put every bit of effort you can into it and be one hundred percent focused. And even when I do that, I still can't get the effing tail! But once you're a true Animagus, the transformation is supposed to be almost effortless."

"Yeah," said James, "being true Animagi will be great. This transformation process is probably the hardest thing we've ever done – including making the Map. I won't be sorry to see the end of it when we can just reap the rewards without all the hard work. And, if all goes to plan, things won't just get easier for the three of us, they'll also get better for Moony, which was, I believe, was the whole point in the first place."

"You believe?" Peter asked. "This was your idea!"

"I know," James said proudly. "I'm so brilliant." _It's part of what makes me so irresistible to girls like Evans,_ he added in his head.

"But until we reach the point of true Animagi, we're still just part-human part-animal freaks," Sirius said, pushing his hair back out of his face with his paw.

"And until you become true Animagi," Remus said, "you can't come to the Shrieking Shack with me. You need to be completely stable in your animal forms. There can't be any chance that I might mistake one of you for a snack."

"Here here," Peter said a little darkly.

"But it can't be too long," James said in a rallying tone. "If we've all reached the point where we can change completely – or completely sans tail – it's probably only a matter of mouths before we're finish it. Bet you we all can do it before Halloween!"

"That's pretty ambitious," Remus said.

"Why don't we shoot for before Christmas?" Sirius asked.

"Fine," James huffed, "if you want to aim for sub-par…"

The rest of the train journey passed very enjoyably. They talked, they laughed, and they ate the food James, Sirius, and Peter had purchased from the trolley while Remus was at his Prefect meeting. James tossed Every Flavor Beans for Sirius to catch in his mouth, since he couldn't get any for himself, which culminated in an interesting struggle between them when James tossed Sirius a toe fungus-flavored bean, which Sirius choked on and spat out before leaping on James. James won the fight; Sirius's large paws were superior to James's fists for direct blows, but James's opposable thumbs could still hold a wand, and one well placed curse was enough to put an end to the struggle.

Sirius managed to turn his paws back into hands just as the lamps went on in the compartments. He, James, and Peter, changed into robes as Remus watched the night get darker outside the window. In what seemed like no time, the Hogwarts Express pulled into Hogsmeade station. Remus's heart skipped; he was so glad to be back at Hogwarts, which made him think of something…

"Let's go quick so we can get a carriage together," Sirius said as people started to surge out of their compartments.

"Aren't you supposed to help shepherd the firsties, Moony?" James asked. "Moony?"

Remus was pulling his trunk out of the luggage rack. "Just give me a second, I want to do something. I'll catch you up.

James, Sirius, and Peter vanished out the door and into the mob students. Remus opened the lid of his trunk and quickly extracted a torn off piece of parchment and a self-inking quill. Balancing the fragment of parchment on his knee, he scribbled the following,

_Note to self:_

_Remember to buy a birthday present to send to Kytalin._

He shoved the note into his pocket, replaced the quill, and closed the lid of the trunk. Then, after swinging his cloak over his shoulders, he hurried out to the platform, and also to the start of promising new school year.

* * *

Author's Notes: I'm graduating! Instead of flowers, please send virtual chocolates and reviews!


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